From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Sure

You're welcome!

Shanekorte 05:50, 28 February 2006 (UTC) reply

May I attempt an answer to your question "is a kiss an affair?" One way to define infidelity is within the couple relationship whose psychological/emotional/spiritual contract is betrayed by that kiss. If you considered the kiss an affair and your partner did not, then you have a second order problem (over and above infidelity). That is the ability to communicate and form a flexible but binding agreement with each other that protects the relationship from temptation and trespass. Always check with your partner or future partner at the outset of the relationship what they and you mean by infidelity before you discover a breach of faith retrospectively.-- Ziji 00:41, 22 February 2007 (UTC) reply

Merged

Office romance merged as requested. SilkTork 22:47, 29 May 2006 (UTC) reply

Merge with Adultery

Anyone have any ideas what to do, if anything should be done, about merging these two articles since they overlap quite a bit. Albert109 17:39, 18 June 2006 (UTC) reply

Disagree with merge

Even though they overlap, there is no reason for a full merge. Affairs and adultry are two different things, although at first though they seem to be the same. Also, both articles are long enough to warrant having seperate wiki listings.

Instead, I submit that we remove the {merge} template.

I think this article should be an article referring to the different kinds of affairs, like the Danish one (which I am linking to in the "languages" section in the left menu). The Danish article links to love affairs and affairs like Dreyfus etc. The article being linked to under "Deutsch" (German) only covers love affairs, even though the German wikipedia also has an article simply called Affäre, similar to the Danish one. I think, the interwiki links in general should be pointing to the affair "overview" articles. Apopov ( talk) 17:28, 30 September 2008 (UTC) reply

Split article?

This article seems to be trying to cover two quite distinct meanings of the word "affair" and consequently has ended up as a confusing muddle. How about a split into Extramarital affair (which is already a redirect to this article) and Business affair? Or, alternatively, leave this article at Affair to cover the business and personal meaning of the word, and split off Extramarital affair with a disambig link and a "see also"? DWaterson 21:57, 7 February 2007 (UTC) reply

I second that. I think Affair should be about the Dreyfus-kind of affair, though and Love affair about the relationship. I don't think the title should imply that an affair has to be extramarital. I think this article has a too negative angle. An affair can be a beautiful thing. The only thing the term tells for sure is that the relationship has a fixed time range. It either lies in the past or is thought to be a temporary state. Graham Greene noted something like this in The End of the Affair. It should of course also be noted that the term is often a euphemism for the illicit kind of relationship. Bgp2000 13:02, 10 March 2007 (UTC) reply
I think the title is misleading as the article is mostly about an infidelity that differs from but is related to adultery. Infidelity which used to re-directs to Adultery and there-in lies a problem and perhaps a solution - I suggest merge this page and Emotional Affair with Infidelity. -- Ziji 23:41, 10 March 2007 (UTC) reply
If we're going to split these as Bgp2000 suggest, then can we first consider the title (addressed above) and carefully how and where to distinguish between it and Adultery, Affair, Emotional affair, Mistress (lover), Friendship, Monogamy, Incidence of Monogamy, Polyamory, Polygyny, Platonic love and Romantic friendship in a way that differentiates each and leads into related topics such as Intimate relationship, Intimacy, Emotional intimacy, Physical intimacy, and those topics like Age disparity in sexual relationships, Transactional sex, Enjo kōsai and the like. The area is spread out all over wikipedia and not always interlinked. One way to link it may be as part of the series on Love, to which some are already linked.-- Ziji 22:49, 10 March 2007 (UTC) reply

I have been working away at the Affair section and have added an Emotional Affair section to cover chaste infidelity. The Adultery article has the correct legal context and content and stands alone well. Affair is broader and if anything the genus of which adultery is but a species. From clinical experience as a psychologist, people rarely refer to adultery in Australia but frequently to affair to mean the same and related experiences. Indeed the opening question of this talk indicates the common usage. I agree with the above and add disambig links where necessary. I will continue to add content to Affair.-- Ziji 21:19, 21 February 2007 (UTC) reply

Emotional affair is now a separate article. With affair and emotional affair, this creates a core of 6 related articles including: Adultery, Infidelity, Office romance and Extramarital sex. I'm an expert in this field and so from my point of view there is a lot of overlap between them. On the Talk:Infidelity page there is a discussion about merging Affair into Infidelity. This is still an option but it's not going to leave a place in wikipedia for those affairs which are not a breach of faith. I think mergng Emotional affair into Affair might work but I think at the moment, the 6 articles stand alone and each can be improved separately. Any comments?-- Ziji ( talk email) 23:59, 5 September 2007 (UTC) reply

The article still seems a muddle to me, having been away from it for nearly two years, it hasn't improved much. I think all those related articles I listed above remain intact and as I said there, “The area is spread out all over wikipedia and not always interlinked. One way to link it may be as part of the series on Love, to which some are already linked“ is a job waiting to be done. -- Ziji ( talk email) 07:10, 25 January 2009 (UTC) reply

Extramarital Affair vs. Adultery

There is judgmental language throughout the entry, and especially under the Extramarital Affair heading. In that section, the descriptive material refocuses the topic from "affair" to "marriage" and "adultery." There are prejudicial and unsupported discretionary terms used, such as "infidelity," "illicit," "duplicitous," and "jilted." Rather than considering why an extraneous affair might occur during the tenure of a marriage or how it might be resolved, the section discusses cultural taboos and criminal and civil consequences of an affair. It's very much like discussing car crashes and traffic laws when the topic is the internal combustion engine. Parts of this entry are very moralizing and detrimental to an in-depth discussion of the topic, or, as in this section, any discussion at all. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Zanski ( talkcontribs) 23:53, 16 July 2017 (UTC) reply

Tagged

I've added the cleanup tag - mainly my gripe is with the Office romance section, which is poorly written and not encyclopaedic enough - "they can be intoxicating like a drug" and "Good people in good jobs will throw caution to the wind." etc. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by 137.108.145.11 ( talk) 15:52, 9 March 2007 (UTC). reply

I've moved Office romance into its own article.-- Ziji ( talk email) 23:10, 5 September 2007 (UTC) reply

Vandal

I have just removed an erroneous statement from the article Regarding George W Bush and Paris Hilton. For god's sake whoever added this garbage should show some respect for President Bush.

Spokenwordsegment ( talk) 22:30, 19 January 2008 (UTC) reply

Thanks for reverting! I've given the user a final warning. In future, you could if you wanted, add {{ blp1}} to the offending users talk page. Thanks again! Addhoc ( talk) 22:35, 19 January 2008 (UTC) reply
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Sure

You're welcome!

Shanekorte 05:50, 28 February 2006 (UTC) reply

May I attempt an answer to your question "is a kiss an affair?" One way to define infidelity is within the couple relationship whose psychological/emotional/spiritual contract is betrayed by that kiss. If you considered the kiss an affair and your partner did not, then you have a second order problem (over and above infidelity). That is the ability to communicate and form a flexible but binding agreement with each other that protects the relationship from temptation and trespass. Always check with your partner or future partner at the outset of the relationship what they and you mean by infidelity before you discover a breach of faith retrospectively.-- Ziji 00:41, 22 February 2007 (UTC) reply

Merged

Office romance merged as requested. SilkTork 22:47, 29 May 2006 (UTC) reply

Merge with Adultery

Anyone have any ideas what to do, if anything should be done, about merging these two articles since they overlap quite a bit. Albert109 17:39, 18 June 2006 (UTC) reply

Disagree with merge

Even though they overlap, there is no reason for a full merge. Affairs and adultry are two different things, although at first though they seem to be the same. Also, both articles are long enough to warrant having seperate wiki listings.

Instead, I submit that we remove the {merge} template.

I think this article should be an article referring to the different kinds of affairs, like the Danish one (which I am linking to in the "languages" section in the left menu). The Danish article links to love affairs and affairs like Dreyfus etc. The article being linked to under "Deutsch" (German) only covers love affairs, even though the German wikipedia also has an article simply called Affäre, similar to the Danish one. I think, the interwiki links in general should be pointing to the affair "overview" articles. Apopov ( talk) 17:28, 30 September 2008 (UTC) reply

Split article?

This article seems to be trying to cover two quite distinct meanings of the word "affair" and consequently has ended up as a confusing muddle. How about a split into Extramarital affair (which is already a redirect to this article) and Business affair? Or, alternatively, leave this article at Affair to cover the business and personal meaning of the word, and split off Extramarital affair with a disambig link and a "see also"? DWaterson 21:57, 7 February 2007 (UTC) reply

I second that. I think Affair should be about the Dreyfus-kind of affair, though and Love affair about the relationship. I don't think the title should imply that an affair has to be extramarital. I think this article has a too negative angle. An affair can be a beautiful thing. The only thing the term tells for sure is that the relationship has a fixed time range. It either lies in the past or is thought to be a temporary state. Graham Greene noted something like this in The End of the Affair. It should of course also be noted that the term is often a euphemism for the illicit kind of relationship. Bgp2000 13:02, 10 March 2007 (UTC) reply
I think the title is misleading as the article is mostly about an infidelity that differs from but is related to adultery. Infidelity which used to re-directs to Adultery and there-in lies a problem and perhaps a solution - I suggest merge this page and Emotional Affair with Infidelity. -- Ziji 23:41, 10 March 2007 (UTC) reply
If we're going to split these as Bgp2000 suggest, then can we first consider the title (addressed above) and carefully how and where to distinguish between it and Adultery, Affair, Emotional affair, Mistress (lover), Friendship, Monogamy, Incidence of Monogamy, Polyamory, Polygyny, Platonic love and Romantic friendship in a way that differentiates each and leads into related topics such as Intimate relationship, Intimacy, Emotional intimacy, Physical intimacy, and those topics like Age disparity in sexual relationships, Transactional sex, Enjo kōsai and the like. The area is spread out all over wikipedia and not always interlinked. One way to link it may be as part of the series on Love, to which some are already linked.-- Ziji 22:49, 10 March 2007 (UTC) reply

I have been working away at the Affair section and have added an Emotional Affair section to cover chaste infidelity. The Adultery article has the correct legal context and content and stands alone well. Affair is broader and if anything the genus of which adultery is but a species. From clinical experience as a psychologist, people rarely refer to adultery in Australia but frequently to affair to mean the same and related experiences. Indeed the opening question of this talk indicates the common usage. I agree with the above and add disambig links where necessary. I will continue to add content to Affair.-- Ziji 21:19, 21 February 2007 (UTC) reply

Emotional affair is now a separate article. With affair and emotional affair, this creates a core of 6 related articles including: Adultery, Infidelity, Office romance and Extramarital sex. I'm an expert in this field and so from my point of view there is a lot of overlap between them. On the Talk:Infidelity page there is a discussion about merging Affair into Infidelity. This is still an option but it's not going to leave a place in wikipedia for those affairs which are not a breach of faith. I think mergng Emotional affair into Affair might work but I think at the moment, the 6 articles stand alone and each can be improved separately. Any comments?-- Ziji ( talk email) 23:59, 5 September 2007 (UTC) reply

The article still seems a muddle to me, having been away from it for nearly two years, it hasn't improved much. I think all those related articles I listed above remain intact and as I said there, “The area is spread out all over wikipedia and not always interlinked. One way to link it may be as part of the series on Love, to which some are already linked“ is a job waiting to be done. -- Ziji ( talk email) 07:10, 25 January 2009 (UTC) reply

Extramarital Affair vs. Adultery

There is judgmental language throughout the entry, and especially under the Extramarital Affair heading. In that section, the descriptive material refocuses the topic from "affair" to "marriage" and "adultery." There are prejudicial and unsupported discretionary terms used, such as "infidelity," "illicit," "duplicitous," and "jilted." Rather than considering why an extraneous affair might occur during the tenure of a marriage or how it might be resolved, the section discusses cultural taboos and criminal and civil consequences of an affair. It's very much like discussing car crashes and traffic laws when the topic is the internal combustion engine. Parts of this entry are very moralizing and detrimental to an in-depth discussion of the topic, or, as in this section, any discussion at all. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Zanski ( talkcontribs) 23:53, 16 July 2017 (UTC) reply

Tagged

I've added the cleanup tag - mainly my gripe is with the Office romance section, which is poorly written and not encyclopaedic enough - "they can be intoxicating like a drug" and "Good people in good jobs will throw caution to the wind." etc. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by 137.108.145.11 ( talk) 15:52, 9 March 2007 (UTC). reply

I've moved Office romance into its own article.-- Ziji ( talk email) 23:10, 5 September 2007 (UTC) reply

Vandal

I have just removed an erroneous statement from the article Regarding George W Bush and Paris Hilton. For god's sake whoever added this garbage should show some respect for President Bush.

Spokenwordsegment ( talk) 22:30, 19 January 2008 (UTC) reply

Thanks for reverting! I've given the user a final warning. In future, you could if you wanted, add {{ blp1}} to the offending users talk page. Thanks again! Addhoc ( talk) 22:35, 19 January 2008 (UTC) reply

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