This article is within the scope of WikiProject Video games, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of
video games on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join
the discussion and see a list of open tasks.Video gamesWikipedia:WikiProject Video gamesTemplate:WikiProject Video gamesvideo game articles
"It was later ported to Amiga, Apple II, Atari ST and Atari 8-bit home computers in both the United Kingdom and the United States the following year. " -you don't need to say both later and the following year in the same sentence. You can remove "later".
" The feature can be displayed at any time, however it is automatically enabled if either side comes into conflict." -again I think however can be avoided.
Replaced with "though" JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
" The Bismarck is able to withstand 99 points of damage, however " -and again
"f fires occur, the player is given the option to order fire-fighting crews to contain the blaze, however" ;-)
Too many howevers! Rephrased JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
Background
"in what Cockayne admitted in a retrospective interview that" -awkward phrasing
Rephrased this JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
Reception
"A reviewer of Computer and Video Games said that the game was "historically good", however their only criticism was the unsuitability of using a joystick for the game, which was deemed "virtually unusable"." -would read better as "A reviewer of Computer and Video Games stated that the game was "historically good". Their only criticism was the unsuitability of using a joystick for the game, which they deemed "virtually unusable"."
Changed, thanks! JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
"Regarding the arcade aspect of the game, Rook noted that there was "certainly" enough action in it, but was sceptical if it was a "true" wargame.[1]" -don't need to quote "certainly", try wording it as "Regarding the arcade aspect of the game, Rook noted that the level of action in it was sufficient, but was skeptical that it was a "true" wargame."
Rephrased to the suggestion JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
@
Dr. Blofeld: thanks for the review! I think I've addressed everything, unless you had any other comments to make? Even though these articles are compact, I think they're surprisingly comprehensive for being 30 years old and made in people's bedrooms! It's surprising enough that these old video games have more coverage on reception than newer ones. Some anoraks out there! JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
This article is within the scope of WikiProject Video games, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of
video games on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join
the discussion and see a list of open tasks.Video gamesWikipedia:WikiProject Video gamesTemplate:WikiProject Video gamesvideo game articles
"It was later ported to Amiga, Apple II, Atari ST and Atari 8-bit home computers in both the United Kingdom and the United States the following year. " -you don't need to say both later and the following year in the same sentence. You can remove "later".
" The feature can be displayed at any time, however it is automatically enabled if either side comes into conflict." -again I think however can be avoided.
Replaced with "though" JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
" The Bismarck is able to withstand 99 points of damage, however " -and again
"f fires occur, the player is given the option to order fire-fighting crews to contain the blaze, however" ;-)
Too many howevers! Rephrased JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
Background
"in what Cockayne admitted in a retrospective interview that" -awkward phrasing
Rephrased this JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
Reception
"A reviewer of Computer and Video Games said that the game was "historically good", however their only criticism was the unsuitability of using a joystick for the game, which was deemed "virtually unusable"." -would read better as "A reviewer of Computer and Video Games stated that the game was "historically good". Their only criticism was the unsuitability of using a joystick for the game, which they deemed "virtually unusable"."
Changed, thanks! JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
"Regarding the arcade aspect of the game, Rook noted that there was "certainly" enough action in it, but was sceptical if it was a "true" wargame.[1]" -don't need to quote "certainly", try wording it as "Regarding the arcade aspect of the game, Rook noted that the level of action in it was sufficient, but was skeptical that it was a "true" wargame."
Rephrased to the suggestion JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply
@
Dr. Blofeld: thanks for the review! I think I've addressed everything, unless you had any other comments to make? Even though these articles are compact, I think they're surprisingly comprehensive for being 30 years old and made in people's bedrooms! It's surprising enough that these old video games have more coverage on reception than newer ones. Some anoraks out there! JAGUAR 14:58, 4 January 2016 (UTC)reply