"it was the town of 3,500's main employer prior to the disaster." – really needs to be reworded, as it isn't immediately obvious that "town of 3,500" is a phrase on its own
When you use measurements, like in "160 acre site and was spread across 872,000 square feet", use the {{convert}} template so that alt. measurements are shown.
"Explosion and emergency response" is made up of far too many small paragraphs; I recommend improving the flow and expanding or merging paragraphs appropriately.
There are some short paragraphs in " Aftermath". Perhaps they can be merged? For instance, "Port Wentworth saw an" and "In the first quarter of 2008" both discuss economics issues; they could be merged, perhaps. GaryKing (
talk)19:05, 28 June 2008 (UTC)reply
Again, I have restructured the section. I tried to group like topics together - demolition/reconstruction, economics and legal work. The exception was the emergency shutdown and fine; I stuck that with the first lot. Look OK?
Blood Red Sandman(Talk)(Contribs)21:19, 28 June 2008 (UTC)reply
"it was the town of 3,500's main employer prior to the disaster." – really needs to be reworded, as it isn't immediately obvious that "town of 3,500" is a phrase on its own
When you use measurements, like in "160 acre site and was spread across 872,000 square feet", use the {{convert}} template so that alt. measurements are shown.
"Explosion and emergency response" is made up of far too many small paragraphs; I recommend improving the flow and expanding or merging paragraphs appropriately.
There are some short paragraphs in " Aftermath". Perhaps they can be merged? For instance, "Port Wentworth saw an" and "In the first quarter of 2008" both discuss economics issues; they could be merged, perhaps. GaryKing (
talk)19:05, 28 June 2008 (UTC)reply
Again, I have restructured the section. I tried to group like topics together - demolition/reconstruction, economics and legal work. The exception was the emergency shutdown and fine; I stuck that with the first lot. Look OK?
Blood Red Sandman(Talk)(Contribs)21:19, 28 June 2008 (UTC)reply