A fact from Ümit Şamiloğlu appeared on Wikipedia's
Main Page in the Did you know column on 17 January 2021 (
check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as
this nomination's talk page,
the article's talk page or
Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
... that Turkish
artistic gymnastÜmit Şamiloğlu is the creator of a special
grip in the
horizontal bar event named after him? Source: "'The Şamiloğlu' hareketinin çıkış noktası şöyle; barfikste dünyanın bilinen bir sporcusuyum.", "Bir önceki başarısı, adına tescillenen ‘The Samiloglu’ hareketiydi." (in Turkish)[1]
New enough, long enough. However, I'm trying to read this and am having trouble understanding it. These sentences are run-on and hard to follow: He met Hasan Onmuş of
Dokuz Eylul University at Manisa (1982–1992) when his father was appointed from Ağrı to Manisa. Onmuş decided to send Şamiloğlu following a physical test to
Bolu, the center of gymnastics in Turkey under coaching of world's best Soviet trainers, who came following the
Dissolution of the Soviet Union. This one doesn't make sense: Together with his coach, Şamiloğlu developed from a simple grip a repeatable and not so difficult grip preferable by high-level gymnasts. Usually I can edit your work, but I'm having trouble understanding it. Maybe you should apply to
WP:GOCE?
It's also unclear what kind of a grip you're talking about. In the lead you link it to
Grip (gymnastics), but in the body it's linked to
Horizontal bar#Grips. The way you describe it, it sounds like it's something he carries with him, not just the way he holds his hands. This needs more explanation to make it clearer to the reader.
I added tag to unclear words or statements that need citations.
Thank you very much for your review. Before applying to copyeditors guild, I copyedited the parts you mentioned as hard to understand, in error and lacking citation. Maybe, I could make it easier to understand. Can you re-check, please.
CeeGee12:18, 7 January 2021 (UTC)reply
@
CeeGee: thank you; now I understood the text better and gave it a thorough copyedit. Please review. There are still some tags in the Private life section to take care of, including the cite for his birthdate.
Yoninah (
talk)
17:09, 7 January 2021 (UTC)reply
Article style still reads more like simple wiki, but it's clear. The hook has the same kind of phrasing issue, but it's interesting and sourced. The "grip" issue also seems resolved, as it's clear it's referring to a hand-hold. Seems suitable.
Kingsif (
talk)
13:27, 12 January 2021 (UTC)reply
Thanks,
Kingsif. Would it work to shorten the hook?
A fact from Ümit Şamiloğlu appeared on Wikipedia's
Main Page in the Did you know column on 17 January 2021 (
check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
This article must adhere to the biographies of living persons (BLP) policy, even if it is not a biography, because it contains material about living persons. Contentious material about living persons that is unsourced or
poorly sourcedmust be removed immediately from the article and its talk page, especially if potentially
libellous. If such material is repeatedly inserted, or if you have other concerns, please report the issue to
this noticeboard.If you are a subject of this article, or acting on behalf of one, and you need help, please see this help page.
This article is rated Start-class on Wikipedia's
content assessment scale. It is of interest to the following
WikiProjects:
This article is within the scope of WikiProject Biography, a collaborative effort to create, develop and organize Wikipedia's articles about people. All interested editors are invited to
join the project and
contribute to the discussion. For instructions on how to use this banner, please refer to the
documentation.BiographyWikipedia:WikiProject BiographyTemplate:WikiProject Biographybiography articles
This article is within the scope of WikiProject Turkey, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of
Turkey and
related topics on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join
the discussion and see a list of open tasks.TurkeyWikipedia:WikiProject TurkeyTemplate:WikiProject TurkeyTurkey articles
This article is within the scope of WikiProject Gymnastics, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of
Gymnastics on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join
the discussion and see a list of open tasks.GymnasticsWikipedia:WikiProject GymnasticsTemplate:WikiProject GymnasticsGymnastics articles
The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as
this nomination's talk page,
the article's talk page or
Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
... that Turkish
artistic gymnastÜmit Şamiloğlu is the creator of a special
grip in the
horizontal bar event named after him? Source: "'The Şamiloğlu' hareketinin çıkış noktası şöyle; barfikste dünyanın bilinen bir sporcusuyum.", "Bir önceki başarısı, adına tescillenen ‘The Samiloglu’ hareketiydi." (in Turkish)[1]
New enough, long enough. However, I'm trying to read this and am having trouble understanding it. These sentences are run-on and hard to follow: He met Hasan Onmuş of
Dokuz Eylul University at Manisa (1982–1992) when his father was appointed from Ağrı to Manisa. Onmuş decided to send Şamiloğlu following a physical test to
Bolu, the center of gymnastics in Turkey under coaching of world's best Soviet trainers, who came following the
Dissolution of the Soviet Union. This one doesn't make sense: Together with his coach, Şamiloğlu developed from a simple grip a repeatable and not so difficult grip preferable by high-level gymnasts. Usually I can edit your work, but I'm having trouble understanding it. Maybe you should apply to
WP:GOCE?
It's also unclear what kind of a grip you're talking about. In the lead you link it to
Grip (gymnastics), but in the body it's linked to
Horizontal bar#Grips. The way you describe it, it sounds like it's something he carries with him, not just the way he holds his hands. This needs more explanation to make it clearer to the reader.
I added tag to unclear words or statements that need citations.
Thank you very much for your review. Before applying to copyeditors guild, I copyedited the parts you mentioned as hard to understand, in error and lacking citation. Maybe, I could make it easier to understand. Can you re-check, please.
CeeGee12:18, 7 January 2021 (UTC)reply
@
CeeGee: thank you; now I understood the text better and gave it a thorough copyedit. Please review. There are still some tags in the Private life section to take care of, including the cite for his birthdate.
Yoninah (
talk)
17:09, 7 January 2021 (UTC)reply
Article style still reads more like simple wiki, but it's clear. The hook has the same kind of phrasing issue, but it's interesting and sourced. The "grip" issue also seems resolved, as it's clear it's referring to a hand-hold. Seems suitable.
Kingsif (
talk)
13:27, 12 January 2021 (UTC)reply
Thanks,
Kingsif. Would it work to shorten the hook?