Article worked up from stub, I think it now meets the criteria for A-Class, your comments and criticisms welcome. Carom 19:41, 26 April 2007 (UTC) reply
Carom, I just re-worked the intro section for you and Balloonman. Let me know what you think. And again, having perused the rest of the article, I see that the South Africans and Newfies were in this, too. I suggest avoiding an overly British Empire POV and giving them credit, too. And for the flag box, I'd give equal status to the Can. and Oz flags (independent nations then and at Versailles) with the UK. Newfoundland was a self-governing part, so its green-white-pink flag could be under the Empire. Not sure about SA status back then. Hope I've helped a bit. Esseh 08:02, 29 April 2007 (UTC) reply
Hi Carom, glad you liked it. (Someone ought to tell Balloonman, so he can pick on something else ;). I saw you took out the "Great War" at the end. I know it was redundant to the 1st sentence, but I've always been surprised how many kids have no idea WW I was called that. (And I thought it ended with a bit of literary flair - or licence?) As for the flags, well... I'll leave it to you. With that in mind, size is a relative thing. What was a small part of the Allied effort overall was a huge part of, say, the NFLD population. Also, size doesn't necessarily reflect ability. The Canadian Corps was what, 4 Div at its heighth, but with the Aussies, they became the "shock troops of the Empire". You are right about bloat, though. Maybe just flagless bullet points (or one listing all) beneath the UK for NF, SA (and the Kiwis?, or were they still part of the ANZACs?) Just my thoughts. Again, I tend to err on the side of "credit where it's due and damn the bloat.... but that's me. All the best.
Esseh
15:51, 29 April 2007 (UTC)
reply
Article worked up from stub, I think it now meets the criteria for A-Class, your comments and criticisms welcome. Carom 19:41, 26 April 2007 (UTC) reply
Carom, I just re-worked the intro section for you and Balloonman. Let me know what you think. And again, having perused the rest of the article, I see that the South Africans and Newfies were in this, too. I suggest avoiding an overly British Empire POV and giving them credit, too. And for the flag box, I'd give equal status to the Can. and Oz flags (independent nations then and at Versailles) with the UK. Newfoundland was a self-governing part, so its green-white-pink flag could be under the Empire. Not sure about SA status back then. Hope I've helped a bit. Esseh 08:02, 29 April 2007 (UTC) reply
Hi Carom, glad you liked it. (Someone ought to tell Balloonman, so he can pick on something else ;). I saw you took out the "Great War" at the end. I know it was redundant to the 1st sentence, but I've always been surprised how many kids have no idea WW I was called that. (And I thought it ended with a bit of literary flair - or licence?) As for the flags, well... I'll leave it to you. With that in mind, size is a relative thing. What was a small part of the Allied effort overall was a huge part of, say, the NFLD population. Also, size doesn't necessarily reflect ability. The Canadian Corps was what, 4 Div at its heighth, but with the Aussies, they became the "shock troops of the Empire". You are right about bloat, though. Maybe just flagless bullet points (or one listing all) beneath the UK for NF, SA (and the Kiwis?, or were they still part of the ANZACs?) Just my thoughts. Again, I tend to err on the side of "credit where it's due and damn the bloat.... but that's me. All the best.
Esseh
15:51, 29 April 2007 (UTC)
reply