A script has been used to generate a semi-
automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and
house style; it can be found on the
automated peer review page for May 2009.
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I want to promote it to
WP:GA. I have alread promoted a couple other country music band articles to good-article and followed pretty much the same basic blueprint for this one. In fact, it easily has more sources than either, so I think it might have more of a chance. I would like more suggestions as to what else I should change before sending it to
WP:GAN.
Finetooth comments: This looks pretty good to me. It's broad in its coverage, neutral, stable, and seems factually accurate and verifiable. I made some minor proofing changes, and I have some suggestions about prose and Manual of Style issues as well as one thought about images. Since we were both working on the article today, I used strikeouts to indicate the suggestions you have responded to already.
Lead
"The original Itchy Brother lineup was reunited for 1993's Rave On!! and a compilation album before the band exited Mercury." - Wikilink
compilation album on first use?
Do you need the terminal period after CBuJ? Its web site doesn't seem to use it.
Done. Brain fart on my part.
History
"Fred joined RCA Records artist Sylvia's road band... " - This might be too many modifiers in front of "band". Suggestion: "Fred joined the road band of Sylvia, an RCA Records artist... "
Musical career
"The band took its new name from "headchopper", a word that blues musician Muddy Waters used to indicate that he had supplanted another band in a gig." - It might be good to add the new name to this sentence. Suggestion: "The band took its new name, The Kentucky Headhunters, from "headchopper", a word that blues musician Muddy Waters used to indicate that he had supplanted another band in a gig.
"Mercury Records signed the band in 1989 through the assistance of record producer Harold Shedd." - Suggestion: Mercury Records, assisted by record producer Harold Shedd, signed the band in 1989.
He also said that the label was reluctant to release the song as a single." - I can't be sure who "he" refers to. It might be Greg Martin, or it might be Fox.
"...due to its high local influence." - Does this mean that the record company thought it might not sell well except to a local (Nashville?) audience? Was the liquor store in Nashville?
"with none of its four singles reaching Top 40 on the U.S. country charts" - Insert "the" between "reaching" and "Top 40"?
"Its first singles release was a cover of The Ballad of Davy Crockett... - Wikilink
cover on first use?
Both done. Cover is already wikilinked earlier in the article.
Rave On!!
"The album sold poorly, despite support from the band's touring with then-labelmate
Billy Ray Cyrus." - Suggestion: "Although the band drew attention by touring with then-labelmate
Billy Ray Cyrus, the album sold poorly."
Done.
Songs from the Grass String Ranch and Soul
"Unlike with their previous albums, the band decided to record entirely original songs for Songs from the Grass String Ranch." - Suggestion: Changing methods, the band decided to record entirely original songs for Songs from the Grass String Ranch.
"All five members co-wrote all of its songs, with four also being co-written by Verlon Dale Grissom." - Suggestion: All five members co-wrote the songs with assistance from Verlon Dale Grissom on four of the songs.
Done and done.
Work with other artists
"as part of the side project The Mighty Jeremiahs" - Italics for The Mighty Jeremiahs?
Done.
Musical styles
"The band's combination of styles is most notable in their cover song choices on their early albums, with all three Mercury albums containing a Bill Monroe cover, and other covers ranging from Waylon Jennings to The Lovin' Spoonful to Carl Perkins." - "Band" is singular, but "their" is plural. Also, the "with + containing" clause is probably not the strongest construction here. Suggestion: The band's combination of styles is most notable in its cover-song choices on early albums. All three Mercury albums contain a Bill Monroe cover and other covers ranging from Waylon Jennings to The Lovin' Spoonful to Carl Perkins.
"Their original compositions often take a regional theme, with the single "Dumas Walker" being a notable example." - Suggestion: The band's original compositions, such as the single "Dumas Walker", often develop a regional theme."
"At their peak in the early 1990s, The Kentucky Headhunters was considered... " - "At its peak" rather than "at their peak"?
"due to the significant mainstream attention that their works received despite the band's rougher sound" - "Its" rather than "their"? Alternatively, "due to the significant mainstream attention that the band's works received despite its rougher sound"?
All done.
Images
As others have noted, the infobox lacks an image. If no free images can be found, it might be better to add a fair-use image of an album cover to the infobox than to use the one in the history section.
The source link for
Image:Itchy.jpg is circular. It gives no way for fact-checkers to examine the source image in context to make sure the license is OK. The fix for this problem is to track down the source page and provide a link to its url rather than to the image by itself out of context.
As I have said on Finetooth's talk page, I have contacted Greg Martin, and he has agreed to submit a photo to Wikipedia. Ten Pound Hammer, his otters and a clue-bat • (
Many otters •
One bat •
One hammer)01:41, 7 June 2009 (UTC)reply
References
The page numbers in the citations should be indicated by "p." if a single page and a "'pp." if more than one page. To produce "p.", set the "pages" parameter in the "cite book" citation to "|page" rather than "|pages". I did this for citation 5, but I see others that need fixing.
Done.
I hope these suggestions prove helpful. If so, please consider reviewing another article, especially one from the PR backlog. That is where I found this one.
Finetooth (
talk)
01:15, 7 June 2009 (UTC)reply
A script has been used to generate a semi-
automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and
house style; it can be found on the
automated peer review page for May 2009.
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I want to promote it to
WP:GA. I have alread promoted a couple other country music band articles to good-article and followed pretty much the same basic blueprint for this one. In fact, it easily has more sources than either, so I think it might have more of a chance. I would like more suggestions as to what else I should change before sending it to
WP:GAN.
Finetooth comments: This looks pretty good to me. It's broad in its coverage, neutral, stable, and seems factually accurate and verifiable. I made some minor proofing changes, and I have some suggestions about prose and Manual of Style issues as well as one thought about images. Since we were both working on the article today, I used strikeouts to indicate the suggestions you have responded to already.
Lead
"The original Itchy Brother lineup was reunited for 1993's Rave On!! and a compilation album before the band exited Mercury." - Wikilink
compilation album on first use?
Do you need the terminal period after CBuJ? Its web site doesn't seem to use it.
Done. Brain fart on my part.
History
"Fred joined RCA Records artist Sylvia's road band... " - This might be too many modifiers in front of "band". Suggestion: "Fred joined the road band of Sylvia, an RCA Records artist... "
Musical career
"The band took its new name from "headchopper", a word that blues musician Muddy Waters used to indicate that he had supplanted another band in a gig." - It might be good to add the new name to this sentence. Suggestion: "The band took its new name, The Kentucky Headhunters, from "headchopper", a word that blues musician Muddy Waters used to indicate that he had supplanted another band in a gig.
"Mercury Records signed the band in 1989 through the assistance of record producer Harold Shedd." - Suggestion: Mercury Records, assisted by record producer Harold Shedd, signed the band in 1989.
He also said that the label was reluctant to release the song as a single." - I can't be sure who "he" refers to. It might be Greg Martin, or it might be Fox.
"...due to its high local influence." - Does this mean that the record company thought it might not sell well except to a local (Nashville?) audience? Was the liquor store in Nashville?
"with none of its four singles reaching Top 40 on the U.S. country charts" - Insert "the" between "reaching" and "Top 40"?
"Its first singles release was a cover of The Ballad of Davy Crockett... - Wikilink
cover on first use?
Both done. Cover is already wikilinked earlier in the article.
Rave On!!
"The album sold poorly, despite support from the band's touring with then-labelmate
Billy Ray Cyrus." - Suggestion: "Although the band drew attention by touring with then-labelmate
Billy Ray Cyrus, the album sold poorly."
Done.
Songs from the Grass String Ranch and Soul
"Unlike with their previous albums, the band decided to record entirely original songs for Songs from the Grass String Ranch." - Suggestion: Changing methods, the band decided to record entirely original songs for Songs from the Grass String Ranch.
"All five members co-wrote all of its songs, with four also being co-written by Verlon Dale Grissom." - Suggestion: All five members co-wrote the songs with assistance from Verlon Dale Grissom on four of the songs.
Done and done.
Work with other artists
"as part of the side project The Mighty Jeremiahs" - Italics for The Mighty Jeremiahs?
Done.
Musical styles
"The band's combination of styles is most notable in their cover song choices on their early albums, with all three Mercury albums containing a Bill Monroe cover, and other covers ranging from Waylon Jennings to The Lovin' Spoonful to Carl Perkins." - "Band" is singular, but "their" is plural. Also, the "with + containing" clause is probably not the strongest construction here. Suggestion: The band's combination of styles is most notable in its cover-song choices on early albums. All three Mercury albums contain a Bill Monroe cover and other covers ranging from Waylon Jennings to The Lovin' Spoonful to Carl Perkins.
"Their original compositions often take a regional theme, with the single "Dumas Walker" being a notable example." - Suggestion: The band's original compositions, such as the single "Dumas Walker", often develop a regional theme."
"At their peak in the early 1990s, The Kentucky Headhunters was considered... " - "At its peak" rather than "at their peak"?
"due to the significant mainstream attention that their works received despite the band's rougher sound" - "Its" rather than "their"? Alternatively, "due to the significant mainstream attention that the band's works received despite its rougher sound"?
All done.
Images
As others have noted, the infobox lacks an image. If no free images can be found, it might be better to add a fair-use image of an album cover to the infobox than to use the one in the history section.
The source link for
Image:Itchy.jpg is circular. It gives no way for fact-checkers to examine the source image in context to make sure the license is OK. The fix for this problem is to track down the source page and provide a link to its url rather than to the image by itself out of context.
As I have said on Finetooth's talk page, I have contacted Greg Martin, and he has agreed to submit a photo to Wikipedia. Ten Pound Hammer, his otters and a clue-bat • (
Many otters •
One bat •
One hammer)01:41, 7 June 2009 (UTC)reply
References
The page numbers in the citations should be indicated by "p." if a single page and a "'pp." if more than one page. To produce "p.", set the "pages" parameter in the "cite book" citation to "|page" rather than "|pages". I did this for citation 5, but I see others that need fixing.
Done.
I hope these suggestions prove helpful. If so, please consider reviewing another article, especially one from the PR backlog. That is where I found this one.
Finetooth (
talk)
01:15, 7 June 2009 (UTC)reply