I would appreciate any comments about any section of the article, or the article as a whole. I would hope to elevate this article up to GA status, and possibly even FA. Sr13(
T|C) ER 05:32, 24 April 2007 (UTC)reply
First review
Lead is way too big - it should be a brief summary of the article, not several paragraphs.
Listing of all the buildings on campus is completely unnecessary. Remove or move to it's own page.
Done Removed listing. Sr13(
T|C) ER 08:09, 27 April 2007 (UTC)reply
List of notable alums is to the size that it's probably ready to be it's own article.
Done I don't think that the alums deserve their own article, but I cut them down to size. Sr13(
T|C) ER 08:09, 27 April 2007 (UTC)reply
Look around at other articles on similar schools and universities and emulate the good examples.
I'll further check-up to the writing once those are addressed.
Michaelas10 17:14, 30 April 2007 (UTC)reply
Third review
The section on Case Middle School is disproportionately large. I suggest spinning it off as its own article (since it has an adequate number of cites), and then just having a two-paragraph summary in the article.
By contrast, there seems to be no description of the campus (size? number of buildings? organization) or other components (does the high school have a name? lower schools?)
This is a 501 c (3) organization, yes? So why not a link to their annual financial form (990) filed with the IRS? And a bit of info from that (e.g., annual revenues, size of endowment)?
The subsections in the "Athletics" section dominate the table of contents. I suggest using semicolons to bold what otherwise would be subsections. (There really ought to be two only two true subsection headings: "Programs" and "Olympians".)
The "history and traditions" section combines two disparate things; I suggest an "Other" section with info on events ("traditions" really relates to culture, not a school, I'd argue, but that's a very minor point), the asteroid, and other things that don't fit elsewhere, with an expanded history section (see next point).
The "History" section most definitely needs to be greatly expanded: what happened between 1842 and the point where Steve Case (and please remove the "Because of his love" phrase; that is an absolutely, completely unverifiable phrase - unless he hooked up to a lie detector or given truth serum, and then only if you believe either of those really works) gave $10 million? Clearly the school expanded - when, how, why?
Does the school have any particular teaching philosophy or approach? Has this changed over the years? Was it a pioneer in anything (co-ed education, girls in sports, whatever)?
The following suggestions were generated by a semi-automatic
javascript program, and might not be applicable for the article in question.
The lead of this article may be too long, or may contain too many paragraphs. Please follow guidelines at
WP:LEAD; be aware that the lead should adequately summarize the article.[?]
The lead is for summarizing the rest of the article, and should not introduce new topics not discussed in the rest of the article, as per
WP:LEAD. Please ensure that the lead adequately summarizes the article.[?]
I would appreciate any comments about any section of the article, or the article as a whole. I would hope to elevate this article up to GA status, and possibly even FA. Sr13(
T|C) ER 05:32, 24 April 2007 (UTC)reply
First review
Lead is way too big - it should be a brief summary of the article, not several paragraphs.
Listing of all the buildings on campus is completely unnecessary. Remove or move to it's own page.
Done Removed listing. Sr13(
T|C) ER 08:09, 27 April 2007 (UTC)reply
List of notable alums is to the size that it's probably ready to be it's own article.
Done I don't think that the alums deserve their own article, but I cut them down to size. Sr13(
T|C) ER 08:09, 27 April 2007 (UTC)reply
Look around at other articles on similar schools and universities and emulate the good examples.
I'll further check-up to the writing once those are addressed.
Michaelas10 17:14, 30 April 2007 (UTC)reply
Third review
The section on Case Middle School is disproportionately large. I suggest spinning it off as its own article (since it has an adequate number of cites), and then just having a two-paragraph summary in the article.
By contrast, there seems to be no description of the campus (size? number of buildings? organization) or other components (does the high school have a name? lower schools?)
This is a 501 c (3) organization, yes? So why not a link to their annual financial form (990) filed with the IRS? And a bit of info from that (e.g., annual revenues, size of endowment)?
The subsections in the "Athletics" section dominate the table of contents. I suggest using semicolons to bold what otherwise would be subsections. (There really ought to be two only two true subsection headings: "Programs" and "Olympians".)
The "history and traditions" section combines two disparate things; I suggest an "Other" section with info on events ("traditions" really relates to culture, not a school, I'd argue, but that's a very minor point), the asteroid, and other things that don't fit elsewhere, with an expanded history section (see next point).
The "History" section most definitely needs to be greatly expanded: what happened between 1842 and the point where Steve Case (and please remove the "Because of his love" phrase; that is an absolutely, completely unverifiable phrase - unless he hooked up to a lie detector or given truth serum, and then only if you believe either of those really works) gave $10 million? Clearly the school expanded - when, how, why?
Does the school have any particular teaching philosophy or approach? Has this changed over the years? Was it a pioneer in anything (co-ed education, girls in sports, whatever)?
The following suggestions were generated by a semi-automatic
javascript program, and might not be applicable for the article in question.
The lead of this article may be too long, or may contain too many paragraphs. Please follow guidelines at
WP:LEAD; be aware that the lead should adequately summarize the article.[?]
The lead is for summarizing the rest of the article, and should not introduce new topics not discussed in the rest of the article, as per
WP:LEAD. Please ensure that the lead adequately summarizes the article.[?]