A script has been used to generate a semi-
automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and
house style; it can be found on the
automated peer review page for July 2008.
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because of the recent promotion to good article status and on suggestion by the reviewer to pursue featured article status. Hopefully some good input can be provided to further refine and improve the article. Thanks!
Mvjs (
talk)
12:09, 31 July 2008 (UTC)reply
Giggy
I very vaguely recall there being more than one "main" airport in Melbourne (I lived near Tullamarine for a short time and I always thought there was another big one somewhere far away... but then I was 9 so yeah...). Am I totally wrong? If not, can there be a link to it in the hatnote?
I'm not sure if I like the fact that the article starts off with a stack of statistics... I prefer
Sydney Airport's first few sentences; thoughts?
"The airport is located 25 kilometres (16 mi) northwest of the Melbourne city centre and has its own suburb boundaries with the area officially named Melbourne Airport, adjacent to the suburb of Tullamarine and has the postcode 3045" - this sentence needs some work... (try reading it aloud)
Is the flying of the
A380 at Melbourne such a big deal that it warrants its own section?
I believe so, there's major terminal modifications happening to accommodate the aircraft and this aircraft beginning commercial service at the airport is an important mark in the airports history. I don't like to participate in the "me too" mentality but Singapore Changi has a section on
accommodating the A380.
The refs in the Traffic and statistics table seem to get overlapped by the header text... not sure what to do about it, but yeah...
"and the noise from jet operations made Essendon an unsuitable site." - this is a bit awkward considering there's already an airport at Essendon (or so you write...)...
"The first domestic flight landed on June 26, 1971[12] and also that year, the first landing of the Boeing 747." - this sentence is a bit choppy midway through, play around with the commas and see if you can make it flow better.
"Melbourne Airport was originally called Tullamarine Airport and locals still commonly refer to it by that name or simply as Tulla." - source? (And for the rest of this paragraph.)
Added a few references to that paragraph. I cannot find an exact reference stating "Tullamarine Airport is now known as Melbourne Airport".
Mvjs (
talk)
11:49, 7 August 2008 (UTC)reply
Yeah, took a look at a few random paragraphs of prose; an independant copyedit would be a good idea before FAC.
A script has been used to generate a semi-
automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and
house style; it can be found on the
automated peer review page for July 2008.
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because of the recent promotion to good article status and on suggestion by the reviewer to pursue featured article status. Hopefully some good input can be provided to further refine and improve the article. Thanks!
Mvjs (
talk)
12:09, 31 July 2008 (UTC)reply
Giggy
I very vaguely recall there being more than one "main" airport in Melbourne (I lived near Tullamarine for a short time and I always thought there was another big one somewhere far away... but then I was 9 so yeah...). Am I totally wrong? If not, can there be a link to it in the hatnote?
I'm not sure if I like the fact that the article starts off with a stack of statistics... I prefer
Sydney Airport's first few sentences; thoughts?
"The airport is located 25 kilometres (16 mi) northwest of the Melbourne city centre and has its own suburb boundaries with the area officially named Melbourne Airport, adjacent to the suburb of Tullamarine and has the postcode 3045" - this sentence needs some work... (try reading it aloud)
Is the flying of the
A380 at Melbourne such a big deal that it warrants its own section?
I believe so, there's major terminal modifications happening to accommodate the aircraft and this aircraft beginning commercial service at the airport is an important mark in the airports history. I don't like to participate in the "me too" mentality but Singapore Changi has a section on
accommodating the A380.
The refs in the Traffic and statistics table seem to get overlapped by the header text... not sure what to do about it, but yeah...
"and the noise from jet operations made Essendon an unsuitable site." - this is a bit awkward considering there's already an airport at Essendon (or so you write...)...
"The first domestic flight landed on June 26, 1971[12] and also that year, the first landing of the Boeing 747." - this sentence is a bit choppy midway through, play around with the commas and see if you can make it flow better.
"Melbourne Airport was originally called Tullamarine Airport and locals still commonly refer to it by that name or simply as Tulla." - source? (And for the rest of this paragraph.)
Added a few references to that paragraph. I cannot find an exact reference stating "Tullamarine Airport is now known as Melbourne Airport".
Mvjs (
talk)
11:49, 7 August 2008 (UTC)reply
Yeah, took a look at a few random paragraphs of prose; an independant copyedit would be a good idea before FAC.