Toolbox |
---|
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I, along with
Kailash29792 and
Ssven2, am aiming to bring
Mayabazar to FA status upon a suggestion by
Dr. Blofeld. Mayabazar happens to be my first attempt at a FA, second for Ssven2 and third for Kailash29792.
Thanks,
Pavanjandhyala (
talk)
04:13, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
|language=Telugu
in the cite templates.-- Skr15081997 ( talk) 05:00, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
-- Skr15081997 ( talk) 09:15, 6 June 2015 (UTC)
For the Telugu language titles in the references, you have used the corresponding English title in braces. Please use the trans_title parameter in the citation where it should be ideally placed. — Indian:BIO [ ChitChat ] 07:06, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
Hi bro, why dont you add details in popular culture for instance please check out the Telugu films in which the songs from this film has been parodied. "Vivaha Bhojanambu" was reused in animation film Ghatothkacha. Not only Aha Naa Pellanta, even other songs were also named as films. Srivin ( talk) 07:37, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
Prose will need a close review before FAC. For example, the last paragraph of the lead says: "The Telugu version's digitally remastered and colourised version was released on 30 January 2010. It too was successful both critically and commercially." Two things: first, the repetition of "Telugu version's...colourised verison" should be removed. There are any number of ways to do this. You could say, "The digitally remastered and colourised Telugu version was released" or something along those lines; second, the last sentence would work better merged with the previous. Something like this: "The digitally remastered and colourised Telugu version was released on 30 January 2010 and was critically and commercially successful." Viriditas ( talk) 06:28, 4 June 2015 (UTC)
Lead section:
I am afraid this would get killed at FAC. You need to have it copy edited first. BollyJeff | talk 13:42, 8 June 2015 (UTC)
Just noting some prose concerns I can find along the way:
I'll try and find more as I go along. JAG UAR 14:10, 8 June 2015 (UTC)
The fact about the film becoming the first Telgu film to be colorised and digitally mastered would be of point of interest to many readers,it should perhaps be mentioned earlier in the article. -- Artscribbler ( talk) 19:45, 25 June 2015 (UTC)
Dear Mr.,
First, I thank you for your work about Mayabazar that talks about a Tamil Classical Film. However, you had missed some important details. In fact, you had only talked about the expenses of the film. You did not talk about its income... Furthermore, the abbreviation of INR is not supported by computers... So, try to write INR instead of ₹. Try to expand this... This will better the output of your excellent work. Moreover, you had not well described the places where the scenes had been done and how the fees had been allocated for the Mayabazar film and you had not well estimated the value of Roubie in USD so that the users can get a better overviews of the material expenses of the film.
Yours Sincerely,
-- Csisc ( talk) 21:29, 27 June 2015 (UTC)
I'll make most of the minor edits myself, but I feel that the Themes section isn't of FA quality. It's so weak in fact that it tells me nothing about themes but reiterates the plot scenario, rendering it redundant. Is there no way you can further develop it to read as more scholarly?♦ Dr. Blofeld 06:59, 7 August 2015 (UTC)
Overall I'm of the opinion that the prose isn't up to FA quality yet. It does read as a bit sketchy and lacks the finesse of a higher end article throughout. I think it needs a considerable copyedit by a few people before it heads to FAC. @ RHM22: and @ SandyGeorgia: are usually excellent commentators on that aspect, so requesting their input.♦ Dr. Blofeld 07:05, 7 August 2015 (UTC)
Toolbox |
---|
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I, along with
Kailash29792 and
Ssven2, am aiming to bring
Mayabazar to FA status upon a suggestion by
Dr. Blofeld. Mayabazar happens to be my first attempt at a FA, second for Ssven2 and third for Kailash29792.
Thanks,
Pavanjandhyala (
talk)
04:13, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
|language=Telugu
in the cite templates.-- Skr15081997 ( talk) 05:00, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
-- Skr15081997 ( talk) 09:15, 6 June 2015 (UTC)
For the Telugu language titles in the references, you have used the corresponding English title in braces. Please use the trans_title parameter in the citation where it should be ideally placed. — Indian:BIO [ ChitChat ] 07:06, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
Hi bro, why dont you add details in popular culture for instance please check out the Telugu films in which the songs from this film has been parodied. "Vivaha Bhojanambu" was reused in animation film Ghatothkacha. Not only Aha Naa Pellanta, even other songs were also named as films. Srivin ( talk) 07:37, 3 June 2015 (UTC)
Prose will need a close review before FAC. For example, the last paragraph of the lead says: "The Telugu version's digitally remastered and colourised version was released on 30 January 2010. It too was successful both critically and commercially." Two things: first, the repetition of "Telugu version's...colourised verison" should be removed. There are any number of ways to do this. You could say, "The digitally remastered and colourised Telugu version was released" or something along those lines; second, the last sentence would work better merged with the previous. Something like this: "The digitally remastered and colourised Telugu version was released on 30 January 2010 and was critically and commercially successful." Viriditas ( talk) 06:28, 4 June 2015 (UTC)
Lead section:
I am afraid this would get killed at FAC. You need to have it copy edited first. BollyJeff | talk 13:42, 8 June 2015 (UTC)
Just noting some prose concerns I can find along the way:
I'll try and find more as I go along. JAG UAR 14:10, 8 June 2015 (UTC)
The fact about the film becoming the first Telgu film to be colorised and digitally mastered would be of point of interest to many readers,it should perhaps be mentioned earlier in the article. -- Artscribbler ( talk) 19:45, 25 June 2015 (UTC)
Dear Mr.,
First, I thank you for your work about Mayabazar that talks about a Tamil Classical Film. However, you had missed some important details. In fact, you had only talked about the expenses of the film. You did not talk about its income... Furthermore, the abbreviation of INR is not supported by computers... So, try to write INR instead of ₹. Try to expand this... This will better the output of your excellent work. Moreover, you had not well described the places where the scenes had been done and how the fees had been allocated for the Mayabazar film and you had not well estimated the value of Roubie in USD so that the users can get a better overviews of the material expenses of the film.
Yours Sincerely,
-- Csisc ( talk) 21:29, 27 June 2015 (UTC)
I'll make most of the minor edits myself, but I feel that the Themes section isn't of FA quality. It's so weak in fact that it tells me nothing about themes but reiterates the plot scenario, rendering it redundant. Is there no way you can further develop it to read as more scholarly?♦ Dr. Blofeld 06:59, 7 August 2015 (UTC)
Overall I'm of the opinion that the prose isn't up to FA quality yet. It does read as a bit sketchy and lacks the finesse of a higher end article throughout. I think it needs a considerable copyedit by a few people before it heads to FAC. @ RHM22: and @ SandyGeorgia: are usually excellent commentators on that aspect, so requesting their input.♦ Dr. Blofeld 07:05, 7 August 2015 (UTC)