This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I am planning to submit this for GA, possibly FA.
Thanks, Starczamora ( talk) 09:18, 28 February 2008 (UTC)
Ruhrfisch comments: this is pretty close to GA or eventual FA as it is. Here are some more suggestions:
- The lead should follow WP:LEAD and summarize the article, as well as not add any facts not in the body of the article.
- Needs a copyedit, especially for punctuation.
- I know he used commas in his poetry, but He was, awarded, the National Artist of the Philippines title... should read He was awarded the National Artist of the Philippines title....
- Spelling is odd - some in quotes, so please double check those (copyedit and proof read). Examples He is known to have introduced the "reversed consonance rime scheme" in writing poetry,... should be " rhyme" ( rime is a kind of ice). Or "The commas are an integral and essential part of the medium: regulating the poem's verbal density and time movement: enabling each word to attain a fuller tonal value, and the line movement to become more measures."[4] - the last word does not fit, perhaps it is supposed to be measured instead?
- Early life, Personal and Death sections are all very short - could they be combined into a single section? Also tense is odd - in Death it says He also has three grandchildren. but he is dead, so he can't be present tense ("had", not "has")
- Images are decent, references seem OK. Good article which needs a little polish,
Hope this helps, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 01:50, 14 March 2008 (UTC)
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I am planning to submit this for GA, possibly FA.
Thanks, Starczamora ( talk) 09:18, 28 February 2008 (UTC)
Ruhrfisch comments: this is pretty close to GA or eventual FA as it is. Here are some more suggestions:
- The lead should follow WP:LEAD and summarize the article, as well as not add any facts not in the body of the article.
- Needs a copyedit, especially for punctuation.
- I know he used commas in his poetry, but He was, awarded, the National Artist of the Philippines title... should read He was awarded the National Artist of the Philippines title....
- Spelling is odd - some in quotes, so please double check those (copyedit and proof read). Examples He is known to have introduced the "reversed consonance rime scheme" in writing poetry,... should be " rhyme" ( rime is a kind of ice). Or "The commas are an integral and essential part of the medium: regulating the poem's verbal density and time movement: enabling each word to attain a fuller tonal value, and the line movement to become more measures."[4] - the last word does not fit, perhaps it is supposed to be measured instead?
- Early life, Personal and Death sections are all very short - could they be combined into a single section? Also tense is odd - in Death it says He also has three grandchildren. but he is dead, so he can't be present tense ("had", not "has")
- Images are decent, references seem OK. Good article which needs a little polish,
Hope this helps, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 01:50, 14 March 2008 (UTC)