This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to bring it to
FA status. Please put extra emphasis on prose and word choice!
"Hurricane Cindy was a hurricane..." Unnecessary statement of the obvious.
The verb "to impact" has a different meaning from "to impact on". The former means to force objects closely together, the latter means "affected". It is the latter meaning that's relevant here.
"Re-curved" is a term I've only seen in hurricane articles. What is its plain meaning?
"One driver was killed in Georgetown, South Carolina, when they collided with a fallen tree"; The connection between "one driver" and "they" is awkward (it recurs in the main text). It can be avoided thus: "One driver was killed in Georgetown, South Carolina, after colliding with a fallen tree".
I'm not sure that the statement "Overall damage from Cindy was minimal" is appropriate when it precedes a paragraph describing six deaths, thousands evacuated and significant storm damage. Maybe "Structural damage from Cindy was minimal."?
"USD" not required. In an article about America, $ can be assumed to be USD
An anticyclone—or a large mass of air moving clockwise..." Is the "or" necessary? It's not an either...or situation.
"It is believed that the depression intensified..." Believed by whom?
"The Congaree River rose dramatically near Columbia during the hurricane, where rainfall totaled 5.82 inches (148 mm),[20] although some reliable unofficial sources state the figure to be 15 inches (380 mm)" If the unofficial sources were "reliable", isn't it of some concern that they were so widely different from the official figures?
Use a consistent method of recording times. In the article we have "00:00 UTC", "11:50" and "1:40 pm"
"five indirect deaths" - suggest rephrase. The deaths themselves were not "indirect".
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to bring it to
FA status. Please put extra emphasis on prose and word choice!
"Hurricane Cindy was a hurricane..." Unnecessary statement of the obvious.
The verb "to impact" has a different meaning from "to impact on". The former means to force objects closely together, the latter means "affected". It is the latter meaning that's relevant here.
"Re-curved" is a term I've only seen in hurricane articles. What is its plain meaning?
"One driver was killed in Georgetown, South Carolina, when they collided with a fallen tree"; The connection between "one driver" and "they" is awkward (it recurs in the main text). It can be avoided thus: "One driver was killed in Georgetown, South Carolina, after colliding with a fallen tree".
I'm not sure that the statement "Overall damage from Cindy was minimal" is appropriate when it precedes a paragraph describing six deaths, thousands evacuated and significant storm damage. Maybe "Structural damage from Cindy was minimal."?
"USD" not required. In an article about America, $ can be assumed to be USD
An anticyclone—or a large mass of air moving clockwise..." Is the "or" necessary? It's not an either...or situation.
"It is believed that the depression intensified..." Believed by whom?
"The Congaree River rose dramatically near Columbia during the hurricane, where rainfall totaled 5.82 inches (148 mm),[20] although some reliable unofficial sources state the figure to be 15 inches (380 mm)" If the unofficial sources were "reliable", isn't it of some concern that they were so widely different from the official figures?
Use a consistent method of recording times. In the article we have "00:00 UTC", "11:50" and "1:40 pm"
"five indirect deaths" - suggest rephrase. The deaths themselves were not "indirect".