This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I want to see how this article can be improved to GA-class or later, FA-class.
Thanks, Extremepro ( talk) 10:13, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
Brianboulton comments: I feel that this article has been brought to peer review prematurely, as much more work needs to be done before it can be considered for GA-class. At present the prose content is so slight as to be not much more than a stub. I think in all honesty that the B rating is overgenerous.
Take a look at Kashimashi Girl Meets Girl. This is a manga article that has achieved GA, and could be used by you as a general model for the development of your own article. Note that it has a proper lead summarising the whole article, a detailed plot section, and other developed sections dealing with production, media and reception. Yours needs to approach this level of detail.
Within the little prose that is available, I have problems with sentences such as " Digital Manga Publishing released the manga's four tankōbon of the manga between January 17, 2007 and May 20, 2009." You also have three consecutive sentences of the Reception section beginning: "Comics Worth Reading's Johanna Draper Coulson..." Maybe you should get a little help with the prose as you develop the article. I also think that the ISBN table is an awkward and unnecessary intrusion.
I would like to see this worked up to a good standard, so I hope you won't be discouraged by what I've said, and will continue to work on it.
Brianboulton ( talk) 17:39, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I want to see how this article can be improved to GA-class or later, FA-class.
Thanks, Extremepro ( talk) 10:13, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
Brianboulton comments: I feel that this article has been brought to peer review prematurely, as much more work needs to be done before it can be considered for GA-class. At present the prose content is so slight as to be not much more than a stub. I think in all honesty that the B rating is overgenerous.
Take a look at Kashimashi Girl Meets Girl. This is a manga article that has achieved GA, and could be used by you as a general model for the development of your own article. Note that it has a proper lead summarising the whole article, a detailed plot section, and other developed sections dealing with production, media and reception. Yours needs to approach this level of detail.
Within the little prose that is available, I have problems with sentences such as " Digital Manga Publishing released the manga's four tankōbon of the manga between January 17, 2007 and May 20, 2009." You also have three consecutive sentences of the Reception section beginning: "Comics Worth Reading's Johanna Draper Coulson..." Maybe you should get a little help with the prose as you develop the article. I also think that the ISBN table is an awkward and unnecessary intrusion.
I would like to see this worked up to a good standard, so I hope you won't be discouraged by what I've said, and will continue to work on it.
Brianboulton ( talk) 17:39, 26 April 2009 (UTC)