The article was promoted by Ian Rose 10:03, 9 September 2013 (UTC) [1]. reply
Hurricane Diane ( | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)
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I am nominating this for featured article because I spent a lot of time writing and researching this destructive hurricane earlier this year. I always intended to nominate it, but I never got around to it until now. I hope you all find the storm as fascinating as I did. It's my first FAC in a while, but as I've said since my first FAC here goes nothing! ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk) 18:40, 3 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Oppose, 1a. The writing needs work. I started fixing stuff in the lead, but after finding more (still in the lead), I stopped reading. Random examples:
I think this would benefit from a fresh set of eyes. -- Laser brain (talk) 14:35, 9 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Support - This article is very well written, and it deserves to be an FA class. One comment from the New England impact section: "In Rhode Island, damage was estimated at $21 million, mostly in Woonsocket, and there were three death." - change "death" to "deaths". Otherwise, I see no obvious mistakes. Hurricane Andrew ( 444) 19:48, 15 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Support - The article looks good, but I think the sections might be a bit big. Otherwise, it's good.— CycloneIsaac– E-Mail 21:04, 27 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Image check - all OK (PD NOAA, PD USGS - tweaked tag, own work). Sources and authors provided. GermanJoe ( talk) 07:18, 28 August 2013 (UTC) reply
This is an excellent article that I enjoyed reading. My only quibble on the overall is the often use of passive voice. Perhaps a few of those sentences can be reworded.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
The first sentence reads awkward. I suggest: "Hurricane Diane was a costly 1955 Atlantic Hurricane that struck the eastern coast of the United States. One of three hurricanes to hit North Carolina, during the season, it formed..."-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
The "costliest at its time" bit can be moved before the last sentence in the last paragraph of the lead.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Misplaced comma at the end of the first sentence.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Second paragraph - the "rivers" after "Farmington" is not necessary since the listed names have already been identified as rivers.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Something is missing from the sentence: "The floods severely infrastructure and affected several summer camps."
Should 'severely' be 'severed'?-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Overuse of the word 'occurred' throughout, but especially in the first paragraph. Other words can be used here.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Paragraph three, last sentence - 'overall' is used twice. Only the first is needed.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Paragraph four, second sentence - emdash needed rather than hyphen.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Something is missing from the sentence: "In that city, about 200 people to evacuate their houses along the water."-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
This is all I have at the moment. I may make additional comments later.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Source review - spotchecks not done
Delegate comment -- First sentence, "Hurricane Diane was the costliest Atlantic hurricane at the time." -- can you explain exactly what "at the time" means (the 1955 season, up until 1955, or what?) because it doesn't read well to me and if I know just what you mean I daresay we could come up with something better. Cheers, Ian Rose ( talk) 08:10, 7 September 2013 (UTC) reply
The article was promoted by Ian Rose 10:03, 9 September 2013 (UTC) [1]. reply
Hurricane Diane ( | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)
Toolbox |
---|
I am nominating this for featured article because I spent a lot of time writing and researching this destructive hurricane earlier this year. I always intended to nominate it, but I never got around to it until now. I hope you all find the storm as fascinating as I did. It's my first FAC in a while, but as I've said since my first FAC here goes nothing! ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk) 18:40, 3 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Oppose, 1a. The writing needs work. I started fixing stuff in the lead, but after finding more (still in the lead), I stopped reading. Random examples:
I think this would benefit from a fresh set of eyes. -- Laser brain (talk) 14:35, 9 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Support - This article is very well written, and it deserves to be an FA class. One comment from the New England impact section: "In Rhode Island, damage was estimated at $21 million, mostly in Woonsocket, and there were three death." - change "death" to "deaths". Otherwise, I see no obvious mistakes. Hurricane Andrew ( 444) 19:48, 15 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Support - The article looks good, but I think the sections might be a bit big. Otherwise, it's good.— CycloneIsaac– E-Mail 21:04, 27 August 2013 (UTC) reply
Image check - all OK (PD NOAA, PD USGS - tweaked tag, own work). Sources and authors provided. GermanJoe ( talk) 07:18, 28 August 2013 (UTC) reply
This is an excellent article that I enjoyed reading. My only quibble on the overall is the often use of passive voice. Perhaps a few of those sentences can be reworded.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
The first sentence reads awkward. I suggest: "Hurricane Diane was a costly 1955 Atlantic Hurricane that struck the eastern coast of the United States. One of three hurricanes to hit North Carolina, during the season, it formed..."-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
The "costliest at its time" bit can be moved before the last sentence in the last paragraph of the lead.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Misplaced comma at the end of the first sentence.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Second paragraph - the "rivers" after "Farmington" is not necessary since the listed names have already been identified as rivers.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Something is missing from the sentence: "The floods severely infrastructure and affected several summer camps."
Should 'severely' be 'severed'?-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Overuse of the word 'occurred' throughout, but especially in the first paragraph. Other words can be used here.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Paragraph three, last sentence - 'overall' is used twice. Only the first is needed.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Paragraph four, second sentence - emdash needed rather than hyphen.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Something is missing from the sentence: "In that city, about 200 people to evacuate their houses along the water."-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
This is all I have at the moment. I may make additional comments later.-- William S. Saturn ( talk) 06:54, 1 September 2013 (UTC) reply
Source review - spotchecks not done
Delegate comment -- First sentence, "Hurricane Diane was the costliest Atlantic hurricane at the time." -- can you explain exactly what "at the time" means (the 1955 season, up until 1955, or what?) because it doesn't read well to me and if I know just what you mean I daresay we could come up with something better. Cheers, Ian Rose ( talk) 08:10, 7 September 2013 (UTC) reply