The article was promoted by Ian Rose via FACBot ( talk) 08:44, 19 September 2018 [1].
Hello everyone! The above article is about an American television sitcom created by Jeff Franklin which aired on United Paramount Network (UPN) from August 26 to October 28, 1997. The series revolves around two brothers (played by Peter Dobson and Mitchell Whitfield, respectively), who own the Head Over Heels video dating agency based in Miami Beach, Florida. The episodes include their employees, played by Eva LaRue, Patrick Bristow, and Cindy Ambuehl.
Initially cast as the main characters' mother, Connie Stevens was removed from Head Over Heels after its pilot episode was retooled. With its inclusion of the bisexual Ian, Head Over Heels was one of 30 programs to feature a gay, lesbian or bisexual character that season. Response to the series was primarily negative, with its humor and characters criticized. It was the lowest-performing series tracked by Nielsen Holdings for the 1997–1998 television season. It could be said that neither critics nor audiences were head over heels about this television program.
This is my eighth FAC on a television show article, following the successful promotion of seven other ones. I think I have a firm grasp on the FA expectations for this type of article, though I will greatly appreciate any comments or suggestions. This is what the article looked life before I worked on it. This is yet another one of my projects on an obscure series from UPN. One of these days I am going to work on a television show that people actually remember lol. Thank you in advance, and have a wonderful day and/or night! Aoba47 ( talk) 03:54, 22 August 2018 (UTC)
Those are the only things that stood out to me. Otherwise, I think this is a great little article that would look great with a bronze star. Nice work JOE BRO 64 12:24, 24 August 2018 (UTC)
Lead prose (1a):
Spot-checks of prose (1a):
Doesn't American neoliberal capitalism turn out some garbage. Yuck. I dislike the topic so much I recuse myself from any judgment. But the prose doesn't thrill me for an FAC. Tony (talk) 03:30, 27 August 2018 (UTC)
Well written and good effort article. Good luck. AmericanAir88( talk) 02:48, 1 September 2018 (UTC)
Sorry it took me so long to get around to this, Aoba47. I'd read the article last week when you first contacted me about it, but ended up completely forgetting. Apologies. I have to say though, if I'd responded last week, I would've ended up writing something very similar to what @ Tony1: said above. Certain aspects of the prose were a bit... lacking. Thankfully, AmericanAir88's review above seems to have addressed all of the most glaring examples I spotted. After re-reading, I'm happy with the prose on the body. The only suggestion I'd make is to tighten up the lead a bit further: "The series revolves around brothers Jack and Warren Baldwin (played by Peter Dobson and Mitchell Whitfield, respectively), who own the Head Over Heels video dating agency based in Miami Beach, Florida. The episodes include their employees, played by Eva LaRue, Patrick Bristow, and Cindy Ambuehl. The series frequently employs sex comedy. Andrew Gottlieb ...".
I'd re-write this to something like: "The series is set in the eponymous video
dating agency based in
Miami Beach, Florida, which is run by brothers Jack and Warren Baldwin (played by
Peter Dobson and
Mitchell Whitfield, respectively). The remainder of the cast consists of their employees, played by
Eva LaRue,
Patrick Bristow, and
Cindy Ambuehl.
" I'd then continue the casting theme by including the sentence about Connie Stevens being removed after the pilot episode here, followed by the sentence about the producers. Then I'd incorporate the 'sex comedy' bit into the final sentence of the 2nd paragraph, about the critical reception: "The series received a negative response from commentators, who criticized its characters and broad
sex comedy humor.
"
Aside from those fairly minor points, I can't see any other prose issues. Would be happy to support once the lead gets a makeover. Homeostasis07 ( talk) 13:48, 4 September 2018 (UTC)
Resolved comments from — Bilorv (c) (talk) 22:11, 7 September 2018 (UTC) |
---|
Minor prose issues:
Other issues:
While I was here, I made this tiny edit unrelated to the FA criteria. Overall, very good job digging up these sources – even getting viewing figures for just one episode must have been difficult – and I love seeing edits like this (from 5kB to 28kB!), but there's a few issues at present. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 22:21, 6 September 2018 (UTC) Okay, so I don't think there's anything that can be done about the episode table's plot descriptions, but a couple of the sources do have a few more details for the article. Maybe a fuller description of the first episode can be added to the last paragraph of "Premise and characters" from this:
Also, the Entertainment Weekly source gives overall viewing figures of 2.7 million, which should be mentioned. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 16:35, 7 September 2018 (UTC) Final point: "Storylines include a policy which bans agency employees from dating their clients" – Move this bit to the next sentence so that all the description of the pilot is together. Just "storylines include" and two examples works fine. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 21:13, 7 September 2018 (UTC) |
After one small edit, I'm happy to support promotion to FA. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 22:11, 7 September 2018 (UTC)
There is not much that other editors but shouldn't the episode summary be expanded a bit. Also, has there been a mention of homemedia releases? Tintor2 ( talk) 00:23, 8 September 2018 (UTC)
Hi Aoba, how are you? I’m on the road right now and may or may not have time to give a full review, but I wanted to mention at least a few things that jumped out at me:
@ Moisejp: Thank you for the comments. I believe that I have addressed both of them. I am doing well, and I hope that you are having a good time on the road. Aoba47 ( talk) 17:05, 10 September 2018 (UTC)
All sources seems to pass WP:Reliable source and everything is well-archived. It passes the source review. Tintor2 ( talk) 22:30, 13 September 2018 (UTC)
The article was promoted by Ian Rose via FACBot ( talk) 08:44, 19 September 2018 [1].
Hello everyone! The above article is about an American television sitcom created by Jeff Franklin which aired on United Paramount Network (UPN) from August 26 to October 28, 1997. The series revolves around two brothers (played by Peter Dobson and Mitchell Whitfield, respectively), who own the Head Over Heels video dating agency based in Miami Beach, Florida. The episodes include their employees, played by Eva LaRue, Patrick Bristow, and Cindy Ambuehl.
Initially cast as the main characters' mother, Connie Stevens was removed from Head Over Heels after its pilot episode was retooled. With its inclusion of the bisexual Ian, Head Over Heels was one of 30 programs to feature a gay, lesbian or bisexual character that season. Response to the series was primarily negative, with its humor and characters criticized. It was the lowest-performing series tracked by Nielsen Holdings for the 1997–1998 television season. It could be said that neither critics nor audiences were head over heels about this television program.
This is my eighth FAC on a television show article, following the successful promotion of seven other ones. I think I have a firm grasp on the FA expectations for this type of article, though I will greatly appreciate any comments or suggestions. This is what the article looked life before I worked on it. This is yet another one of my projects on an obscure series from UPN. One of these days I am going to work on a television show that people actually remember lol. Thank you in advance, and have a wonderful day and/or night! Aoba47 ( talk) 03:54, 22 August 2018 (UTC)
Those are the only things that stood out to me. Otherwise, I think this is a great little article that would look great with a bronze star. Nice work JOE BRO 64 12:24, 24 August 2018 (UTC)
Lead prose (1a):
Spot-checks of prose (1a):
Doesn't American neoliberal capitalism turn out some garbage. Yuck. I dislike the topic so much I recuse myself from any judgment. But the prose doesn't thrill me for an FAC. Tony (talk) 03:30, 27 August 2018 (UTC)
Well written and good effort article. Good luck. AmericanAir88( talk) 02:48, 1 September 2018 (UTC)
Sorry it took me so long to get around to this, Aoba47. I'd read the article last week when you first contacted me about it, but ended up completely forgetting. Apologies. I have to say though, if I'd responded last week, I would've ended up writing something very similar to what @ Tony1: said above. Certain aspects of the prose were a bit... lacking. Thankfully, AmericanAir88's review above seems to have addressed all of the most glaring examples I spotted. After re-reading, I'm happy with the prose on the body. The only suggestion I'd make is to tighten up the lead a bit further: "The series revolves around brothers Jack and Warren Baldwin (played by Peter Dobson and Mitchell Whitfield, respectively), who own the Head Over Heels video dating agency based in Miami Beach, Florida. The episodes include their employees, played by Eva LaRue, Patrick Bristow, and Cindy Ambuehl. The series frequently employs sex comedy. Andrew Gottlieb ...".
I'd re-write this to something like: "The series is set in the eponymous video
dating agency based in
Miami Beach, Florida, which is run by brothers Jack and Warren Baldwin (played by
Peter Dobson and
Mitchell Whitfield, respectively). The remainder of the cast consists of their employees, played by
Eva LaRue,
Patrick Bristow, and
Cindy Ambuehl.
" I'd then continue the casting theme by including the sentence about Connie Stevens being removed after the pilot episode here, followed by the sentence about the producers. Then I'd incorporate the 'sex comedy' bit into the final sentence of the 2nd paragraph, about the critical reception: "The series received a negative response from commentators, who criticized its characters and broad
sex comedy humor.
"
Aside from those fairly minor points, I can't see any other prose issues. Would be happy to support once the lead gets a makeover. Homeostasis07 ( talk) 13:48, 4 September 2018 (UTC)
Resolved comments from — Bilorv (c) (talk) 22:11, 7 September 2018 (UTC) |
---|
Minor prose issues:
Other issues:
While I was here, I made this tiny edit unrelated to the FA criteria. Overall, very good job digging up these sources – even getting viewing figures for just one episode must have been difficult – and I love seeing edits like this (from 5kB to 28kB!), but there's a few issues at present. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 22:21, 6 September 2018 (UTC) Okay, so I don't think there's anything that can be done about the episode table's plot descriptions, but a couple of the sources do have a few more details for the article. Maybe a fuller description of the first episode can be added to the last paragraph of "Premise and characters" from this:
Also, the Entertainment Weekly source gives overall viewing figures of 2.7 million, which should be mentioned. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 16:35, 7 September 2018 (UTC) Final point: "Storylines include a policy which bans agency employees from dating their clients" – Move this bit to the next sentence so that all the description of the pilot is together. Just "storylines include" and two examples works fine. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 21:13, 7 September 2018 (UTC) |
After one small edit, I'm happy to support promotion to FA. — Bilorv (c) (talk) 22:11, 7 September 2018 (UTC)
There is not much that other editors but shouldn't the episode summary be expanded a bit. Also, has there been a mention of homemedia releases? Tintor2 ( talk) 00:23, 8 September 2018 (UTC)
Hi Aoba, how are you? I’m on the road right now and may or may not have time to give a full review, but I wanted to mention at least a few things that jumped out at me:
@ Moisejp: Thank you for the comments. I believe that I have addressed both of them. I am doing well, and I hope that you are having a good time on the road. Aoba47 ( talk) 17:05, 10 September 2018 (UTC)
All sources seems to pass WP:Reliable source and everything is well-archived. It passes the source review. Tintor2 ( talk) 22:30, 13 September 2018 (UTC)