I thank you for visiting my user page.
Hello everyone, this is Juliette! My interests are health and adventures. I love to do exercise, dance, sing even though I am not sure if it sounds good, cook myself healthy meals and when I have free time go onto a hike, visit a park and spend time with my family. A skill that I have is that I am bilingual, fluent on Spanish and English and enjoy reading.
I am interested on the knowledgeable aspect of Wikipedia. It is fascinating how you can find almost any article using the search box. I could see myself writing about medicine topics, since I am a college student willing to become a Medical Assistant. I also like animals and care on how to take care of our planet.
 | This user is a student editor in Everett_Community_College/ENGL101_S18_3712_(Spring). |
Article critique
I am interested in the subject of birth defects, which I learned at my disease and pathology class. I know the diseases and preventions that correspond to birth defect. I would like Wikipedia’s Birth Defect page to improve. I visited the Birth Defect page on Wikipedia and found three aspects of it worth commenting on: missing how to prevent birth defect, lack of citation, and irrelevant sentence.
How to prevent birth defects
This article does not have a heading on how to prevent birth defects. You can prevent congenital disorders by completing genetic tests before pregnancy. Pregnant women can start testing for congenital disorders from 10 weeks of pregnancy. Chorionic villus sampling(CVS) is used to diagnose babies with Down syndrome. It consists of using a needle to gather a sample of cells from the mother’s placenta and after that, the sample is sent for testing.
As soon as the baby is born, the baby will go through newborn screening, which is when a pediatrician will examine the baby during his first days of life and check for hearing defects, heart conditions, metabolism, blood and hormone anomalies. Early recognition can prevent those problems from worsening such as a serious physical, intellectual visual or auditory disorder.
Citations
There are missing citations in the “Other” heading. Resources can be found at the bottom of the page but there is no citation and a hard to find resource for this sentence “Other well defined genetic conditions may affect the production of hormones, receptors, structural proteins, and ion channels.” Besides missing a citation, it is hard to understand without giving examples of the genetic conditions that may affect production of hormones, receptors, structural proteins, and ion channels.
Irrelevant sentence
Under the Lack of Nutrients heading I found an irrelevant sentence, “Studies with mice have found that food deprivation of the male mouse prior to conception leads to the offspring displaying significantly lower blood glucose levels”. [57] I agreed with the information that consuming vitamins and minerals such as folic acid before pregnancy and for the first trimester of pregnancy will reduce the risk for your baby to get a congenital disorder, but it made a drastic change to the male mouse which does not add important information and it is out of topic.
Summary
If this article creates a heading on how to prevent a birth defect, it would drag viewers attention and make it a more complete article. This article needs to add citations where they are missing to make it a more reliable and easy to follow article. Removing this irrelevant sentence will make the article look more professional and it will not reduce its credibility.
I thank you for visiting my user page.
Hello everyone, this is Juliette! My interests are health and adventures. I love to do exercise, dance, sing even though I am not sure if it sounds good, cook myself healthy meals and when I have free time go onto a hike, visit a park and spend time with my family. A skill that I have is that I am bilingual, fluent on Spanish and English and enjoy reading.
I am interested on the knowledgeable aspect of Wikipedia. It is fascinating how you can find almost any article using the search box. I could see myself writing about medicine topics, since I am a college student willing to become a Medical Assistant. I also like animals and care on how to take care of our planet.
|
| This user is a student editor in Everett_Community_College/ENGL101_S18_3712_(Spring). |
Article critique
I am interested in the subject of birth defects, which I learned at my disease and pathology class. I know the diseases and preventions that correspond to birth defect. I would like Wikipedia’s Birth Defect page to improve. I visited the Birth Defect page on Wikipedia and found three aspects of it worth commenting on: missing how to prevent birth defect, lack of citation, and irrelevant sentence.
How to prevent birth defects
This article does not have a heading on how to prevent birth defects. You can prevent congenital disorders by completing genetic tests before pregnancy. Pregnant women can start testing for congenital disorders from 10 weeks of pregnancy. Chorionic villus sampling(CVS) is used to diagnose babies with Down syndrome. It consists of using a needle to gather a sample of cells from the mother’s placenta and after that, the sample is sent for testing.
As soon as the baby is born, the baby will go through newborn screening, which is when a pediatrician will examine the baby during his first days of life and check for hearing defects, heart conditions, metabolism, blood and hormone anomalies. Early recognition can prevent those problems from worsening such as a serious physical, intellectual visual or auditory disorder.
Citations
There are missing citations in the “Other” heading. Resources can be found at the bottom of the page but there is no citation and a hard to find resource for this sentence “Other well defined genetic conditions may affect the production of hormones, receptors, structural proteins, and ion channels.” Besides missing a citation, it is hard to understand without giving examples of the genetic conditions that may affect production of hormones, receptors, structural proteins, and ion channels.
Irrelevant sentence
Under the Lack of Nutrients heading I found an irrelevant sentence, “Studies with mice have found that food deprivation of the male mouse prior to conception leads to the offspring displaying significantly lower blood glucose levels”. [57] I agreed with the information that consuming vitamins and minerals such as folic acid before pregnancy and for the first trimester of pregnancy will reduce the risk for your baby to get a congenital disorder, but it made a drastic change to the male mouse which does not add important information and it is out of topic.
Summary
If this article creates a heading on how to prevent a birth defect, it would drag viewers attention and make it a more complete article. This article needs to add citations where they are missing to make it a more reliable and easy to follow article. Removing this irrelevant sentence will make the article look more professional and it will not reduce its credibility.