The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (
|
visual edit |
history) ·
Article talk (
|
history) ·
Watch
Reviewer: Thebiguglyalien ( talk · contribs) 23:26, 17 August 2023 (UTC)
I'll have a review for this posted shortly.
Thebiguglyalien (
talk) 23:26, 17 August 2023 (UTC)
PCN02WPS, the review is posted below. Thebiguglyalien ( talk) 00:24, 18 August 2023 (UTC)
Early in his adulthood, in the early to mid-1820s– Is there a way to word this that doesn't use "early" twice in a row?
antislaverythe proper term? I usually just see "abolitionism".
In 1849, he was among the attendees– It's fairly obvious that we're talking about Breckinridge again, but the last sentence was about James G. Birney, so "he" should be replaced with "Breckinridge".
The following year, Breckinridge returned to academia– We've moved to a new section, so it should specify the year.
and Oakland never fully recovered– This makes it sound like someone that suffered a physical injury. Could this be reworded or clarified?
it closed for good– "for good" feels informal and is somewhat redundant since it was closed and sold.
Centreis used to refer to Centre College, which seems informal.
in the midst of– How about "during"
though that number had dropped– "though" isn't necessary here, since it's adding on to the previous point to confirm the change rather than contradicting it. "and" is fine.
and the graduating classes while he was in office...– "ranged from seven to thirteen students" is more readable than a list.
He formally left office– Clarify
I notice that there are a lot of older sources, including some primary sources. Newer sources would be better, but of course sometimes that's just not possible with lesser known subjects
Reliability:
Spot checks:
This seems to be a subject with limited sources, but it covers the events of his life.
No ideas are given undue weight, and the article does not praise or criticize the subject.
No recent disputes.
Both images are public domain, and both have suitable captions.
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (
|
visual edit |
history) ·
Article talk (
|
history) ·
Watch
Reviewer: Thebiguglyalien ( talk · contribs) 23:26, 17 August 2023 (UTC)
I'll have a review for this posted shortly.
Thebiguglyalien (
talk) 23:26, 17 August 2023 (UTC)
PCN02WPS, the review is posted below. Thebiguglyalien ( talk) 00:24, 18 August 2023 (UTC)
Early in his adulthood, in the early to mid-1820s– Is there a way to word this that doesn't use "early" twice in a row?
antislaverythe proper term? I usually just see "abolitionism".
In 1849, he was among the attendees– It's fairly obvious that we're talking about Breckinridge again, but the last sentence was about James G. Birney, so "he" should be replaced with "Breckinridge".
The following year, Breckinridge returned to academia– We've moved to a new section, so it should specify the year.
and Oakland never fully recovered– This makes it sound like someone that suffered a physical injury. Could this be reworded or clarified?
it closed for good– "for good" feels informal and is somewhat redundant since it was closed and sold.
Centreis used to refer to Centre College, which seems informal.
in the midst of– How about "during"
though that number had dropped– "though" isn't necessary here, since it's adding on to the previous point to confirm the change rather than contradicting it. "and" is fine.
and the graduating classes while he was in office...– "ranged from seven to thirteen students" is more readable than a list.
He formally left office– Clarify
I notice that there are a lot of older sources, including some primary sources. Newer sources would be better, but of course sometimes that's just not possible with lesser known subjects
Reliability:
Spot checks:
This seems to be a subject with limited sources, but it covers the events of his life.
No ideas are given undue weight, and the article does not praise or criticize the subject.
No recent disputes.
Both images are public domain, and both have suitable captions.