The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Electricmaster ( talk · contribs) 09:16, 3 January 2023 (UTC)
Currency conversion needed... and technical copyedit. Once done, renominate.
Edit: While I'm giving this my tentative thumbs up, please check my comment about the intro. While the changes are made, please get a second opinion for approval.
To hell with it. @ Trains13, @ Trainsandotherthings, here's my review. I'm being bold and overtaking this. @ Electricmaster, please use this as a reference when conducting further GA reviews. GA reviews follow a set criteria and notes do need to be made that indicate you've assessed everything. 🏵️ Etrius ( Us) 02:02, 10 January 2023 (UTC)
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It was retired from revenue..sentence is bordering on run on, split
design with the exception of smallerwording is a tad confusion, please simplify.
arrangementsword is vague, modifications?
which allows themwhy change to present tense?
In 1925, Southern Railway president...run-on
As opposed to the 1923–1926 batches..sentence fragment, just rewording the section I highlighted should suffice
Atlanta to Washington, D.C., via Greenville, South Carolina, to Salisburyconfusingly worded
and traveled nearly 2,000,000 miles (3,200,000 km)specify this is a lifetime metric, I would be horrified to learn there are 2 million miles between Salisbury and Monroe
In October 1980, the Museum of History and Technology was renamed to the National Museum of American History to reflect its scope of American history.relevence. Just add 'now called the National Museum of American History, to the preceding sentence.
That should be easy enough to clean up. I'll apologize for that chaotic review up until this point, the page isn't far off from being ready. I'd prefer to not see it sit like most second opinions do. Please note, if this review takes longer than Wednesday, I'll disappear for a few days due to personal obligations offline. 🏵️ Etrius ( Us) 02:02, 10 January 2023 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
GA toolbox |
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Reviewing |
Article (
|
visual edit |
history) ·
Article talk (
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history) ·
Watch
Reviewer: Electricmaster ( talk · contribs) 09:16, 3 January 2023 (UTC)
Currency conversion needed... and technical copyedit. Once done, renominate.
Edit: While I'm giving this my tentative thumbs up, please check my comment about the intro. While the changes are made, please get a second opinion for approval.
To hell with it. @ Trains13, @ Trainsandotherthings, here's my review. I'm being bold and overtaking this. @ Electricmaster, please use this as a reference when conducting further GA reviews. GA reviews follow a set criteria and notes do need to be made that indicate you've assessed everything. 🏵️ Etrius ( Us) 02:02, 10 January 2023 (UTC)
Copy-vios
Sourcing
Images
Prose
It was retired from revenue..sentence is bordering on run on, split
design with the exception of smallerwording is a tad confusion, please simplify.
arrangementsword is vague, modifications?
which allows themwhy change to present tense?
In 1925, Southern Railway president...run-on
As opposed to the 1923–1926 batches..sentence fragment, just rewording the section I highlighted should suffice
Atlanta to Washington, D.C., via Greenville, South Carolina, to Salisburyconfusingly worded
and traveled nearly 2,000,000 miles (3,200,000 km)specify this is a lifetime metric, I would be horrified to learn there are 2 million miles between Salisbury and Monroe
In October 1980, the Museum of History and Technology was renamed to the National Museum of American History to reflect its scope of American history.relevence. Just add 'now called the National Museum of American History, to the preceding sentence.
That should be easy enough to clean up. I'll apologize for that chaotic review up until this point, the page isn't far off from being ready. I'd prefer to not see it sit like most second opinions do. Please note, if this review takes longer than Wednesday, I'll disappear for a few days due to personal obligations offline. 🏵️ Etrius ( Us) 02:02, 10 January 2023 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
|