Watch for Brit vs. American English. Storey is one that I caught. This is awkward: codename modification of
B-29s to carry the bombs. Think there's a typo here: And every day you say on your voyage. Missing a word here: Commander, Cruiser Division 6, despite having commanded a ship.
What real significance is there to the medal citations?
B. Focused:
Link time fuze and anti-aircraft. Howitzers are used against ground targets, not aerial ones. This reads awkwardly as a result: However in late 1943, the Army obtained permission for it to be used over land, and a version was developed that could be used with howitzers. It proved particularly effective against the V-1 flying bomb over England, and later Antwerp. Is the bit about his secretary really important?
A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have
fair use rationales:
B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with
suitable captions:
Overall:
Pass or Fail:
Corrected typos
Added publisher. It isn't in the book, but I tracked it down.
Links added. Re-ordered the stuff about the various types of VT fuzes. Hope it reads better now. The bit about the secretary is interesting. I wanted to tell the reader about the US Navy's role in the Manhattan Project, but without exaggerating its importance. I think the bit about his secretary puts things in a proper perspective.
Hawkeye7 (
talk)
03:18, 12 September 2011 (UTC)reply
Watch for Brit vs. American English. Storey is one that I caught. This is awkward: codename modification of
B-29s to carry the bombs. Think there's a typo here: And every day you say on your voyage. Missing a word here: Commander, Cruiser Division 6, despite having commanded a ship.
What real significance is there to the medal citations?
B. Focused:
Link time fuze and anti-aircraft. Howitzers are used against ground targets, not aerial ones. This reads awkwardly as a result: However in late 1943, the Army obtained permission for it to be used over land, and a version was developed that could be used with howitzers. It proved particularly effective against the V-1 flying bomb over England, and later Antwerp. Is the bit about his secretary really important?
A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have
fair use rationales:
B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with
suitable captions:
Overall:
Pass or Fail:
Corrected typos
Added publisher. It isn't in the book, but I tracked it down.
Links added. Re-ordered the stuff about the various types of VT fuzes. Hope it reads better now. The bit about the secretary is interesting. I wanted to tell the reader about the US Navy's role in the Manhattan Project, but without exaggerating its importance. I think the bit about his secretary puts things in a proper perspective.
Hawkeye7 (
talk)
03:18, 12 September 2011 (UTC)reply