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Reviewer: Brandt Luke Zorn ( talk · contribs) 21:59, 8 April 2019 (UTC)
Howdy, I'm gonna give this article a review. I'll be making copyedits directly to the article, some of which I may explain here in greater depth if I think it's warranted. If you disagree with any of the changes I make, feel free to bring it up here; I'll explain my reasoning if necessary and we can hash it out, or I may see that the original was right in the first place.
"Although the music press generally speculated the band's sophomore record would showcase grunge-inspired garage rock, the band's intention was to make a proper rock record."— There's also a sentence in the lead about this, but this one is from the "Background" section. I looked up a reprint of the cited source and found this. I don't really see anything about music press expectations of a grungey sound (the word "grunge" doesn't appear) or the Foo desire to make a "proper" rock record. I suppose it's possible I found an incomplete reprint, or that you mixed up which source the info came from, but either way I think more clarity is needed here. I get what the sentences mean about a distinction between "more grunge" or "proper rock", but I think a general/unfamiliar reader could fail to understand the distinction—for one thing, it could be a little confusing in light of the fact that the album is nevertheless considered to be "post-grunge".
"Critics found the album a significant American rock release of the era"— I reworded "found" to "deemed"; there are other words that could work, but "found" isn't quite right. A critic can "find" innate/textual aspects of an album—they can find that the lyrics are more introspective than earlier efforts, for instance—but they cannot "find" contextual/metatextual aspects, like its broader significance within the rock music of its time. That significance wasn't an innate quality to be discovered, it was a judgment rendered.
"The album's track listing was designed to resemble a therapy session, splitting the album between uptempo tracks and ballads, reflecting conflicting emotions."— no follow-up on the "therapy" part in the article body, as far as I can tell. The article body contradicts the statement that it's "split" between uptempo tracks and ballads, because the text later says there are three types of tracks: uptempo tracks, ballads, and mixes of both songforms.
"The singles "Monkey Wrench", "Everlong" and "My Hero" peaked within the top ten of US rock radio charts, and the album charted at number three in the United Kingdom."— It seems arbitrary to mix aspects of the US and UK commercial performance into one sentence while omitting other aspects, considering the album also reached the top ten of the Billboard 200—a noteworthy feat. I've expanded this to:
"The singles " Monkey Wrench", " Everlong", and " My Hero" peaked within the top ten of US rock radio charts, and the album charted at number ten on the Billboard 200. The album was also an international commercial success, peaking at number three in the United Kingdom."Feel free to reword the second sentence.
"eventually leading bassist Nate Mendel to enhance his musical formation."I don't understand what that means. — BLZ · talk 23:06, 8 April 2019 (UTC)
Hi there! Sorry for the long absence. As chance would have it, I ended up being busy IRL over virtually the same period that you were. I am back now and will be continuing the review soon. — BLZ · talk 21:08, 2 May 2019 (UTC)
"The album's opener, 'Doll', involves the fear of entering into situations unprepared."
"Grohl stated that 'Doll' was 'basically a song about being afraid to enter into something you're not prepared for.'"
"just before the 1997 MTV Video Music Awards"– what is the significance of this? I'm assuming they performed at it, and if that's the case you should say so.
Some of my earlier comments still need addressing as well. — BLZ · talk 21:46, 30 May 2019 (UTC)
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Reviewer: Brandt Luke Zorn ( talk · contribs) 21:59, 8 April 2019 (UTC)
Howdy, I'm gonna give this article a review. I'll be making copyedits directly to the article, some of which I may explain here in greater depth if I think it's warranted. If you disagree with any of the changes I make, feel free to bring it up here; I'll explain my reasoning if necessary and we can hash it out, or I may see that the original was right in the first place.
"Although the music press generally speculated the band's sophomore record would showcase grunge-inspired garage rock, the band's intention was to make a proper rock record."— There's also a sentence in the lead about this, but this one is from the "Background" section. I looked up a reprint of the cited source and found this. I don't really see anything about music press expectations of a grungey sound (the word "grunge" doesn't appear) or the Foo desire to make a "proper" rock record. I suppose it's possible I found an incomplete reprint, or that you mixed up which source the info came from, but either way I think more clarity is needed here. I get what the sentences mean about a distinction between "more grunge" or "proper rock", but I think a general/unfamiliar reader could fail to understand the distinction—for one thing, it could be a little confusing in light of the fact that the album is nevertheless considered to be "post-grunge".
"Critics found the album a significant American rock release of the era"— I reworded "found" to "deemed"; there are other words that could work, but "found" isn't quite right. A critic can "find" innate/textual aspects of an album—they can find that the lyrics are more introspective than earlier efforts, for instance—but they cannot "find" contextual/metatextual aspects, like its broader significance within the rock music of its time. That significance wasn't an innate quality to be discovered, it was a judgment rendered.
"The album's track listing was designed to resemble a therapy session, splitting the album between uptempo tracks and ballads, reflecting conflicting emotions."— no follow-up on the "therapy" part in the article body, as far as I can tell. The article body contradicts the statement that it's "split" between uptempo tracks and ballads, because the text later says there are three types of tracks: uptempo tracks, ballads, and mixes of both songforms.
"The singles "Monkey Wrench", "Everlong" and "My Hero" peaked within the top ten of US rock radio charts, and the album charted at number three in the United Kingdom."— It seems arbitrary to mix aspects of the US and UK commercial performance into one sentence while omitting other aspects, considering the album also reached the top ten of the Billboard 200—a noteworthy feat. I've expanded this to:
"The singles " Monkey Wrench", " Everlong", and " My Hero" peaked within the top ten of US rock radio charts, and the album charted at number ten on the Billboard 200. The album was also an international commercial success, peaking at number three in the United Kingdom."Feel free to reword the second sentence.
"eventually leading bassist Nate Mendel to enhance his musical formation."I don't understand what that means. — BLZ · talk 23:06, 8 April 2019 (UTC)
Hi there! Sorry for the long absence. As chance would have it, I ended up being busy IRL over virtually the same period that you were. I am back now and will be continuing the review soon. — BLZ · talk 21:08, 2 May 2019 (UTC)
"The album's opener, 'Doll', involves the fear of entering into situations unprepared."
"Grohl stated that 'Doll' was 'basically a song about being afraid to enter into something you're not prepared for.'"
"just before the 1997 MTV Video Music Awards"– what is the significance of this? I'm assuming they performed at it, and if that's the case you should say so.
Some of my earlier comments still need addressing as well. — BLZ · talk 21:46, 30 May 2019 (UTC)