Space Launch System core stage has been listed as one of the
Engineering and technology good articles under the
good article criteria. If you can improve it further,
please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can
reassess it. Review: September 28, 2023. ( Reviewed version). |
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talk page for discussing improvements to the
Space Launch System core stage article. This is not a forum for general discussion of the article's subject. |
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Found this page from the good article nomination. I noticed the first paragraph is significantly under cited. This problem does not persist throughout the article Czarking0 ( talk) 05:43, 13 September 2023 (UTC)
GA toolbox |
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Reviewing |
Reviewer: Czarking0 ( talk · contribs) 05:03, 14 September 2023 (UTC)
I have some editorial comments that I think should be addressed before deciding on GA.
" it is the only stage of the rocket to be used on all three of its planned blocks: 1, 1B, and 2." This line should not be in the opening sentences. The reader does not know what those refer to and it is not a main feature of the booster. They are not explained in this section.
"a super-heavy lift launch vehicle intended for human spaceflight to the Moon, or Mars." It is not 100% clear if this refers to Constellation or to SLS, but I will ignore that and just say that this is the only time Mars is mentioned in this article. Since this is a pretty technical article I would prefer if mars was not mentioned or there were better sources on it actually being feasible for such a feat. I see these sources which suggest NASA plans to make it part of a Mars mission but that seems more like BS to drum up public funding than an actual statement of capability. Happy to admit that I am wrong if shown otherwise. https://www.nasaspaceflight.com/2017/04/nasa-goals-missions-sls-eyes-multi-step-mars/ https://www.planetary.org/articles/20161003-horizon-goal-part-4
You even see other sources which are careful to not actually say Mars. "Michoud is manufacturing and assembling the largest rocket stage NASA has ever constructed: the Space Launch System (SLS) core stage—the world’s most powerful rocket that will send the Orion spacecraft, astronauts and supplies on bold exploration missions to the Moon and beyond." https://www.nasa.gov/centers/marshall/michoud/factsheet.html
Done
"the core stage was once the world's tallest rocket stage" what is the source for this? — Preceding unsigned comment added by Czarking0 ( talk • contribs) 05:15, 18 September 2023 (UTC)
"built to carry approximately 987 tonnes" The source does not say 987. Where did you get this number? Smells like OR.
No that makes sense keep it Done
"After propellant tanks are structurally complete, they are moved to Building 131 of MAF to undergo finishing. Each tank is covered with anti-corrosion zinc oxide primer, robotically sprayed in Cell P of that building." Why should I care what building, or for that matter, what cell of the building these are done in?
Done
"(The Artemis 1 core stage received a manual application)" Off-topic
Done
"the end result is a layer of foam insulation up to 1.2 inches thick." Up to is not a good characterization of what the source says. The tolerance is likely symmetrically distributed.
Done
"For the Green Run test sequence, the Artemis 1 engine section received a unique thermal protection treatment that included a layer of reflective foil tape, designed to reduce the thermal impact of an eight-minute long test firing." Off-topic
I understand the context. Not sure how a reader would actually think about that. Up to you
". Notably, in 2013, the decision was made to revert the core stage's structure from the 2195 aluminum-lithium alloy used on the Super Lightweight Tank, the definitive version of the Space Shuttle external tank, and the Ares 1 upper stage, to a harder 2219 alloy." Why?
Done
"Later, welding issues encountered throughout 2016 would then cause more issues. " Sources indicate the friction welding issues were not on the critical path. Do you have another source supporting this claim? "This issue was resolved by reverting to the original pin design; however, it had a schedule impact of some 5 months" Yes but 5 months off the critical path is my understanding from the sources. That does not really count as a program delay IMO.
Done
Great use of images
I found this sentence which is grammatically incorrect and should be reworked to not use notably: "However, it differed notably in that the core stage was be identical in length and derived from the Space Shuttle External Tank, and possessed only three RS-25 engines instead of four."
This sentence is out of the manual of style guidelines: "NASA reported that the choice would reduce payload capacity by 3 t (6,600 lb) but result in a cost savings of some $30 million per flight."
This sentence is out of the MOS because previous is not defined: "Extensive use of the lightweight 2195 alloy on the Super Lightweight Tank had previously been reduced due to difficulties with brittleness and higher cost of maintenance."
Same here: "Previously, the stage had been shown as painted white and black in a scheme reminiscent of the Saturn V."
I have extensively gone through sources and think the author did a great job.
This article covers exactly what it should. It sometimes gives more background detail than I would suggest; however, I do not think that should hold up a GA
After removing Mars references I think it is good. I would maybe mention if this is planned for use on DST?
It is stable
I would like the author to fix my complaints in the well written category then I will promote to GA Czarking0 ( talk) 16:28, 26 September 2023 (UTC)
Space Launch System core stage has been listed as one of the
Engineering and technology good articles under the
good article criteria. If you can improve it further,
please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can
reassess it. Review: September 28, 2023. ( Reviewed version). |
This is the
talk page for discussing improvements to the
Space Launch System core stage article. This is not a forum for general discussion of the article's subject. |
Article policies
|
Find sources: Google ( books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL |
This article is rated GA-class on Wikipedia's
content assessment scale. It is of interest to the following WikiProjects: | |||||||||||||||||||||
|
Found this page from the good article nomination. I noticed the first paragraph is significantly under cited. This problem does not persist throughout the article Czarking0 ( talk) 05:43, 13 September 2023 (UTC)
GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Reviewer: Czarking0 ( talk · contribs) 05:03, 14 September 2023 (UTC)
I have some editorial comments that I think should be addressed before deciding on GA.
" it is the only stage of the rocket to be used on all three of its planned blocks: 1, 1B, and 2." This line should not be in the opening sentences. The reader does not know what those refer to and it is not a main feature of the booster. They are not explained in this section.
"a super-heavy lift launch vehicle intended for human spaceflight to the Moon, or Mars." It is not 100% clear if this refers to Constellation or to SLS, but I will ignore that and just say that this is the only time Mars is mentioned in this article. Since this is a pretty technical article I would prefer if mars was not mentioned or there were better sources on it actually being feasible for such a feat. I see these sources which suggest NASA plans to make it part of a Mars mission but that seems more like BS to drum up public funding than an actual statement of capability. Happy to admit that I am wrong if shown otherwise. https://www.nasaspaceflight.com/2017/04/nasa-goals-missions-sls-eyes-multi-step-mars/ https://www.planetary.org/articles/20161003-horizon-goal-part-4
You even see other sources which are careful to not actually say Mars. "Michoud is manufacturing and assembling the largest rocket stage NASA has ever constructed: the Space Launch System (SLS) core stage—the world’s most powerful rocket that will send the Orion spacecraft, astronauts and supplies on bold exploration missions to the Moon and beyond." https://www.nasa.gov/centers/marshall/michoud/factsheet.html
Done
"the core stage was once the world's tallest rocket stage" what is the source for this? — Preceding unsigned comment added by Czarking0 ( talk • contribs) 05:15, 18 September 2023 (UTC)
"built to carry approximately 987 tonnes" The source does not say 987. Where did you get this number? Smells like OR.
No that makes sense keep it Done
"After propellant tanks are structurally complete, they are moved to Building 131 of MAF to undergo finishing. Each tank is covered with anti-corrosion zinc oxide primer, robotically sprayed in Cell P of that building." Why should I care what building, or for that matter, what cell of the building these are done in?
Done
"(The Artemis 1 core stage received a manual application)" Off-topic
Done
"the end result is a layer of foam insulation up to 1.2 inches thick." Up to is not a good characterization of what the source says. The tolerance is likely symmetrically distributed.
Done
"For the Green Run test sequence, the Artemis 1 engine section received a unique thermal protection treatment that included a layer of reflective foil tape, designed to reduce the thermal impact of an eight-minute long test firing." Off-topic
I understand the context. Not sure how a reader would actually think about that. Up to you
". Notably, in 2013, the decision was made to revert the core stage's structure from the 2195 aluminum-lithium alloy used on the Super Lightweight Tank, the definitive version of the Space Shuttle external tank, and the Ares 1 upper stage, to a harder 2219 alloy." Why?
Done
"Later, welding issues encountered throughout 2016 would then cause more issues. " Sources indicate the friction welding issues were not on the critical path. Do you have another source supporting this claim? "This issue was resolved by reverting to the original pin design; however, it had a schedule impact of some 5 months" Yes but 5 months off the critical path is my understanding from the sources. That does not really count as a program delay IMO.
Done
Great use of images
I found this sentence which is grammatically incorrect and should be reworked to not use notably: "However, it differed notably in that the core stage was be identical in length and derived from the Space Shuttle External Tank, and possessed only three RS-25 engines instead of four."
This sentence is out of the manual of style guidelines: "NASA reported that the choice would reduce payload capacity by 3 t (6,600 lb) but result in a cost savings of some $30 million per flight."
This sentence is out of the MOS because previous is not defined: "Extensive use of the lightweight 2195 alloy on the Super Lightweight Tank had previously been reduced due to difficulties with brittleness and higher cost of maintenance."
Same here: "Previously, the stage had been shown as painted white and black in a scheme reminiscent of the Saturn V."
I have extensively gone through sources and think the author did a great job.
This article covers exactly what it should. It sometimes gives more background detail than I would suggest; however, I do not think that should hold up a GA
After removing Mars references I think it is good. I would maybe mention if this is planned for use on DST?
It is stable
I would like the author to fix my complaints in the well written category then I will promote to GA Czarking0 ( talk) 16:28, 26 September 2023 (UTC)