It says "written and performed" in the first sentence, and "Written and composed" in the second sentence, no need for second mention
Fixed
Is the song actually about a breakup with sin? Because in the "Background and composition" section, it says it is about breaking up with yourself. Also, add the fact that it is a figurative breakup, not a literal one.
Occasionally, replace "MercyMe" with "the band" or "the group" to avoid repetition
Dones
Add something about critical reception in the lead, just a brief "'So Long Self' received positive reviews from critics, who praised the song's hook" is good
Done
Spell out all chart positions ("number one", "number sixteen", etc.)
Done
There is a bit too much chart info in the lead. The song charting at number sixty-one is not needed here
Done, streamlined information and omitted the decade-end rank.
Background and composition
What does Bart Millard mean when he says "It’s Not About Us"? Is this about the band breaking up? Clarify this.
Done.
"It was recorded in Allaire Studios in Shokan, New York;[2] overdubs..." Citation is not needed in the middle of a sentence, especially when the same citation is at the end of the sentence.
Done
"The song is lyrically about a break-up with sinful human nature" Put this in the first paragraph, where you talk about the lyrics
Done
Reception
Make sure that when "So Long Self" is being discussed, it only has one quote around it (Example: "["So Long Self"] has mass appeal musically and lyrically" should be "['So Long Self'] has mass appeal musically and lyrically"
Done
For the "Chart performance" section, have all chart positions spelled out like in the lead
Done
Music video
"When the band realize they cannot possibly..." ---> "When the band realizes it cannot possibly..."
Done
"they exit the vehicle to stop the doppelgängers" Use "the group exits". Also, "to stop the doppelgängers" sounds a bit strange. Consider rewording.
Done, changed to 'imposters'
I don't think the image of the band in the music video can be used as it violates
WP:NFC#UUI
Which part does it violate? It only seems to even be in question with rule 1.
The problem is that since the band members are currently living, the photo could technically be replaced with a free image. And the reader would not lack understanding of the subject if the photo was not there. This can be worked out later though, as I am not an expert on this. It will not affect the GA review.
Basilisk4u (
talk)
19:29, 9 December 2011 (UTC)reply
Charts
The "Weekly charts" section does not cite any sources
Fixed
References
Need publishers for references 1, 7, 8, 9, and 20
Added publishers for 1, 8, 9, and 20 - 7 already had a publisher (Simpleville Music).
For all citations of Billboard, you only need to link the work and publisher for the first mention. Delink the rest
Done
On hold
I have finished the review and put it on hold for seven days. Address these concerns, and you've got yourself a good article! I am impressed with your dedication to all MercyMe articles. Good luck!
Basilisk4u (
talk)
04:37, 7 December 2011 (UTC)reply
It says "written and performed" in the first sentence, and "Written and composed" in the second sentence, no need for second mention
Fixed
Is the song actually about a breakup with sin? Because in the "Background and composition" section, it says it is about breaking up with yourself. Also, add the fact that it is a figurative breakup, not a literal one.
Occasionally, replace "MercyMe" with "the band" or "the group" to avoid repetition
Dones
Add something about critical reception in the lead, just a brief "'So Long Self' received positive reviews from critics, who praised the song's hook" is good
Done
Spell out all chart positions ("number one", "number sixteen", etc.)
Done
There is a bit too much chart info in the lead. The song charting at number sixty-one is not needed here
Done, streamlined information and omitted the decade-end rank.
Background and composition
What does Bart Millard mean when he says "It’s Not About Us"? Is this about the band breaking up? Clarify this.
Done.
"It was recorded in Allaire Studios in Shokan, New York;[2] overdubs..." Citation is not needed in the middle of a sentence, especially when the same citation is at the end of the sentence.
Done
"The song is lyrically about a break-up with sinful human nature" Put this in the first paragraph, where you talk about the lyrics
Done
Reception
Make sure that when "So Long Self" is being discussed, it only has one quote around it (Example: "["So Long Self"] has mass appeal musically and lyrically" should be "['So Long Self'] has mass appeal musically and lyrically"
Done
For the "Chart performance" section, have all chart positions spelled out like in the lead
Done
Music video
"When the band realize they cannot possibly..." ---> "When the band realizes it cannot possibly..."
Done
"they exit the vehicle to stop the doppelgängers" Use "the group exits". Also, "to stop the doppelgängers" sounds a bit strange. Consider rewording.
Done, changed to 'imposters'
I don't think the image of the band in the music video can be used as it violates
WP:NFC#UUI
Which part does it violate? It only seems to even be in question with rule 1.
The problem is that since the band members are currently living, the photo could technically be replaced with a free image. And the reader would not lack understanding of the subject if the photo was not there. This can be worked out later though, as I am not an expert on this. It will not affect the GA review.
Basilisk4u (
talk)
19:29, 9 December 2011 (UTC)reply
Charts
The "Weekly charts" section does not cite any sources
Fixed
References
Need publishers for references 1, 7, 8, 9, and 20
Added publishers for 1, 8, 9, and 20 - 7 already had a publisher (Simpleville Music).
For all citations of Billboard, you only need to link the work and publisher for the first mention. Delink the rest
Done
On hold
I have finished the review and put it on hold for seven days. Address these concerns, and you've got yourself a good article! I am impressed with your dedication to all MercyMe articles. Good luck!
Basilisk4u (
talk)
04:37, 7 December 2011 (UTC)reply