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Reviewer: Clavdia chauchat ( talk · contribs) 12:37, 29 September 2011 (UTC)
First time reviewer, I hope this will be of some assistance even if it isn't perfect!
This article is improving steadily, but in my opinion it needs more work before it becomes a Good Article.
I noticed a few typos including "enegetic" and "combatitive". Obviously that's only a small thing, but it needs to go through a spellchecker. The quality of the prose itself seems pretty good. I checked some old revisions and someone has been through it with a view to cleaning up the prose, taking out "also," "however" etc. which is good. The personal life section still consists of three very short paragraphs all beginning "Brown..." In the early career section it should be "played for Rangers' youth team" (ie youth team belonging to Rangers) or "the Rangers youth team".
Some (minor) issues too: Since there is somebody else at Scott Brown, I would put a disambiguation thingy at the top of this page. Number of goals is written as seven in 08/09 but 3 in 07/08 and 4 in 10/11 - this should be consistent. Stuff only needs to be linked the first time it appears ( Willie McKay, Champions League, France, Kevin Thomson).
This seems all in order, well referenced. No original research.
Here I think is where the article mainly falls down. It's still much shorter than other footballer GAs and, as such, can't really be comprehensive. I'm not too familiar with Brown but having looked through the sources I'd make a few suggestions:
There is a discrepancy between the excessive detail of his performances for Celtic (describing goals against St Mirren and Hearts) and the lack of other info which might reasonably be included.
With most football articles it is hard to be neutral as the players obviously have great attributes etc. to be playing at the level they are at. Here I would say that all the praise is attributed to reliable sources which is good. Reading between the lines of some of the sources though, Brown is very injury prone and has a discipline problem. Perhaps that needs to be summarised/clarified and referenced appropriately in the article.
It's hinted at in the article and sources that Brown was rubbish in his first campaign at Celtic: he was dropped for Barry Robson and Paul Hartley, then had to "reinvent himself" the next season. Much further down the article it mentions his sister's illness/death. Without resorting to WP:OR I don't think it's a stretch to say the two things might be related. Can this be supported with references?
One other thing: "He was often used on the right of midfield, due to the form of other central midfielders such as Beram Kayal, Joe Ledley and Ki Sung-Yueng" makes it sound like he was shunted out on the wing to accommodate these other players. It's not clear whether the other players are all just better than him, or Brown is versatile enough to perform equally well out wide. You have to register to be able to check the Herald source too.
This might just be my own lack of understanding though!
Not subject to edit wars but still growing and subject to substantial additions and improvements since being nominated.
A couple of very nice pics from flickr, properly tagged. As the article expands I'm sure more can be found too.
I think there are one or two minor things which can be ironed out no problem. But parts, especially the early career, personal life and style of play sections, need quite a radical expansion to get to GA standard. Clavdia chauchat ( talk) 14:30, 29 September 2011 (UTC)
Again, thanks and well done. A lot of work's gone in here. Clavdia chauchat ( talk) 18:30, 7 October 2011 (UTC)
Ok the first 4 things have been done and I took a sentence out of the mega-paragraph. I'm not really sure what more I could take out of it, the Diouf/Bartley stuff covers 4 lines and that would be my preference, but I doubt I could squeeze much out of it. Adam4267 ( talk) 18:56, 7 October 2011 (UTC)
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Reviewer: Clavdia chauchat ( talk · contribs) 12:37, 29 September 2011 (UTC)
First time reviewer, I hope this will be of some assistance even if it isn't perfect!
This article is improving steadily, but in my opinion it needs more work before it becomes a Good Article.
I noticed a few typos including "enegetic" and "combatitive". Obviously that's only a small thing, but it needs to go through a spellchecker. The quality of the prose itself seems pretty good. I checked some old revisions and someone has been through it with a view to cleaning up the prose, taking out "also," "however" etc. which is good. The personal life section still consists of three very short paragraphs all beginning "Brown..." In the early career section it should be "played for Rangers' youth team" (ie youth team belonging to Rangers) or "the Rangers youth team".
Some (minor) issues too: Since there is somebody else at Scott Brown, I would put a disambiguation thingy at the top of this page. Number of goals is written as seven in 08/09 but 3 in 07/08 and 4 in 10/11 - this should be consistent. Stuff only needs to be linked the first time it appears ( Willie McKay, Champions League, France, Kevin Thomson).
This seems all in order, well referenced. No original research.
Here I think is where the article mainly falls down. It's still much shorter than other footballer GAs and, as such, can't really be comprehensive. I'm not too familiar with Brown but having looked through the sources I'd make a few suggestions:
There is a discrepancy between the excessive detail of his performances for Celtic (describing goals against St Mirren and Hearts) and the lack of other info which might reasonably be included.
With most football articles it is hard to be neutral as the players obviously have great attributes etc. to be playing at the level they are at. Here I would say that all the praise is attributed to reliable sources which is good. Reading between the lines of some of the sources though, Brown is very injury prone and has a discipline problem. Perhaps that needs to be summarised/clarified and referenced appropriately in the article.
It's hinted at in the article and sources that Brown was rubbish in his first campaign at Celtic: he was dropped for Barry Robson and Paul Hartley, then had to "reinvent himself" the next season. Much further down the article it mentions his sister's illness/death. Without resorting to WP:OR I don't think it's a stretch to say the two things might be related. Can this be supported with references?
One other thing: "He was often used on the right of midfield, due to the form of other central midfielders such as Beram Kayal, Joe Ledley and Ki Sung-Yueng" makes it sound like he was shunted out on the wing to accommodate these other players. It's not clear whether the other players are all just better than him, or Brown is versatile enough to perform equally well out wide. You have to register to be able to check the Herald source too.
This might just be my own lack of understanding though!
Not subject to edit wars but still growing and subject to substantial additions and improvements since being nominated.
A couple of very nice pics from flickr, properly tagged. As the article expands I'm sure more can be found too.
I think there are one or two minor things which can be ironed out no problem. But parts, especially the early career, personal life and style of play sections, need quite a radical expansion to get to GA standard. Clavdia chauchat ( talk) 14:30, 29 September 2011 (UTC)
Again, thanks and well done. A lot of work's gone in here. Clavdia chauchat ( talk) 18:30, 7 October 2011 (UTC)
Ok the first 4 things have been done and I took a sentence out of the mega-paragraph. I'm not really sure what more I could take out of it, the Diouf/Bartley stuff covers 4 lines and that would be my preference, but I doubt I could squeeze much out of it. Adam4267 ( talk) 18:56, 7 October 2011 (UTC)