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Added some more sections today, but I'm still working on it. Mmagdalene722 ( talk) 19:58, 28 September 2009 (UTC)
I put the "Case definition" subsection back in, though it's much shorter now than it was originally. With surveillance programs, it's important to include the case definition that is used to define and collect cases, because a different case definition could arguably lead to different data. I've shortened and simplified it so that it doesn't have all the jargon or seem like a "how-to" section. Mmagdalene722 ( talk) 12:29, 2 October 2009 (UTC)
I've noticed that there seems to be a disagreement about stating that the SENSOR program specifically did something, e.g. phrases such as 'SENSOR-Pesticides published an article.' This may be contributing to the confusion as to why I've been putting certain sections in the article. SENSOR is run (or perhaps a better word is "administered" or "managed") by a team of epidemiologists and researchers at NIOSH CDC. The program is state-based, meaning the state public health departments are the entities that conduct the surveillance and collect the data. NIOSH scientists collect it, combine it, and correct it (i.e. fill in any missing details). The official program website explains it as follows:
Thus, the program is composed of personnel on both the federal and state level who collaborate to publish the research, but they are all participants in the program (i.e. just because the primary author works for a state health department rather than the federal gov't doesn't mean it's not published by the program). How exactly should we go about wording this? Mmagdalene722 ( talk) 15:33, 6 October 2009 (UTC)
Right now, the sentence "The article generated significant media coverage.[22][23][24]" is a WP:SYNTHESIS/ WP:OR sentence because of the word significant, in my opinion. The word significant was not in any media source I saw cited. I have removed it with this edit. Wervo ( talk) 01:55, 30 September 2009 (UTC)
As one can verify with today's featured article, the ultimate goal here is to have no spaces between inline citations (the numbers given to notes or references) on WP. So please do not revert this formatting, as it is standard. Formatting when it comes to citing sources varies, but links to full text journal articles and doi's are very helpful. Adding doi's to appropriate sources like this doi: 10.1016/j.iheduc.2008.03.001 at the end of journal article references would strengthen the references. Wervo ( talk) 01:11, 1 October 2009 (UTC)
I thought it would be best to bring any concerns about
conflicts of interest out in the open. I am currently working with the SENSOR-Pesticides program through a one-year fellowship provided by non-profit public health organization. I am not a permanent employee of NIOSH, and my fellowship stipend is provided by the outside organization. This article was originally created by the fellow who held my position last year, and my supervisor has requested that I expand and improve the article so as to raise the article's rating on the quality scale.
I believe the potential for bias here is minimal, as SENSOR is a surveillance research program with no regulatory authority and minimal public visibility. However, I understand that there is still potential for a COI issue, which is why I added the article to the US Government project (to make it visible to other users in the project) and why I have solicited the advice and assistance of other users (e.g.
Wervo). Also, if the ultimate goal is to raise the article's quality rating, then it arguably has to be approved by other users as using NPOV. I'd also like to point out that in writing the "Pesticide use in schools" subsection, I specifically drew attention to an news article that quoted criticism of the paper in question.
I apologize for not saying anything until now, but I'm very new to the Wikipedia community, and I only just now read found the
Wikipedia:Conflict of interest guideline. My thanks to the user who brought it my attention.
Mmagdalene722 (
talk) 13:34, 1 October 2009 (UTC)
The current sentence, "Surveillance of pesticide-related injuries and illnesses is recommended by several national agencies,[5] including the American Medical Association,[6] the Council of State and Territorial Epidemiologists (CSTE),[7] the Pew Environmental Health Commission,[8] and the Government Accountability Office.[9][10][11]" implies to me that these organizations lobbied SENSOR-Pesticides into existence. Can we get a more explicit source for this if this is the case? As the section is, I am dissatisfied, because there is no mention of SENSOR itself. It is so general it becomes vague, unspecific, awkward, etc... Not sure what to do to improve this gap... (Maybe the JAMA publication can help?) Wervo ( talk) 16:26, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
Hi, you requested input on my talk page. I think the sentence is ok as it is, but I can see the complaint. It sounds like the OP is saying it's not clear enough how this statement relates to the subject of the article. If that's the case, the rationale should be made specific: "Before SENSOR existed, there was a need for a pesticide-monitoring program; such a program was recommended by the CDC..." If you can't find any sources to back up such a specific claim, I think another way to deal with this is to make the timing of these recommendations specific: "As early as 1989, the CDC recommended..." If the recommendations predate the existence of the program, bada bing. You could even get away with maybe a little "as a result, in 1995 the SENSOR program was developed..." but you'd need a source to verify that the program was indeed developed at least in part in response to these calls. In general I think the article's attempt to justify the existence of its subject or show that there was a need for the program prior to its existence is valid. Did you look at other articles about government programs to get ideas about how they do this (e.g. FDA, CDC)? delldot ∇. 14:33, 16 November 2009 (UTC)
I've opened up the article for peer review and have gotten responses from several (very kind) editors. Several of them actually said that they thought the background section of the article should be expanded to include more information on pesticide poisoning in specific industries (see comments from Colin and Casliber on the peer review page). In response to their comments, I've expanded it with the aforementioned information. MMagdalene722 talk to me 15:08, 5 November 2009 (UTC)
This edit added a lot of content, that at the moment discusses much not directly related to SENSOR (and at this point I am not sure how appropriate mentioning SENSOR is at all in this section). I do not see how this is WP:DUE. Please discuss to what extent reliable sources attribute the Florida Medfly Eradication Program to SENSOR-Pesticides. I am not sure this is appropriate. It appears this content would be better off at the Florida Department of Agriculture. Please discuss. Wervo ( talk) 16:42, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
Per WP:EL: "More than one official link should be provided only when the additional links provide the reader with unique content and are not prominently linked from other official websites." It is not necessary to put links for each individual state's pesticide surveillance page because the official SENSOR page links to all of them. This was previously brought up on my talk page: I had listed the page for each participating state and was requested to trim the External links section. MMagdalene722 talk to me 20:04, 6 November 2009 (UTC)
Reviewer: Jimfbleak - talk to me? 16:26, 1 December 2009 (UTC)
OK, just setting up page, review soon Jimfbleak - talk to me? 16:26, 1 December 2009 (UTC)
The article is clearly of GA quality, and I'll pass it when the issues above are resolved. Let me know if there are any problems Jimfbleak - talk to me? 07:52, 2 December 2009 (UTC)
GA review
(see
here for criteria)
Hooray! Thanks very much! MMagdalene722 talk to me 15:29, 2 December 2009 (UTC)
The user who brought this article to GA status will no longer be in change of it after July 15, 2010. After that date, please notify me on my talk page if the GA status is called into question. Gmcalvert ( talk) 18:41, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
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This is the
talk page for discussing improvements to the
SENSOR-Pesticides article. This is not a forum for general discussion of the article's subject. |
Article policies
|
Find medical sources: Source guidelines · PubMed · Cochrane · DOAJ · Gale · OpenMD · ScienceDirect · Springer · Trip · Wiley · TWL |
![]() | SENSOR-Pesticides has been listed as one of the Natural sciences good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it. | ||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||
Current status: Good article |
![]() | This article is rated GA-class on Wikipedia's
content assessment scale. It is of interest to the following WikiProjects: | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
Added some more sections today, but I'm still working on it. Mmagdalene722 ( talk) 19:58, 28 September 2009 (UTC)
I put the "Case definition" subsection back in, though it's much shorter now than it was originally. With surveillance programs, it's important to include the case definition that is used to define and collect cases, because a different case definition could arguably lead to different data. I've shortened and simplified it so that it doesn't have all the jargon or seem like a "how-to" section. Mmagdalene722 ( talk) 12:29, 2 October 2009 (UTC)
I've noticed that there seems to be a disagreement about stating that the SENSOR program specifically did something, e.g. phrases such as 'SENSOR-Pesticides published an article.' This may be contributing to the confusion as to why I've been putting certain sections in the article. SENSOR is run (or perhaps a better word is "administered" or "managed") by a team of epidemiologists and researchers at NIOSH CDC. The program is state-based, meaning the state public health departments are the entities that conduct the surveillance and collect the data. NIOSH scientists collect it, combine it, and correct it (i.e. fill in any missing details). The official program website explains it as follows:
Thus, the program is composed of personnel on both the federal and state level who collaborate to publish the research, but they are all participants in the program (i.e. just because the primary author works for a state health department rather than the federal gov't doesn't mean it's not published by the program). How exactly should we go about wording this? Mmagdalene722 ( talk) 15:33, 6 October 2009 (UTC)
Right now, the sentence "The article generated significant media coverage.[22][23][24]" is a WP:SYNTHESIS/ WP:OR sentence because of the word significant, in my opinion. The word significant was not in any media source I saw cited. I have removed it with this edit. Wervo ( talk) 01:55, 30 September 2009 (UTC)
As one can verify with today's featured article, the ultimate goal here is to have no spaces between inline citations (the numbers given to notes or references) on WP. So please do not revert this formatting, as it is standard. Formatting when it comes to citing sources varies, but links to full text journal articles and doi's are very helpful. Adding doi's to appropriate sources like this doi: 10.1016/j.iheduc.2008.03.001 at the end of journal article references would strengthen the references. Wervo ( talk) 01:11, 1 October 2009 (UTC)
I thought it would be best to bring any concerns about
conflicts of interest out in the open. I am currently working with the SENSOR-Pesticides program through a one-year fellowship provided by non-profit public health organization. I am not a permanent employee of NIOSH, and my fellowship stipend is provided by the outside organization. This article was originally created by the fellow who held my position last year, and my supervisor has requested that I expand and improve the article so as to raise the article's rating on the quality scale.
I believe the potential for bias here is minimal, as SENSOR is a surveillance research program with no regulatory authority and minimal public visibility. However, I understand that there is still potential for a COI issue, which is why I added the article to the US Government project (to make it visible to other users in the project) and why I have solicited the advice and assistance of other users (e.g.
Wervo). Also, if the ultimate goal is to raise the article's quality rating, then it arguably has to be approved by other users as using NPOV. I'd also like to point out that in writing the "Pesticide use in schools" subsection, I specifically drew attention to an news article that quoted criticism of the paper in question.
I apologize for not saying anything until now, but I'm very new to the Wikipedia community, and I only just now read found the
Wikipedia:Conflict of interest guideline. My thanks to the user who brought it my attention.
Mmagdalene722 (
talk) 13:34, 1 October 2009 (UTC)
The current sentence, "Surveillance of pesticide-related injuries and illnesses is recommended by several national agencies,[5] including the American Medical Association,[6] the Council of State and Territorial Epidemiologists (CSTE),[7] the Pew Environmental Health Commission,[8] and the Government Accountability Office.[9][10][11]" implies to me that these organizations lobbied SENSOR-Pesticides into existence. Can we get a more explicit source for this if this is the case? As the section is, I am dissatisfied, because there is no mention of SENSOR itself. It is so general it becomes vague, unspecific, awkward, etc... Not sure what to do to improve this gap... (Maybe the JAMA publication can help?) Wervo ( talk) 16:26, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
Hi, you requested input on my talk page. I think the sentence is ok as it is, but I can see the complaint. It sounds like the OP is saying it's not clear enough how this statement relates to the subject of the article. If that's the case, the rationale should be made specific: "Before SENSOR existed, there was a need for a pesticide-monitoring program; such a program was recommended by the CDC..." If you can't find any sources to back up such a specific claim, I think another way to deal with this is to make the timing of these recommendations specific: "As early as 1989, the CDC recommended..." If the recommendations predate the existence of the program, bada bing. You could even get away with maybe a little "as a result, in 1995 the SENSOR program was developed..." but you'd need a source to verify that the program was indeed developed at least in part in response to these calls. In general I think the article's attempt to justify the existence of its subject or show that there was a need for the program prior to its existence is valid. Did you look at other articles about government programs to get ideas about how they do this (e.g. FDA, CDC)? delldot ∇. 14:33, 16 November 2009 (UTC)
I've opened up the article for peer review and have gotten responses from several (very kind) editors. Several of them actually said that they thought the background section of the article should be expanded to include more information on pesticide poisoning in specific industries (see comments from Colin and Casliber on the peer review page). In response to their comments, I've expanded it with the aforementioned information. MMagdalene722 talk to me 15:08, 5 November 2009 (UTC)
This edit added a lot of content, that at the moment discusses much not directly related to SENSOR (and at this point I am not sure how appropriate mentioning SENSOR is at all in this section). I do not see how this is WP:DUE. Please discuss to what extent reliable sources attribute the Florida Medfly Eradication Program to SENSOR-Pesticides. I am not sure this is appropriate. It appears this content would be better off at the Florida Department of Agriculture. Please discuss. Wervo ( talk) 16:42, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
Per WP:EL: "More than one official link should be provided only when the additional links provide the reader with unique content and are not prominently linked from other official websites." It is not necessary to put links for each individual state's pesticide surveillance page because the official SENSOR page links to all of them. This was previously brought up on my talk page: I had listed the page for each participating state and was requested to trim the External links section. MMagdalene722 talk to me 20:04, 6 November 2009 (UTC)
Reviewer: Jimfbleak - talk to me? 16:26, 1 December 2009 (UTC)
OK, just setting up page, review soon Jimfbleak - talk to me? 16:26, 1 December 2009 (UTC)
The article is clearly of GA quality, and I'll pass it when the issues above are resolved. Let me know if there are any problems Jimfbleak - talk to me? 07:52, 2 December 2009 (UTC)
GA review
(see
here for criteria)
Hooray! Thanks very much! MMagdalene722 talk to me 15:29, 2 December 2009 (UTC)
The user who brought this article to GA status will no longer be in change of it after July 15, 2010. After that date, please notify me on my talk page if the GA status is called into question. Gmcalvert ( talk) 18:41, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
Hello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just modified 9 external links on SENSOR-Pesticides. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:
When you have finished reviewing my changes, you may follow the instructions on the template below to fix any issues with the URLs.
This message was posted before February 2018.
After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than
regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors
have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the
RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{
source check}}
(last update: 5 June 2024).
Cheers.— InternetArchiveBot ( Report bug) 20:18, 3 July 2017 (UTC)