The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
A. The prose is clear and concise, and the spelling and grammar are correct:
Prose: "The men fled the scene, but three were arrested days later." - should this be "the three were"? - I have gone ahead and made this edit.
Prose: The sentence about the Carlson memorial in 2013 is a little jarring as it comes before the sentence about Burns' death in 2001. Can this sentence be placed a the end so we have a chronological order of events?
There are currently 15 different sources for citations. 13 are from professional media sources, 1 is a primary source reference from a court case (used solely to support the existence of the case) and 1 is a self-published blog produced by a legal firm. The self-published source is supported by the Zamora source - I have edited the article to place Zamora in support of the self-published source.
One image of the individual. However, editors may want to consider inserting images of items or locations mentioned in the article. For example, the article mentions a white Cadillac convertible; there should be a free image available of the type of vehicle somewhere (see
Commons:Category:Cadillac automobiles). Another alternative might be
File:FolsomStatePrison.jpg.
While not enough to stop promotion to GA, I think it would be worth saying something about his ambiguous birthdate. For example, "He was born sometime in 1930 or 1931 but his exact date of birth is unknown."
From Hill To Shore (
talk)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
A. The prose is clear and concise, and the spelling and grammar are correct:
Prose: "The men fled the scene, but three were arrested days later." - should this be "the three were"? - I have gone ahead and made this edit.
Prose: The sentence about the Carlson memorial in 2013 is a little jarring as it comes before the sentence about Burns' death in 2001. Can this sentence be placed a the end so we have a chronological order of events?
There are currently 15 different sources for citations. 13 are from professional media sources, 1 is a primary source reference from a court case (used solely to support the existence of the case) and 1 is a self-published blog produced by a legal firm. The self-published source is supported by the Zamora source - I have edited the article to place Zamora in support of the self-published source.
One image of the individual. However, editors may want to consider inserting images of items or locations mentioned in the article. For example, the article mentions a white Cadillac convertible; there should be a free image available of the type of vehicle somewhere (see
Commons:Category:Cadillac automobiles). Another alternative might be
File:FolsomStatePrison.jpg.
While not enough to stop promotion to GA, I think it would be worth saying something about his ambiguous birthdate. For example, "He was born sometime in 1930 or 1931 but his exact date of birth is unknown."
From Hill To Shore (
talk)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.