| GA toolbox |
|---|
| Reviewing |
Article (
|
visual edit |
history) ·
Article talk (
|
history) ·
Watch
Reviewer: Peacemaker67 ( talk · contribs) 07:11, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
Not a lot to nitpick with this one, so up to your usual high standard. I've read it through twice and could only find the following pretty minor things:
- there is inconsistency in how the Montebello Islands are presented, also Monte Bello Islands. I think the former is the standard spelling.
Standardised on "Montebello". All the sources use "Monte Bello".
- say what Beadell was?
- added " the
surveyor at the
Long Range Weapons Establishment"
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- re: Penny's visit to the selected site, hadn't Beadell already seen the area?
- tweaked the text.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- who was Leslie Martin and why was he included?
- added "the Defence Scientific Adviser"
- I think it should be Land Rover, as it is a proper name
- it is mentioned as the Emu site, but wasn't it the Emu Field site?
- Sources are inconsistent on this point. Changed.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- should Engineer in Chief be hyphenated?
- Not in AusEng, per the Commonwealth Style Guide. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- link 17th Construction Squadron (Australia)
- suggest "with elements from the Royal Australian Electrical and Mechanical Engineers"
- what were the purposes for which the USAF aircraft were to be used?
- added "for radioactive cloud sampling"
- Salibury needs an s, and should it be LRWE Salisbury?
- Corrected.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- suggest linking Artesian aquifer for bore water
- drop the parenthesis from "on a lake bed)."
- say what Titterton was
- suggest "in 1917 had disrupted"
- suggest "Walter MacDougall
washad been appointed" - Clay Pan, is this referring to the Dingo Claypan? Or the Emu Field site in general?
- Changed to "Dingo Claypan"
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- should that be Yankuntjatjarra rather than Jangkuntjara? Jangkundjara is a common misspelling, so this may also be such. There are often many different versions.
- Yes, following the sources. Corrected. Have you heard of the bitter dispute over the spelling of Ngunnawal?
- Did the RC conclude that Aboriginal people were exposed to the tests as a result of the inadequate warnings?
- how long did it take for the polonium to decay to safe levels?
- Po 210 has a half-life of 138 days. It would take a few years. By now it would have decayed to a few thousand atoms per mole. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- there were canvas screens on the aircraft? Or inside the windows? Doesn't sound very aerodynamic to me.
- That's what the source says: "the plane was sealed with long canvas screens, obliterating every window except the pilot's." Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- "cloud ma
kde 15"- Corrected.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- "although they were instructed not to eat or smoke" before decontamination, or while working on the aircraft?
- added "While working on the aircraft"
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- link Granite Downs
- "injuries received by Aboriginal
Ppeople"- De-capped.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- is there post-1985 information about the impacts of the tests on Aboriginal people?
- Don't know of any. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- I'd be consistent between Area K and K site
- Consisted.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- I'm left wondering about the Australian (and British) veterans of the tests. Doesn't the Department of Veterans' Affairs look after veterans of these tests? This seems like an area that should be covered in the article.
- The problem is that the article is about Totem, and it is hard to separate them from the larger group involved in Maralinga. I've described what the servicemen did. (I really hope you're not expecting the DVA to be like Santa's workshop.) Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- why were monitoring stations established across Australia for later tests? Were they concerned that fallout affected wider areas?
- Sort of. The tests revealed hard-to-predict patterns of fallout. In the late 1950s, concerns grew over rising levels of radioactive contamination in the northern hemisphere resulting from atmospheric testing, particularly strontium 90. So the Australian government became more concerned, and more detailed monitoring was put in place. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- fn 35 "Whewn the Desert Skies Caught Fire" has a typo
- Corrected.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- ISBNs could be provided for the two volumes of the RC, just for completeness.
That's me done. Nice work. Peacemaker67 ( click to talk to me) 08:45, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- This article is well-written, verifiable using reliable sources, covers the subject well, is neutral and stable, contains no plagiarism, and is illustrated by appropriately licensed images with appropriate captions. Passing. Nice work! Peacemaker67 ( click to talk to me) 00:07, 24 October 2018 (UTC)
| GA toolbox |
|---|
| Reviewing |
Article (
|
visual edit |
history) ·
Article talk (
|
history) ·
Watch
Reviewer: Peacemaker67 ( talk · contribs) 07:11, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
Not a lot to nitpick with this one, so up to your usual high standard. I've read it through twice and could only find the following pretty minor things:
- there is inconsistency in how the Montebello Islands are presented, also Monte Bello Islands. I think the former is the standard spelling.
- Standardised on "Montebello". All the sources use "Monte Bello".
- say what Beadell was?
- added " the
surveyor at the
Long Range Weapons Establishment"
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- re: Penny's visit to the selected site, hadn't Beadell already seen the area?
- tweaked the text.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- who was Leslie Martin and why was he included?
- added "the Defence Scientific Adviser"
- I think it should be Land Rover, as it is a proper name
- it is mentioned as the Emu site, but wasn't it the Emu Field site?
- Sources are inconsistent on this point. Changed.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- should Engineer in Chief be hyphenated?
- Not in AusEng, per the Commonwealth Style Guide. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- link 17th Construction Squadron (Australia)
- suggest "with elements from the Royal Australian Electrical and Mechanical Engineers"
- what were the purposes for which the USAF aircraft were to be used?
- added "for radioactive cloud sampling"
- Salibury needs an s, and should it be LRWE Salisbury?
- Corrected.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- suggest linking Artesian aquifer for bore water
- drop the parenthesis from "on a lake bed)."
- say what Titterton was
- suggest "in 1917 had disrupted"
- suggest "Walter MacDougall
washad been appointed" - Clay Pan, is this referring to the Dingo Claypan? Or the Emu Field site in general?
- Changed to "Dingo Claypan"
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- should that be Yankuntjatjarra rather than Jangkuntjara? Jangkundjara is a common misspelling, so this may also be such. There are often many different versions.
- Yes, following the sources. Corrected. Have you heard of the bitter dispute over the spelling of Ngunnawal?
- Did the RC conclude that Aboriginal people were exposed to the tests as a result of the inadequate warnings?
- how long did it take for the polonium to decay to safe levels?
- Po 210 has a half-life of 138 days. It would take a few years. By now it would have decayed to a few thousand atoms per mole. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- there were canvas screens on the aircraft? Or inside the windows? Doesn't sound very aerodynamic to me.
- That's what the source says: "the plane was sealed with long canvas screens, obliterating every window except the pilot's." Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- "cloud ma
kde 15"- Corrected.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- "although they were instructed not to eat or smoke" before decontamination, or while working on the aircraft?
- added "While working on the aircraft"
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- link Granite Downs
- "injuries received by Aboriginal
Ppeople"- De-capped.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- is there post-1985 information about the impacts of the tests on Aboriginal people?
- Don't know of any. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- I'd be consistent between Area K and K site
- Consisted.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- I'm left wondering about the Australian (and British) veterans of the tests. Doesn't the Department of Veterans' Affairs look after veterans of these tests? This seems like an area that should be covered in the article.
- The problem is that the article is about Totem, and it is hard to separate them from the larger group involved in Maralinga. I've described what the servicemen did. (I really hope you're not expecting the DVA to be like Santa's workshop.) Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- why were monitoring stations established across Australia for later tests? Were they concerned that fallout affected wider areas?
- Sort of. The tests revealed hard-to-predict patterns of fallout. In the late 1950s, concerns grew over rising levels of radioactive contamination in the northern hemisphere resulting from atmospheric testing, particularly strontium 90. So the Australian government became more concerned, and more detailed monitoring was put in place. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- fn 35 "Whewn the Desert Skies Caught Fire" has a typo
- Corrected.
Hawkeye7
(discuss)
12:37, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- ISBNs could be provided for the two volumes of the RC, just for completeness.
That's me done. Nice work. Peacemaker67 ( click to talk to me) 08:45, 23 October 2018 (UTC)
- This article is well-written, verifiable using reliable sources, covers the subject well, is neutral and stable, contains no plagiarism, and is illustrated by appropriately licensed images with appropriate captions. Passing. Nice work! Peacemaker67 ( click to talk to me) 00:07, 24 October 2018 (UTC)