The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Should be all! I have placed this article on hold for now. Please ping me once you have addressed my concerns so that I can know when to reevaluate. Thanks, 𓃦LunaEatsTuna (
💬)
18:48, 5 February 2023 (UTC)reply
"Two steamships" – I think we can wikilink steamship here.
Done
"loans from the Commonwealth of Massachusetts" – just "Massachusetts" is fine.
Done
"(The railroad was assisted by a federally-funded dredging of the Thames River channel.)" – starting and ending a new sentence with parentheses looks quite odd; are these really necessary?
Done
"10% of the stock value; the struggling NY&NE cancelled the lease in 1884 and re-leased it at 8%." – recommend "10 percent" and "8 percent" per
MOS:%.
Done
"With southern New England's dominant railroad in control," – I would wikilink New England for the benefit of non-American readers.
"arguing that with the disaffirming of the lease it was not really part of Penn Central." – could it say something like "actually" or "technically" as opposed to "really"?
"plus a guarantee of financing from a bank to purchase the line." – ignore me if this is standard American English; could it say "as well as" instead of "plus"?
"In contrast, the Norwich and Worcester had no train crews or trains" – recommend "In contrast, the Norwich and Worcester had no train crews nor trains"
"(By that time, the southern section was served by a weekday freight, while the northern section only had twice weekly service and was no longer used as a through route to Worcester.)" – same concern with the parenthesis as above.
Done
Refs
All sources are RS. Spotcheck—no concerns with refs 1, 11, 12, 15 or 21. But for ref 24 b:
I could not seem to find where it mentions the Norwich and Worcester had no train crews nor trains?
My bad, it's ref 17 (Weicker Bolsters RR For Area) that explicitly states "Weicker said the Norwich and Worcester Railroad Co., which owns the track in question, has not actively run trains in the area for more than 100 years." Added a footnote to this source at the location in question. Ref 15 (Dodd Supports Rail Unit) also discusses this.
Trainsandotherthings (
talk)
02:48, 6 February 2023 (UTC)reply
Thanks, noted.
Formatting:
Some web refs have retrieval dates whilst others do not.
Okay, the article needs to be updated to reflect this. Refs 23–25 are scans with retrieval dates and ref 11 a digital work without a retrieval date, for instance.
Refs 14, 23–25 and Karr 2017 have location parameters whilst none of the other templates do.
I use location parameters for newspapers when the location of publication isn't obvious from the title. The Day is a good example; there's also a newspaper called The Dayin Ukraine. But the Boston Globe or Boston Evening Transcript doesn't need a location parameter since it's obvious it's in Boston.
Trainsandotherthings (
talk)
02:48, 6 February 2023 (UTC)reply
Oh I see. That makes sense.
Other
Infobox, short desc,
WP:ALT text, navs, other templates and cats good.
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Should be all! I have placed this article on hold for now. Please ping me once you have addressed my concerns so that I can know when to reevaluate. Thanks, 𓃦LunaEatsTuna (
💬)
18:48, 5 February 2023 (UTC)reply
"Two steamships" – I think we can wikilink steamship here.
Done
"loans from the Commonwealth of Massachusetts" – just "Massachusetts" is fine.
Done
"(The railroad was assisted by a federally-funded dredging of the Thames River channel.)" – starting and ending a new sentence with parentheses looks quite odd; are these really necessary?
Done
"10% of the stock value; the struggling NY&NE cancelled the lease in 1884 and re-leased it at 8%." – recommend "10 percent" and "8 percent" per
MOS:%.
Done
"With southern New England's dominant railroad in control," – I would wikilink New England for the benefit of non-American readers.
"arguing that with the disaffirming of the lease it was not really part of Penn Central." – could it say something like "actually" or "technically" as opposed to "really"?
"plus a guarantee of financing from a bank to purchase the line." – ignore me if this is standard American English; could it say "as well as" instead of "plus"?
"In contrast, the Norwich and Worcester had no train crews or trains" – recommend "In contrast, the Norwich and Worcester had no train crews nor trains"
"(By that time, the southern section was served by a weekday freight, while the northern section only had twice weekly service and was no longer used as a through route to Worcester.)" – same concern with the parenthesis as above.
Done
Refs
All sources are RS. Spotcheck—no concerns with refs 1, 11, 12, 15 or 21. But for ref 24 b:
I could not seem to find where it mentions the Norwich and Worcester had no train crews nor trains?
My bad, it's ref 17 (Weicker Bolsters RR For Area) that explicitly states "Weicker said the Norwich and Worcester Railroad Co., which owns the track in question, has not actively run trains in the area for more than 100 years." Added a footnote to this source at the location in question. Ref 15 (Dodd Supports Rail Unit) also discusses this.
Trainsandotherthings (
talk)
02:48, 6 February 2023 (UTC)reply
Thanks, noted.
Formatting:
Some web refs have retrieval dates whilst others do not.
Okay, the article needs to be updated to reflect this. Refs 23–25 are scans with retrieval dates and ref 11 a digital work without a retrieval date, for instance.
Refs 14, 23–25 and Karr 2017 have location parameters whilst none of the other templates do.
I use location parameters for newspapers when the location of publication isn't obvious from the title. The Day is a good example; there's also a newspaper called The Dayin Ukraine. But the Boston Globe or Boston Evening Transcript doesn't need a location parameter since it's obvious it's in Boston.
Trainsandotherthings (
talk)
02:48, 6 February 2023 (UTC)reply
Oh I see. That makes sense.
Other
Infobox, short desc,
WP:ALT text, navs, other templates and cats good.
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.