I'd like to apologise for the delay in reviewing in the article. Unfortunately real-life commitments mean I won't be able to review the article until Monday morning (UTC) at the earliest. My sincerest apologies again for the delay. ♥
Nici♥
Vampire♥
Heart♥
02:52, 12 July 2009 (UTC)reply
Lead section: "His playing style and ability have drawn comparisons to football legend Diego Maradona. Indeed, Maradona himself declared Messi his "successor"." - combine these into one sentence. Something like "His playing style and ability have drawn comparisons to football legend Diego Maradona, who himself declared Messi his "successor"."
Early life section: "but did not have enough money to pay for the treatment of the illness that cost $900 a month" is a little wordy and awkward. Try to shorten it down a little, to something like "but did not have enough money to pay for his treatment, as it was $900 a month"
Early life section: This sentence is too long --> "Carles Rexach, the sporting director of FC Barcelona, was made aware of Messi's talent as Messi had relatives in Catalonia so Messi and his father managed to arrange a trial, and FC Barcelona signed him after watching him play, offering to pay for the medical bills if he was willing to move to Spain". Split it into two; I think the best place would be after "arrange a trial".
2005–06 season section: "However, his season ended prematurely on 7 March 2006" --> "His season ended prematurely on 7 March 2006, however" - I was always taught that it is bad grammar to put however at the start of a sentence.
2006–07 season section: "Once again, El Clásico" --> this indicates that you've mentioned Messi's performance in El Clásico, but you haven't. Remove the "once again".
2007–08 season section: "He scored two goals against FC Sevilla on 22 September. A few days earlier he had scored as Barcelona defeated Olympique Lyonnais 3–0 at home in a Champions League match" --> put this in chronological order (i.e. the order in which it happened).
2008–09 season section: What's "Copa del Rey"? Wikilink if possible. Actually, noticing that's wikilinked in the last paragrph of the
2008–08 season section. Change the link to the first instance please.
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "He also played in the farewell match against the Argentine U-20" - what's a farewell match? Do you mean the last match before they went to the World Cup or what?
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "against Germany after which they lost 4-2 on a penalty shootout" - implies that because Messi was on the bench, they lost 4-2. Change this to "against Germany, which they lost 4-2 on a penalty shootout"
Personal life section: "is the face of Pro Evolution Soccer 2010 where he is also involved" --> "is the face of Pro Evolution Soccer 2010, and was also involved"
Make sure each link occurs only once (
WP:OVERLINK), I noticed "Barça" for one, and "Copa del Rey" is wikilinked twice in the one paragrpah. Also "La Liga" and "UEFA Champions League". In the
Copa America 2007 section, you link "Copa America" twice.
2005-06 season section: source for "and was finally able to make his debut in the season's Spanish First Division. He had previously been unable to play because Barcelona had filled their quota of non-EU players."?
2006-07 season section: "Frank Rijkaard carefully managed his complete return, gradually increasing playing minutes with each game. One month after his return, on 10 March, he played his first full league match since the injury against Real Madrid." needs a source.
2007-08 season: "Various football personalities such as Ronaldinho, Samuel Eto'o, Frank Rijkaard, Bernd Schuster, Raúl, Gianluca Zambrotta, Francesco Totti, Alfredo di Stéfano, Diego Maradona and Pelé have all, at one time or another, declared that they consider Messi to be one of the current best footballers in the world" is not covered by the cites provided. I don't speak Spanish, so I ran the sources through google translate, and the only I got praising Messi was Francesco Totti. The rest need to be removed or sourced.
2008–08 season section: "a wonderful performance" - wonderful? Is that a quote or an opinion? If a quote, use quotation marks, if an opinion remove it.
Really? Strange. Well, obviously, if consensus is not to have it, then that's fine, but I personally have always preferred a caption in the infobox. ♥
Nici♥
Vampire♥
Heart♥
16:14, 16 July 2009 (UTC)reply
2006–07 season section: please switch the positions of the images (i.e. put the bottom one in the position the top one is currently in, and vice versa). This is per
MOS:IMAGES - "place images of faces so that the face or eyes look toward the text".
2007-2008 season section:, the image caption says "Messi takes Barça to 2:0 against Sevilla at Camp Nou on 22 September 2007" (emphasis mine). Thourghout the article, you've said 3–0, 4–1, etc, with a dash. Please do the same in the image captions.
Overall, an interesting and well-written article. Apologies once again for the delay, and apologies for having to keep you waiting for the review of the references. It'll be done in the next 24 hours or so. References review now completed.
I don't anticipate any major problems with the sources, so I am placing this article on hold for seven days to allow you to fix the problems listed so far. If the work is completed before then, I will pass the article before the seven days are up. If no attempts are made to correct the problems, I will fail the article in seven days. If you are not finished, I have no problem in extending the hold period to allow you to finish, as long as I see work is being carried out on the article.
To make it easier for me to see how much work has been done, please either strike each comment when the problem has been fixed or post a note underneath each item saying it is completed.
Feel free request to clarification on anything; you can leave comments on my talk page or here, as I have this page watchlisted.
Early life section: "Carles Rexach, the sporting director of FC Barcelona, was made aware of his talent as Messi had relatives in Catalonia so Messi and his father managed to arrange a trial" --> "Carles Rexach, the sporting director of FC Barcelona, had been made aware of his talent, as Messi had relatives in Catalonia, and Messi and his father were able to arrange a trial".
2008–09 season section: "match billed as a friendly battle between Messi and good friend Sergio Agüero." --> "match billed as a friendly battle between Messi and his good friend Sergio Agüero."
2008-09 season section: "scoring one and assisting another two, in a 4–1 victory over Athletic Bilbao." --> "scoring one goal and assisting another two, in a 4–1 victory over Athletic Bilbao."
2008-09 season section: "giving Barcelona a two goal lead, he also became the top scorer in the Champions League with nine goals" --> "giving Barcelona a two goal lead; he also became the top scorer in the Champions League with nine goals"
2009-09 season section: "That meant Barcelona had won the Copa del Rey, La Liga and UEFA Champions League this season. This was the first time a Spanish club had ever won the treble." --> "This victory meant Barcelona had won the Copa del Rey, La Liga and UEFA Champions League in the one season, and was the first time a Spanish club had ever won the treble."
International career section: "for Argentina against Peru, after the match Pekerman" --> "for Argentina against Peru; after the match Pekerman"
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "also scored the final goal in the 6–0 victory, that made him the youngest scorer" --> "also scored the final goal in the 6–0 victory, making him the youngest scorer"
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "He appeared to score a goal, but was ruled offside" --> "He appeared to score a goal, but it was ruled offside"
I'd like to apologise for the delay in reviewing in the article. Unfortunately real-life commitments mean I won't be able to review the article until Monday morning (UTC) at the earliest. My sincerest apologies again for the delay. ♥
Nici♥
Vampire♥
Heart♥
02:52, 12 July 2009 (UTC)reply
Lead section: "His playing style and ability have drawn comparisons to football legend Diego Maradona. Indeed, Maradona himself declared Messi his "successor"." - combine these into one sentence. Something like "His playing style and ability have drawn comparisons to football legend Diego Maradona, who himself declared Messi his "successor"."
Early life section: "but did not have enough money to pay for the treatment of the illness that cost $900 a month" is a little wordy and awkward. Try to shorten it down a little, to something like "but did not have enough money to pay for his treatment, as it was $900 a month"
Early life section: This sentence is too long --> "Carles Rexach, the sporting director of FC Barcelona, was made aware of Messi's talent as Messi had relatives in Catalonia so Messi and his father managed to arrange a trial, and FC Barcelona signed him after watching him play, offering to pay for the medical bills if he was willing to move to Spain". Split it into two; I think the best place would be after "arrange a trial".
2005–06 season section: "However, his season ended prematurely on 7 March 2006" --> "His season ended prematurely on 7 March 2006, however" - I was always taught that it is bad grammar to put however at the start of a sentence.
2006–07 season section: "Once again, El Clásico" --> this indicates that you've mentioned Messi's performance in El Clásico, but you haven't. Remove the "once again".
2007–08 season section: "He scored two goals against FC Sevilla on 22 September. A few days earlier he had scored as Barcelona defeated Olympique Lyonnais 3–0 at home in a Champions League match" --> put this in chronological order (i.e. the order in which it happened).
2008–09 season section: What's "Copa del Rey"? Wikilink if possible. Actually, noticing that's wikilinked in the last paragrph of the
2008–08 season section. Change the link to the first instance please.
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "He also played in the farewell match against the Argentine U-20" - what's a farewell match? Do you mean the last match before they went to the World Cup or what?
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "against Germany after which they lost 4-2 on a penalty shootout" - implies that because Messi was on the bench, they lost 4-2. Change this to "against Germany, which they lost 4-2 on a penalty shootout"
Personal life section: "is the face of Pro Evolution Soccer 2010 where he is also involved" --> "is the face of Pro Evolution Soccer 2010, and was also involved"
Make sure each link occurs only once (
WP:OVERLINK), I noticed "Barça" for one, and "Copa del Rey" is wikilinked twice in the one paragrpah. Also "La Liga" and "UEFA Champions League". In the
Copa America 2007 section, you link "Copa America" twice.
2005-06 season section: source for "and was finally able to make his debut in the season's Spanish First Division. He had previously been unable to play because Barcelona had filled their quota of non-EU players."?
2006-07 season section: "Frank Rijkaard carefully managed his complete return, gradually increasing playing minutes with each game. One month after his return, on 10 March, he played his first full league match since the injury against Real Madrid." needs a source.
2007-08 season: "Various football personalities such as Ronaldinho, Samuel Eto'o, Frank Rijkaard, Bernd Schuster, Raúl, Gianluca Zambrotta, Francesco Totti, Alfredo di Stéfano, Diego Maradona and Pelé have all, at one time or another, declared that they consider Messi to be one of the current best footballers in the world" is not covered by the cites provided. I don't speak Spanish, so I ran the sources through google translate, and the only I got praising Messi was Francesco Totti. The rest need to be removed or sourced.
2008–08 season section: "a wonderful performance" - wonderful? Is that a quote or an opinion? If a quote, use quotation marks, if an opinion remove it.
Really? Strange. Well, obviously, if consensus is not to have it, then that's fine, but I personally have always preferred a caption in the infobox. ♥
Nici♥
Vampire♥
Heart♥
16:14, 16 July 2009 (UTC)reply
2006–07 season section: please switch the positions of the images (i.e. put the bottom one in the position the top one is currently in, and vice versa). This is per
MOS:IMAGES - "place images of faces so that the face or eyes look toward the text".
2007-2008 season section:, the image caption says "Messi takes Barça to 2:0 against Sevilla at Camp Nou on 22 September 2007" (emphasis mine). Thourghout the article, you've said 3–0, 4–1, etc, with a dash. Please do the same in the image captions.
Overall, an interesting and well-written article. Apologies once again for the delay, and apologies for having to keep you waiting for the review of the references. It'll be done in the next 24 hours or so. References review now completed.
I don't anticipate any major problems with the sources, so I am placing this article on hold for seven days to allow you to fix the problems listed so far. If the work is completed before then, I will pass the article before the seven days are up. If no attempts are made to correct the problems, I will fail the article in seven days. If you are not finished, I have no problem in extending the hold period to allow you to finish, as long as I see work is being carried out on the article.
To make it easier for me to see how much work has been done, please either strike each comment when the problem has been fixed or post a note underneath each item saying it is completed.
Feel free request to clarification on anything; you can leave comments on my talk page or here, as I have this page watchlisted.
Early life section: "Carles Rexach, the sporting director of FC Barcelona, was made aware of his talent as Messi had relatives in Catalonia so Messi and his father managed to arrange a trial" --> "Carles Rexach, the sporting director of FC Barcelona, had been made aware of his talent, as Messi had relatives in Catalonia, and Messi and his father were able to arrange a trial".
2008–09 season section: "match billed as a friendly battle between Messi and good friend Sergio Agüero." --> "match billed as a friendly battle between Messi and his good friend Sergio Agüero."
2008-09 season section: "scoring one and assisting another two, in a 4–1 victory over Athletic Bilbao." --> "scoring one goal and assisting another two, in a 4–1 victory over Athletic Bilbao."
2008-09 season section: "giving Barcelona a two goal lead, he also became the top scorer in the Champions League with nine goals" --> "giving Barcelona a two goal lead; he also became the top scorer in the Champions League with nine goals"
2009-09 season section: "That meant Barcelona had won the Copa del Rey, La Liga and UEFA Champions League this season. This was the first time a Spanish club had ever won the treble." --> "This victory meant Barcelona had won the Copa del Rey, La Liga and UEFA Champions League in the one season, and was the first time a Spanish club had ever won the treble."
International career section: "for Argentina against Peru, after the match Pekerman" --> "for Argentina against Peru; after the match Pekerman"
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "also scored the final goal in the 6–0 victory, that made him the youngest scorer" --> "also scored the final goal in the 6–0 victory, making him the youngest scorer"
FIFA World Cup 2006 section: "He appeared to score a goal, but was ruled offside" --> "He appeared to score a goal, but it was ruled offside"