The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Nominator: Georgeykiwi ( talk · contribs) 00:33, 6 March 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Averageuntitleduser ( talk · contribs) 18:11, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
As promised. I remember seeing this guy around YouTube, it's nice to see him thriving as a musician! Averageuntitleduser ( talk) 18:11, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
The article reads smoothly. I don't see it too often, but I think the descriptions of his music scattered across the "Life and career" section work much in favor of the article. And I like the choice of keeping the "Artistry" section to broader descriptions and inspirations.
giving him a— perhaps: "to foster a", it feels a bit looser and prevents the two present participles in a row.
as well as his native language, English— this slightly implies that he learned English during the course, perhaps: "alongside".
followers— "subscribers", most readers would know the term or be able to extrapolate the meaning.
car journeys with his family— "family road trips"
"in your fucking face"-ness of her vocal production— perhaps: "punchy vocal production" or just remove "-ness of her".
At first glance, the sourcing looks pretty good, it's definitely improved since the last review. Dork, NME, AllMusic, Yorkshire Evening Post... there's some great material. The interviews seem to all be used for Marriott's words, or are otherwise passable, and the primary sources are used nicely for dates, charts, and the like. The Varsity and Redbrick articles are quite local, so as student newspapers, their uses seem alright. During my spot-check, paraphrasing seemed to be used well, and courtesy of the low Earwig score, over-quoting is not an issue. Otherwise, I'm going to challenge you on a few minor sources:
The Salisbury Journal ref was unexpected.. admittedly, good find! After looking through every source, and making some simple tweaks, I only have one issue:
Looks pretty good in this regard! His education, beginnings as a YouTuber, and transition to music seem balanced and thorough, despite the limited sources available. Some more sources about touring, but they aren't too reliable or usable. However:
Done Cut down on the information about "Denial" and added information on his go-to guitar when writing.
George (
talk)
23:08, 13 April 2024 (UTC)
Vandalism has stopped since the article became semi-protected, even then, there have been no major content disputes.
Images are relevant and abundant (no doubt thanks to your efforts). They all check out as public domain/own works.
I'm starting to like the format, so I think I'll do this review in batches. The article is looking quite solid already, nice work! Averageuntitleduser ( talk) 16:53, 10 April 2024 (UTC)
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
GA toolbox |
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Reviewing |
Article (
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visual edit |
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history) ·
Watch
Nominator: Georgeykiwi ( talk · contribs) 00:33, 6 March 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Averageuntitleduser ( talk · contribs) 18:11, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
As promised. I remember seeing this guy around YouTube, it's nice to see him thriving as a musician! Averageuntitleduser ( talk) 18:11, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
The article reads smoothly. I don't see it too often, but I think the descriptions of his music scattered across the "Life and career" section work much in favor of the article. And I like the choice of keeping the "Artistry" section to broader descriptions and inspirations.
giving him a— perhaps: "to foster a", it feels a bit looser and prevents the two present participles in a row.
as well as his native language, English— this slightly implies that he learned English during the course, perhaps: "alongside".
followers— "subscribers", most readers would know the term or be able to extrapolate the meaning.
car journeys with his family— "family road trips"
"in your fucking face"-ness of her vocal production— perhaps: "punchy vocal production" or just remove "-ness of her".
At first glance, the sourcing looks pretty good, it's definitely improved since the last review. Dork, NME, AllMusic, Yorkshire Evening Post... there's some great material. The interviews seem to all be used for Marriott's words, or are otherwise passable, and the primary sources are used nicely for dates, charts, and the like. The Varsity and Redbrick articles are quite local, so as student newspapers, their uses seem alright. During my spot-check, paraphrasing seemed to be used well, and courtesy of the low Earwig score, over-quoting is not an issue. Otherwise, I'm going to challenge you on a few minor sources:
The Salisbury Journal ref was unexpected.. admittedly, good find! After looking through every source, and making some simple tweaks, I only have one issue:
Looks pretty good in this regard! His education, beginnings as a YouTuber, and transition to music seem balanced and thorough, despite the limited sources available. Some more sources about touring, but they aren't too reliable or usable. However:
Done Cut down on the information about "Denial" and added information on his go-to guitar when writing.
George (
talk)
23:08, 13 April 2024 (UTC)
Vandalism has stopped since the article became semi-protected, even then, there have been no major content disputes.
Images are relevant and abundant (no doubt thanks to your efforts). They all check out as public domain/own works.
I'm starting to like the format, so I think I'll do this review in batches. The article is looking quite solid already, nice work! Averageuntitleduser ( talk) 16:53, 10 April 2024 (UTC)