There are a lot of links in the "See also" section. If links are used in the article as "main" articles under individual sections (i.e. the Igbo language link), then they don't need to be re-used in the See also section.
Lists are discouraged. The list in the Religion and rites of passage section could easily be turned into prose, and the individual words should not be bolded.
In the last paragraph of the Religion and rites of passage section, it says "Children are also required to greet elders when as a sign of respect and good upbringing." I believe there is something missing after the "when"; otherwise, the sentence doesn't make sense grammatically.
Due to my concerns about the sourcing (see below) I have not completed a complete prose check. Once I see improvements in the sourcing, I will conduct a full examination of the prose. However, due to the above issues, which I found in only a cursory check, I would suggest going over the article with an eye towards prose. It might also be a good idea to ask another editor who hasn't seen the article before to copyedit it for you.
I've added fact tags in several places where I would like to see references added. References are especially necessary when you say certain people are the "most famous" for this or that, when you say something is "popular" or for other opinion statements.
The formatting of the references needs to be standardized. You need to either use split referencing for all books or for none. The same goes for websites. I would suggest using split references for books and not for websites; this looks to be the best course of action for this article. You may do it as you wish, however, but just make sure that each type (books, websites, etc) are all the same within the type.
I have some serious concerns about the sourcing and prose in this article. There are several unreliable refs, absolutely no consistency in the formatting of references, and several places missing references. Also, in just a cursory check of the prose, I found several places that needed work. I am placing this article on hold for now, pending further work by the editors of the article. I do feel that this article can probably be brought up to GA status within a short period of time if the editors are dedicated to improving the article. If you have any questions, please let me know.
Dana boomer (
talk)
01:16, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
I'm starting a second set of comments, so that they don't get lost in the ones above.
I apologize if I wasn't clear about the See also section links. They should be in the individual sections, rather than the See also section. So, what I wanted you to do was take them out of the See also section, rather than out of the individual sections.
The lead is supposed to be a summary of the entire article, with no new information. For example, the lead states for a fact that almost a million died in the Nigerian-Biafran War, while in the text it states that it is believed that several million died, including many Igbos. Also, the lead spends too much time on the war while neglecting other areas. The War only takes up one paragraph in the body of the article (which is sufficient), but also takes up one full paragraph in the lead. I would suggest trimming the mention in the lead down to one or maybe two sentences. In its place, add a paragraph of information on the culture of the Igbos, which is almost completely neglected in the lead.
In the first paragraph of the "Identity" section, you say "Alexander X. Byrd argues," Who is Alexander Byrd? If he is a notable historian, add something like "Historian Alexander Byrd" and wikilink his name if he has a WP article.
He's not popular, I think. He's a a historian that wrote a book in the reference. I was trying to avoid 'some historians say...' but I've added that he's a professor Historian and rice university, which is his university I found this out on the university website
Here.
Ukabia (
talk)
22:50, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
In the "Traditional society" subsection, you say "Traditional Igbo political organization was based on a quasi-democratic
republican system of government that guaranteed equality of the citizenry as against a feudalist "dictator king" in tight knit communities as witnessed by the
Portuguese who first arrived and met with the Igbo people in the 15th century." This sentence is long and confusing in its comparison of republican tactics to feudalist kings. Please re-word and clarify.
In the last paragraph of the "Language and literature" section you say that Things Fall Apart is a novel. Being a novel means that it is fiction. Is this true?
In the "Dress" section, you say "beads were worn around the waist for medical reasons." Errr...medical?
lol, slight translation problem. In the Igbo language spiritual powers or tools were also classed and had the same name with medical 'power' and tools. I'll change to spiritual.
Ukabia (
talk)
22:39, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
When you have finished these corrections, please drop me a note here and I will take a final look over the article. It is much improved from your work over the past day, and I look forward to seeing even more of an improvement.
Dana boomer (
talk)
21:28, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
OK, so far things look good. I just have a one final comment, but it's fairly major:
Because Things Fall Apart is a novel, it cannot be used to source facts. For example:
In ref #112 it is used to source a fact about clothing.
I am also concerned about the use of the book "Understanding Things Fall Apart". Google won't let me see the page(s) that you are using in Refs 15 and 23. Is the information you're taking gleaned direction from Things Fall Apart and simply passed through this new book, or are they facts that were researched by the author of Understanding...?
I have fixed the links. The book talks about the context of the novel and talks about some of the history of the Igbo people including a timeline of Igbo history.
Ukabia (
talk)
01:55, 11 January 2009 (UTC)reply
Allright, everything looks good with the article, so I am going to pass it to GA status. Very nice work and thank you for all of your prompt responses.
Dana boomer (
talk)
02:28, 11 January 2009 (UTC)reply
There are a lot of links in the "See also" section. If links are used in the article as "main" articles under individual sections (i.e. the Igbo language link), then they don't need to be re-used in the See also section.
Lists are discouraged. The list in the Religion and rites of passage section could easily be turned into prose, and the individual words should not be bolded.
In the last paragraph of the Religion and rites of passage section, it says "Children are also required to greet elders when as a sign of respect and good upbringing." I believe there is something missing after the "when"; otherwise, the sentence doesn't make sense grammatically.
Due to my concerns about the sourcing (see below) I have not completed a complete prose check. Once I see improvements in the sourcing, I will conduct a full examination of the prose. However, due to the above issues, which I found in only a cursory check, I would suggest going over the article with an eye towards prose. It might also be a good idea to ask another editor who hasn't seen the article before to copyedit it for you.
I've added fact tags in several places where I would like to see references added. References are especially necessary when you say certain people are the "most famous" for this or that, when you say something is "popular" or for other opinion statements.
The formatting of the references needs to be standardized. You need to either use split referencing for all books or for none. The same goes for websites. I would suggest using split references for books and not for websites; this looks to be the best course of action for this article. You may do it as you wish, however, but just make sure that each type (books, websites, etc) are all the same within the type.
I have some serious concerns about the sourcing and prose in this article. There are several unreliable refs, absolutely no consistency in the formatting of references, and several places missing references. Also, in just a cursory check of the prose, I found several places that needed work. I am placing this article on hold for now, pending further work by the editors of the article. I do feel that this article can probably be brought up to GA status within a short period of time if the editors are dedicated to improving the article. If you have any questions, please let me know.
Dana boomer (
talk)
01:16, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
I'm starting a second set of comments, so that they don't get lost in the ones above.
I apologize if I wasn't clear about the See also section links. They should be in the individual sections, rather than the See also section. So, what I wanted you to do was take them out of the See also section, rather than out of the individual sections.
The lead is supposed to be a summary of the entire article, with no new information. For example, the lead states for a fact that almost a million died in the Nigerian-Biafran War, while in the text it states that it is believed that several million died, including many Igbos. Also, the lead spends too much time on the war while neglecting other areas. The War only takes up one paragraph in the body of the article (which is sufficient), but also takes up one full paragraph in the lead. I would suggest trimming the mention in the lead down to one or maybe two sentences. In its place, add a paragraph of information on the culture of the Igbos, which is almost completely neglected in the lead.
In the first paragraph of the "Identity" section, you say "Alexander X. Byrd argues," Who is Alexander Byrd? If he is a notable historian, add something like "Historian Alexander Byrd" and wikilink his name if he has a WP article.
He's not popular, I think. He's a a historian that wrote a book in the reference. I was trying to avoid 'some historians say...' but I've added that he's a professor Historian and rice university, which is his university I found this out on the university website
Here.
Ukabia (
talk)
22:50, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
In the "Traditional society" subsection, you say "Traditional Igbo political organization was based on a quasi-democratic
republican system of government that guaranteed equality of the citizenry as against a feudalist "dictator king" in tight knit communities as witnessed by the
Portuguese who first arrived and met with the Igbo people in the 15th century." This sentence is long and confusing in its comparison of republican tactics to feudalist kings. Please re-word and clarify.
In the last paragraph of the "Language and literature" section you say that Things Fall Apart is a novel. Being a novel means that it is fiction. Is this true?
In the "Dress" section, you say "beads were worn around the waist for medical reasons." Errr...medical?
lol, slight translation problem. In the Igbo language spiritual powers or tools were also classed and had the same name with medical 'power' and tools. I'll change to spiritual.
Ukabia (
talk)
22:39, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
When you have finished these corrections, please drop me a note here and I will take a final look over the article. It is much improved from your work over the past day, and I look forward to seeing even more of an improvement.
Dana boomer (
talk)
21:28, 10 January 2009 (UTC)reply
OK, so far things look good. I just have a one final comment, but it's fairly major:
Because Things Fall Apart is a novel, it cannot be used to source facts. For example:
In ref #112 it is used to source a fact about clothing.
I am also concerned about the use of the book "Understanding Things Fall Apart". Google won't let me see the page(s) that you are using in Refs 15 and 23. Is the information you're taking gleaned direction from Things Fall Apart and simply passed through this new book, or are they facts that were researched by the author of Understanding...?
I have fixed the links. The book talks about the context of the novel and talks about some of the history of the Igbo people including a timeline of Igbo history.
Ukabia (
talk)
01:55, 11 January 2009 (UTC)reply
Allright, everything looks good with the article, so I am going to pass it to GA status. Very nice work and thank you for all of your prompt responses.
Dana boomer (
talk)
02:28, 11 January 2009 (UTC)reply