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Reviewer: Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 18:22, 18 April 2020 (UTC)
@ AnuBalasubramanian: I will take this. You have been inactive since weeks so please note if there is no response from your side for more than a week from now I will have to fail this nom. The article can then be renominated once my concerns have been addressed. Cheers, Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 18:22, 18 April 2020 (UTC)
@ Sainsf: Thank you! I'm active and still able to make changes. AnuBalasubramanian ( talk) 18:28, 18 April 2020 (UTC)
The fly's lifespan has yet to be recorded in the wild... in New South Wales, in 1924.This does not belong in Description, which only lists physical features. This part belongs more in Habitat instead, and the discovery part has more to do with when it was described first I guess (part of Taxonomy).
H. mycetophaga are considered non-social insects, excepting the grouping inherent in their lekking behaviorThis line itself shows the Social behavior and all mating sections should be merged under one 'Social behavior' section whose first paragraph can be copied from the present Social behavior section and the rest can be subheadings describing lekking.
There are other fly species that have evolved...length of the inter-pulse interval also variesThis is not relevant to the subject at hand unless we directly compare them to this species.
Leks may have evolved away ... pheromones may be involved as wellIs this a general description of leks? Then it is again irrelevant to this article. You can go for details like
H. mycetophaga is one of few species of Hirtodrosophila that exhibits lek matingbut not descriptions of other general fly behavior. Female-initiated vs. male-initiated models and hotspot model, if described just as general fly behavior models, are again not relevant.
It is unknown if other environmental factors may influence which specific sites H. mycetophaga utilizes.
but averaged 17 days in the laboratoryIf this was based on the results of the particular study cited you can say 'but averaged 17 days in a 1998 laboratory study/experiment' so it does not give an impression that it is an average from many different studies (if that is not the case). Similar wording can be used here:
Researchers found that nine out of ten flies reappeared from one day to the next, either to the same fungus or to a nearby one.
makes mating displays easier to see'display' can be linked to Display (zoology). Other terms worth linking: spores, canopy, larvae, lek, territories, (link terms on their first mention in the main text even if they are linked in the lead; avoid dablinks)
Once a male H. mycetophaga comes to a lekIn general you can just say 'male'. It is understood you refer to the male of the species we are discussing (unless we are talking of multiple species somewhere in the text). Please ensure this is done consistently throughout the article
Females will either accept the male's advances by voluntarily assuming a copulatory position or reject the advances by raising her abdomenIt should be 'The female' at the start if 'she' raises 'her' abdomen. Similarly
In the event that other males attempt to copulate with the female, the original male will interrupt courtship to chase the other male awayshould say 'other males' at the end. There may be other instances where the wording might be incorrect.
displays wing-scissoring behaviorA few words to explain this would be great, I am not exactly able to picture it in my mind.
The authors of this paper confirm that collections of fliesMaybe merge this with the previous paragraph for better flow. Then you can omit 'of this paper' and say 'researchers' instead.
Immature H. mycetophaga in particularBetter say 'immature individuals'. There are several other instances I see where you can say 'individuals' instead of H. mycetophaga.
Flies intentionally space themselves as well as their progeny out from other fliesIs it true for all flies in general? This line
Only about 6% of males were seen outside leksdoes not seem to say so, in which case the previous line should be slightly reworded to not create confusion. Would also be good to start the 2nd line with 'In a study (maybe mention the year) only about...'
extinctions and re-appearances of rare rain forest species, like H. mycetophagaThis is the first mention of an interesting fact as this about the species. The article should try to cover more on this, possibly in an Evolution section.
More to come. Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 13:56, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
Okay these are all my comments for now. In summary:
I await your response. Needs quite some work but no hurry. Cheers, Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 14:57, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
Regarding Sainsf's comment on needing a taxonomy section: maybe that section could discuss the etymology of the name. 17:00, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
@ AnuBalasubramanian: Please respond by 28th, else this nom will be failed due to inactivity. Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 20:16, 23 April 2020 (UTC)
@ Sainsf: Hello! Sorry, didn't get the notifications for this. Will work on it as soon as I wrap up my final exams in a week or so.
@ AnuBalasubramanian: it has been nearly two weeks now without any activity here.. I am afraid a GA review can not remain open for too long especially with so many issues to be addressed. If you are busy in real life, it will be especially difficult for you to work on this right now. May be we can have this failed for now so that you can work on the article when you are free and then renominate it? I will leave this open for another 3 days for your response. Sainsf · (How ya doin'?) 16:16, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
@ Sainsf: Sounds good. The pandemic has interfered with my ability to work on this as I expected. I'll return to it whenever possible. Thanks again for your help with the edits. AnuBalasubramanian ( talk) 16:59, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
Sure AnuBalasubramanian. Stay safe :) Sainsf · (How ya doin'?) 17:27, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
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Reviewer: Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 18:22, 18 April 2020 (UTC)
@ AnuBalasubramanian: I will take this. You have been inactive since weeks so please note if there is no response from your side for more than a week from now I will have to fail this nom. The article can then be renominated once my concerns have been addressed. Cheers, Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 18:22, 18 April 2020 (UTC)
@ Sainsf: Thank you! I'm active and still able to make changes. AnuBalasubramanian ( talk) 18:28, 18 April 2020 (UTC)
The fly's lifespan has yet to be recorded in the wild... in New South Wales, in 1924.This does not belong in Description, which only lists physical features. This part belongs more in Habitat instead, and the discovery part has more to do with when it was described first I guess (part of Taxonomy).
H. mycetophaga are considered non-social insects, excepting the grouping inherent in their lekking behaviorThis line itself shows the Social behavior and all mating sections should be merged under one 'Social behavior' section whose first paragraph can be copied from the present Social behavior section and the rest can be subheadings describing lekking.
There are other fly species that have evolved...length of the inter-pulse interval also variesThis is not relevant to the subject at hand unless we directly compare them to this species.
Leks may have evolved away ... pheromones may be involved as wellIs this a general description of leks? Then it is again irrelevant to this article. You can go for details like
H. mycetophaga is one of few species of Hirtodrosophila that exhibits lek matingbut not descriptions of other general fly behavior. Female-initiated vs. male-initiated models and hotspot model, if described just as general fly behavior models, are again not relevant.
It is unknown if other environmental factors may influence which specific sites H. mycetophaga utilizes.
but averaged 17 days in the laboratoryIf this was based on the results of the particular study cited you can say 'but averaged 17 days in a 1998 laboratory study/experiment' so it does not give an impression that it is an average from many different studies (if that is not the case). Similar wording can be used here:
Researchers found that nine out of ten flies reappeared from one day to the next, either to the same fungus or to a nearby one.
makes mating displays easier to see'display' can be linked to Display (zoology). Other terms worth linking: spores, canopy, larvae, lek, territories, (link terms on their first mention in the main text even if they are linked in the lead; avoid dablinks)
Once a male H. mycetophaga comes to a lekIn general you can just say 'male'. It is understood you refer to the male of the species we are discussing (unless we are talking of multiple species somewhere in the text). Please ensure this is done consistently throughout the article
Females will either accept the male's advances by voluntarily assuming a copulatory position or reject the advances by raising her abdomenIt should be 'The female' at the start if 'she' raises 'her' abdomen. Similarly
In the event that other males attempt to copulate with the female, the original male will interrupt courtship to chase the other male awayshould say 'other males' at the end. There may be other instances where the wording might be incorrect.
displays wing-scissoring behaviorA few words to explain this would be great, I am not exactly able to picture it in my mind.
The authors of this paper confirm that collections of fliesMaybe merge this with the previous paragraph for better flow. Then you can omit 'of this paper' and say 'researchers' instead.
Immature H. mycetophaga in particularBetter say 'immature individuals'. There are several other instances I see where you can say 'individuals' instead of H. mycetophaga.
Flies intentionally space themselves as well as their progeny out from other fliesIs it true for all flies in general? This line
Only about 6% of males were seen outside leksdoes not seem to say so, in which case the previous line should be slightly reworded to not create confusion. Would also be good to start the 2nd line with 'In a study (maybe mention the year) only about...'
extinctions and re-appearances of rare rain forest species, like H. mycetophagaThis is the first mention of an interesting fact as this about the species. The article should try to cover more on this, possibly in an Evolution section.
More to come. Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 13:56, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
Okay these are all my comments for now. In summary:
I await your response. Needs quite some work but no hurry. Cheers, Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 14:57, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
Regarding Sainsf's comment on needing a taxonomy section: maybe that section could discuss the etymology of the name. 17:00, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
@ AnuBalasubramanian: Please respond by 28th, else this nom will be failed due to inactivity. Sainsf ( talk · contribs) 20:16, 23 April 2020 (UTC)
@ Sainsf: Hello! Sorry, didn't get the notifications for this. Will work on it as soon as I wrap up my final exams in a week or so.
@ AnuBalasubramanian: it has been nearly two weeks now without any activity here.. I am afraid a GA review can not remain open for too long especially with so many issues to be addressed. If you are busy in real life, it will be especially difficult for you to work on this right now. May be we can have this failed for now so that you can work on the article when you are free and then renominate it? I will leave this open for another 3 days for your response. Sainsf · (How ya doin'?) 16:16, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
@ Sainsf: Sounds good. The pandemic has interfered with my ability to work on this as I expected. I'll return to it whenever possible. Thanks again for your help with the edits. AnuBalasubramanian ( talk) 16:59, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
Sure AnuBalasubramanian. Stay safe :) Sainsf · (How ya doin'?) 17:27, 6 May 2020 (UTC)