speaks about growing up and learning to let go -> be more specific
maturity in the song -> ? Vocal maturity, lyrical maturity?
RIAA certifies for shipments, not sales or both
Not or more, for 1 million
The song reached the number one in Canada -> ce
in 1997 -> held on
It won in the category of Best R&B Song -> For better quality reading, try and incorporate this into the last sentence
set-list of three Houston's tours -> ce
selected -> select
You should introduce them as compilation albums, not just jump to their names
Background
1994, comma
novel of the same -> link
The film's director, Forest Whitaker, hired Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds to compose the soundtrack. Even after Babyface made his first visit to the set of the film, Houston was determined not to record songs for the soundtrack -> can be written better
She finally agreed after hearing Babyface play one of the songs -> which song?
"Exhale" was written and produced solely by Babyface -> seems kind of outta place
I couldn't come with words anymore -> come up?
According to Bronson, the song summarizes the movie's philosophy -> again, it seems king of out there, try incorporating it into a well structured sentence
Houston recorded the song[1] -> I think that part is kind of obvious, we don't need a source, also ce again
The second paragraph doesn't really fit in with "Background", maybe "Release"?
Composition
the bells resembled electronic Christmas bells, and that Houston ad-libs -> you wrote it like its a quote, which would need quotations. If not, fix it up to read better
Ted Cox, the author -> no "the"
wrote that -> don't write "wrote" unless its a direct quote, because he did not write that. Try, He felt etc.
Again here and -> "vocal colors".
Critical reception
most of them were -> most of which
were positive -> ?
Houston's maturity -> ?
the pop music -> remove "the"
gave a positive review -> the song or Exhale
"intoxicating". -> A lot of these
described the song as "shuffling". -> isn't there anything else he said except that one word?
gave a negative review -> again
Awards and accolades
The
27th ceremony -> annual
on February 26, 1997 -> commas, and held
45th ceremony -> again
Chart performance
(1992) remained atop the chart for eleven weeks -> (1992), which remained atop the chart for eleven weeks
shipments exceeding 1,000,000 copies or more -> again
a position which became its peak. -> ce, not well placed or written
This section seems very biased to other countries. While the song didn't achieve much success outside the US and Canada, you should expand the second paragraph a bit, instead of just listing peaks. Make it encyclopedic.
Music video
Pretty nice
Live performances
"Exhale (Shoop Shoop)" has been performed a number of times live -> doesn't read well
speaks about growing up and learning to let go -> be more specific
maturity in the song -> ? Vocal maturity, lyrical maturity?
RIAA certifies for shipments, not sales or both
Not or more, for 1 million
The song reached the number one in Canada -> ce
in 1997 -> held on
It won in the category of Best R&B Song -> For better quality reading, try and incorporate this into the last sentence
set-list of three Houston's tours -> ce
selected -> select
You should introduce them as compilation albums, not just jump to their names
Background
1994, comma
novel of the same -> link
The film's director, Forest Whitaker, hired Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds to compose the soundtrack. Even after Babyface made his first visit to the set of the film, Houston was determined not to record songs for the soundtrack -> can be written better
She finally agreed after hearing Babyface play one of the songs -> which song?
"Exhale" was written and produced solely by Babyface -> seems kind of outta place
I couldn't come with words anymore -> come up?
According to Bronson, the song summarizes the movie's philosophy -> again, it seems king of out there, try incorporating it into a well structured sentence
Houston recorded the song[1] -> I think that part is kind of obvious, we don't need a source, also ce again
The second paragraph doesn't really fit in with "Background", maybe "Release"?
Composition
the bells resembled electronic Christmas bells, and that Houston ad-libs -> you wrote it like its a quote, which would need quotations. If not, fix it up to read better
Ted Cox, the author -> no "the"
wrote that -> don't write "wrote" unless its a direct quote, because he did not write that. Try, He felt etc.
Again here and -> "vocal colors".
Critical reception
most of them were -> most of which
were positive -> ?
Houston's maturity -> ?
the pop music -> remove "the"
gave a positive review -> the song or Exhale
"intoxicating". -> A lot of these
described the song as "shuffling". -> isn't there anything else he said except that one word?
gave a negative review -> again
Awards and accolades
The
27th ceremony -> annual
on February 26, 1997 -> commas, and held
45th ceremony -> again
Chart performance
(1992) remained atop the chart for eleven weeks -> (1992), which remained atop the chart for eleven weeks
shipments exceeding 1,000,000 copies or more -> again
a position which became its peak. -> ce, not well placed or written
This section seems very biased to other countries. While the song didn't achieve much success outside the US and Canada, you should expand the second paragraph a bit, instead of just listing peaks. Make it encyclopedic.
Music video
Pretty nice
Live performances
"Exhale (Shoop Shoop)" has been performed a number of times live -> doesn't read well