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Reviewer: Kailash29792 ( talk · contribs) 06:50, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
Will review the article today, add comments tomorrow. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 06:50, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Lede
- Why is John Abraham billed over Abhishek in the infobox, but below him in the cast list? Better to follow one order, typically the film credits. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- You could mention that Mansukhani
- Plot
Flawless (at least in my perspective). I think the actor names can be removed from this section to avoid exceeding the 700-word limit, and avoid violating WP:OVERLINK. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Cast
Complies with WP:FILMCAST. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- I think majority of film articles follow this pattern, so I guess It's alright. Krish | Talk 10:19, 7 June 2017 (UTC)
- Production
- The image of John Abraham was taken in London, and is a violation of BH's free-images policy. Use an Indian image instead. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "Salim-Sulaiman" may be referred to as a duo. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- The caption could read: (L to R): Bachchan, Abraham and Chopra played the lead roles. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "turned down" sounds idiomatic. Perhaps "passed on" or "refused" could do? -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- According to Chopra, "For 'Fashion', I had to put on six kilos and later had to shed chip by chip as the character progressed in the film. My body structure in 'Dostana' is more toned than in 'Fashion' as it is a completely beach film" - even if the film names have single quotes in the source, they must not be so here. You may italicise them instead. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "Bikini tops" redirects to "bikini", which is already linked before. I think it can be de-linked. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "Dostana was filmed entirely in Miami" - I think only the main film was filmed entirely there, since the last para of filming states that the "Ma Da Laadla" remix video was shot in Mumbai (although I would not call it a part of the main storyline). Would it better if you say "almost entirely"? -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- The film was shot in Miami and only that promotional track was shot in the studio, which means the film was completely shot at one place. Krish | Talk 10:19, 7 June 2017 (UTC)
- Soundtrack
- You could refer to Vishal-Shekar as two people, and Vishal Dadlani as one half of the duo. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- They composed the songs only, right? Yet, why is there the category "Film scores by Vishal-Shekhar" and not in Salim-Sulaiman's name? -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Notes
- The note "Also for her role in Fashion" appears twice. Perhaps you could write
{{efn|name=Fashion|Also for her role in Fashion}}for one of the statements, then{{efn|name=Fashion}}for the other? Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Release
- "Behind-the-scenes" sounds colloquial. If the exact same words are used in the source, you may put it within quotes. Otherwise, retain the term but wikilink it to making-of. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "The producers teamed up with Facebook, which featured ads with each of the three lead actors urging users to form their own group" - you mean collaborated? And write the full form of ad: advertisement. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- @ Kailash29792: Done. Krish | Talk 10:19, 7 June 2017 (UTC)
- Final comments
I've done a thorough read of the article, and feel it is very much GA-worthy (in fact, even beyond). While I will pass this with no further questions, I feel this book can be used to further expand the article for a potential FAC. But congratulations anyway Krish! -- Kailash29792 (talk) 05:43, 8 June 2017 (UTC)
| GA toolbox |
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| Reviewing |
Article (
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visual edit |
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Article talk (
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Watch
Reviewer: Kailash29792 ( talk · contribs) 06:50, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
Will review the article today, add comments tomorrow. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 06:50, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Lede
- Why is John Abraham billed over Abhishek in the infobox, but below him in the cast list? Better to follow one order, typically the film credits. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- You could mention that Mansukhani
- Plot
Flawless (at least in my perspective). I think the actor names can be removed from this section to avoid exceeding the 700-word limit, and avoid violating WP:OVERLINK. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Cast
Complies with WP:FILMCAST. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- I think majority of film articles follow this pattern, so I guess It's alright. Krish | Talk 10:19, 7 June 2017 (UTC)
- Production
- The image of John Abraham was taken in London, and is a violation of BH's free-images policy. Use an Indian image instead. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "Salim-Sulaiman" may be referred to as a duo. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- The caption could read: (L to R): Bachchan, Abraham and Chopra played the lead roles. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "turned down" sounds idiomatic. Perhaps "passed on" or "refused" could do? -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- According to Chopra, "For 'Fashion', I had to put on six kilos and later had to shed chip by chip as the character progressed in the film. My body structure in 'Dostana' is more toned than in 'Fashion' as it is a completely beach film" - even if the film names have single quotes in the source, they must not be so here. You may italicise them instead. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "Bikini tops" redirects to "bikini", which is already linked before. I think it can be de-linked. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "Dostana was filmed entirely in Miami" - I think only the main film was filmed entirely there, since the last para of filming states that the "Ma Da Laadla" remix video was shot in Mumbai (although I would not call it a part of the main storyline). Would it better if you say "almost entirely"? -- Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- The film was shot in Miami and only that promotional track was shot in the studio, which means the film was completely shot at one place. Krish | Talk 10:19, 7 June 2017 (UTC)
- Soundtrack
- You could refer to Vishal-Shekar as two people, and Vishal Dadlani as one half of the duo. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- They composed the songs only, right? Yet, why is there the category "Film scores by Vishal-Shekhar" and not in Salim-Sulaiman's name? -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Notes
- The note "Also for her role in Fashion" appears twice. Perhaps you could write
{{efn|name=Fashion|Also for her role in Fashion}}for one of the statements, then{{efn|name=Fashion}}for the other? Kailash29792 (talk) 08:06, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- Release
- "Behind-the-scenes" sounds colloquial. If the exact same words are used in the source, you may put it within quotes. Otherwise, retain the term but wikilink it to making-of. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- "The producers teamed up with Facebook, which featured ads with each of the three lead actors urging users to form their own group" - you mean collaborated? And write the full form of ad: advertisement. -- Kailash29792 (talk) 14:49, 2 June 2017 (UTC)
- @ Kailash29792: Done. Krish | Talk 10:19, 7 June 2017 (UTC)
- Final comments
I've done a thorough read of the article, and feel it is very much GA-worthy (in fact, even beyond). While I will pass this with no further questions, I feel this book can be used to further expand the article for a potential FAC. But congratulations anyway Krish! -- Kailash29792 (talk) 05:43, 8 June 2017 (UTC)