The image caption says "ZX Spectrum cover art", but seeing as how the game does not appear to have been released for any other system, it should probably just be "Cover art".
Force of habit, removed JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Arcade is a platform, not a genre
I've removed arcade and added the action-platform genre JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Lead
Similarly, remove arcade from arcade-action here.
Done as above JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"and attempts to escape" --> and attempt to escape
Cookie was one of the very few Spectrum games and the one of four Ultimate games" --> Cookie was one of the few Spectrum games and one of only four Ultimate games
Rephrased JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
As a caveat to this, "and the one of four Ultimate games" in the original sentence is not supported in the body of the article, so either remove it from the lead, or add it to the article body with a reliable source.
Removed "and the one of four Ultimate games". I remember seeing the statement in a couple of print magazines, but it was probably for the review of another game I was working on at the time JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"A version was also created for the BBC Micro but was not" --> Place a comma between Micro and but.
"with critics praising the graphics however criticising the hard difficulty" --> with critics praising the graphics, but criticising the hard difficulty
Rephrased JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Gameplay
"from a single 2D perspective and the main objective" --> from a single, 2D perspective, and the main objective
Removed JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"who will jump out of the pantry" -- Does this mean all of them, or just Colonel Custard? Because if it's all of them, place 'all' between will and jump.
All of them. I've rephrased to make it sound clearer JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"simultaneously, if the player" -- Place 'and' before if.
Overall, well done with this article. It should be easy enough to enact the changes above and then it should be good to go.--十八 02:50, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
@
Juhachi: thanks for the review again! I think I've addressed everything here. This is probably the shortest article I've sent to GAN, and unfortunately the length can't be helped due to the fact that old games like these were literally developed in people's attics (it also doesn't help that Ultimate was a very secretive company). I'm likely to make a few minor syntax errors when writing this up in one day, so thanks for pointing them out! JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Good work again, though I once again went back and updated the FURs in the images as I did on Blackwyche. But everything else looks good, so I'll pass this one for GA as well.--十八 20:35, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
The image caption says "ZX Spectrum cover art", but seeing as how the game does not appear to have been released for any other system, it should probably just be "Cover art".
Force of habit, removed JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Arcade is a platform, not a genre
I've removed arcade and added the action-platform genre JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Lead
Similarly, remove arcade from arcade-action here.
Done as above JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"and attempts to escape" --> and attempt to escape
Cookie was one of the very few Spectrum games and the one of four Ultimate games" --> Cookie was one of the few Spectrum games and one of only four Ultimate games
Rephrased JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
As a caveat to this, "and the one of four Ultimate games" in the original sentence is not supported in the body of the article, so either remove it from the lead, or add it to the article body with a reliable source.
Removed "and the one of four Ultimate games". I remember seeing the statement in a couple of print magazines, but it was probably for the review of another game I was working on at the time JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"A version was also created for the BBC Micro but was not" --> Place a comma between Micro and but.
"with critics praising the graphics however criticising the hard difficulty" --> with critics praising the graphics, but criticising the hard difficulty
Rephrased JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Gameplay
"from a single 2D perspective and the main objective" --> from a single, 2D perspective, and the main objective
Removed JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"who will jump out of the pantry" -- Does this mean all of them, or just Colonel Custard? Because if it's all of them, place 'all' between will and jump.
All of them. I've rephrased to make it sound clearer JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
"simultaneously, if the player" -- Place 'and' before if.
Overall, well done with this article. It should be easy enough to enact the changes above and then it should be good to go.--十八 02:50, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
@
Juhachi: thanks for the review again! I think I've addressed everything here. This is probably the shortest article I've sent to GAN, and unfortunately the length can't be helped due to the fact that old games like these were literally developed in people's attics (it also doesn't help that Ultimate was a very secretive company). I'm likely to make a few minor syntax errors when writing this up in one day, so thanks for pointing them out! JAGUAR 14:57, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply
Good work again, though I once again went back and updated the FURs in the images as I did on Blackwyche. But everything else looks good, so I'll pass this one for GA as well.--十八 20:35, 16 September 2015 (UTC)reply