![]() | Chicago and North Western 1385 is currently a Transport good article nominee. Nominated by Someone who likes train writing ( talk) at 20:25, 9 June 2024 (UTC) An editor has placed this article on hold to allow improvements to be made to satisfy the good article criteria. Recommendations have been left on the review page, and editors have seven days to address these issues. Improvements made in this period will influence the reviewer's decision whether or not to list the article as a good article. Short description: Preserved American 4-6-0 locomotive |
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Reviewing |
Nominator: Someone who likes train writing ( talk · contribs) 20:25, 9 June 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Sammi Brie ( talk · contribs) 15:10, 7 July 2024 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Overall: |
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You have work to do, but you can do it. Pull back a little bit on the historical detail. It's tough, but this is not Anorakipedia, and sometimes specialized topic editors have to learn to shear their sheep and write at summary style. (I am familiar with this dynamic in my own specialty.) A description of the train would also help a lot. There are also various copy tweaks, especially MOS:GEOCOMMA. Ping me when done. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 19:08, 7 July 2024 (UTC)
Since it had several months of flue time left, which begs the question what flue time means. Most people would have no idea.
The discovered cause of the failure was a nipple bolt breaching open, resulting in one superheater unit bending out of shape. The removal, repairs, and re-installation of the superheater took twelve hours for twenty members and all the museum volunteers to complete, and the progress was monitored and televised by a Milwaukee television crew.These sentences contain a lot of technical detail. While they show you have a strong understanding of the subject, I'm a train fanatic and even I don't know what a nipple bolt is. I would condense this, and some earlier sentences, into something along the lines of
On July 7, 1987, No. 1385 was tasked to lead that year's Great Circus Train, but as it began to depart Baraboo, the R-1 suffered a superheater failure and sputtered. Upon return to the MCMR, the failure was traced to a faulty bolt, and the superheater was repaired by volunteers in twelve hours. The repairs were documented by a television crew from Milwaukee.My version cuts the character count from 664 characters to 360, while still hitting on the key points. I may not have done this perfectly and if there's anything important I cut out it can be added back in, but I hope it shows the idea I'm pressing upon that you can convey the same information more concisely. The key points from this paragraph are the superheater failure, and that the museum volunteers did the repair in record time. Trainsandotherthings ( talk) 00:36, 9 July 2024 (UTC)
Did you know? If you fancy doing so, I always have plenty of GA nominees to review. Just look for the all-uppercase titles in the Television section. Reviews always appreciated.
There are two broad changes that are needed:
Throughout this article:
Encouragement: Get set up with Newspapers.com via the Wikipedia Library to clip news articles (I did this for the 1994 Baraboo item as an example). This will make your life easier if you use a lot of historic newspapers. I can provide further assistance. User:Sammi Brie/Clipping is my guide to clipping articles for Wikipedia use (something I'm highly familiar with, as I have on the order of 35,000 clippings).
My typical practice is to do a random spot-check, but I can't spot-check the offline sources, nor do I have access to the run of Trains, so I've had to be a bit judicious in what I can spot-check. The references I can't look to be reliable specialist material.
While he bought some new tools for the job, Roudebush had to custom make others himself to do the work required.
The article has three images: a Carol Highsmith PD image and two images with CC licenses. No issues. Encouragement: Add alt text for users with screen readers. (I see this was done since I started)
![]() | Chicago and North Western 1385 is currently a Transport good article nominee. Nominated by Someone who likes train writing ( talk) at 20:25, 9 June 2024 (UTC) An editor has placed this article on hold to allow improvements to be made to satisfy the good article criteria. Recommendations have been left on the review page, and editors have seven days to address these issues. Improvements made in this period will influence the reviewer's decision whether or not to list the article as a good article. Short description: Preserved American 4-6-0 locomotive |
![]() | This article is rated Start-class on Wikipedia's
content assessment scale. It is of interest to the following WikiProjects: | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
GA toolbox |
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Reviewing |
Nominator: Someone who likes train writing ( talk · contribs) 20:25, 9 June 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Sammi Brie ( talk · contribs) 15:10, 7 July 2024 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Overall: |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
You have work to do, but you can do it. Pull back a little bit on the historical detail. It's tough, but this is not Anorakipedia, and sometimes specialized topic editors have to learn to shear their sheep and write at summary style. (I am familiar with this dynamic in my own specialty.) A description of the train would also help a lot. There are also various copy tweaks, especially MOS:GEOCOMMA. Ping me when done. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 19:08, 7 July 2024 (UTC)
Since it had several months of flue time left, which begs the question what flue time means. Most people would have no idea.
The discovered cause of the failure was a nipple bolt breaching open, resulting in one superheater unit bending out of shape. The removal, repairs, and re-installation of the superheater took twelve hours for twenty members and all the museum volunteers to complete, and the progress was monitored and televised by a Milwaukee television crew.These sentences contain a lot of technical detail. While they show you have a strong understanding of the subject, I'm a train fanatic and even I don't know what a nipple bolt is. I would condense this, and some earlier sentences, into something along the lines of
On July 7, 1987, No. 1385 was tasked to lead that year's Great Circus Train, but as it began to depart Baraboo, the R-1 suffered a superheater failure and sputtered. Upon return to the MCMR, the failure was traced to a faulty bolt, and the superheater was repaired by volunteers in twelve hours. The repairs were documented by a television crew from Milwaukee.My version cuts the character count from 664 characters to 360, while still hitting on the key points. I may not have done this perfectly and if there's anything important I cut out it can be added back in, but I hope it shows the idea I'm pressing upon that you can convey the same information more concisely. The key points from this paragraph are the superheater failure, and that the museum volunteers did the repair in record time. Trainsandotherthings ( talk) 00:36, 9 July 2024 (UTC)
Did you know? If you fancy doing so, I always have plenty of GA nominees to review. Just look for the all-uppercase titles in the Television section. Reviews always appreciated.
There are two broad changes that are needed:
Throughout this article:
Encouragement: Get set up with Newspapers.com via the Wikipedia Library to clip news articles (I did this for the 1994 Baraboo item as an example). This will make your life easier if you use a lot of historic newspapers. I can provide further assistance. User:Sammi Brie/Clipping is my guide to clipping articles for Wikipedia use (something I'm highly familiar with, as I have on the order of 35,000 clippings).
My typical practice is to do a random spot-check, but I can't spot-check the offline sources, nor do I have access to the run of Trains, so I've had to be a bit judicious in what I can spot-check. The references I can't look to be reliable specialist material.
While he bought some new tools for the job, Roudebush had to custom make others himself to do the work required.
The article has three images: a Carol Highsmith PD image and two images with CC licenses. No issues. Encouragement: Add alt text for users with screen readers. (I see this was done since I started)