The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Bennett and Gaga first met backstage in 2011, after performing at the
Robin Hood Foundation gala in
New York City. → Had they performed together then? Slightly ambiguous.
The two later recorded a rendition of "
The Lady Is a Tramp", and began discussing plans for working on a jazz project. → Something isn't working for me here. Would it be more clear to say that Bennett asked Gaga to cover "The Lady is a Tramp" with him, which started the ball rolling about a collaboration album?
Gaga deviated from her characteristic
pop tracks, wanting instead authentic jazz sounding vocals. → This sentence doesn't make sense. Are you talking about the style of songs or the way in which she sings them?
was announced by Gaga and Bennett → Slightly OCD but the opening sentence of the lead says Bennett and Gaga, here says Gaga and Bennett. Choose one and stick to it for continuity.
Swing band and Grammy-award nominated songwriter/composer Marion Evans was → Swing band and Grammy-award nominated songwriter/composer Marion Evans were
also under consideration for collaborating on the album with Bennett confirming recording sessions to start soon. → also under consideration for collaborating on the album; Bennett confirmed recording sessions would start soon after.
On January 8, 2013, Evans, who arranged "The Lady Is a Tramp", confirmed that he would have a fairly significant part in the making of the album, → So many commas here
The next two weeks, although album sales dropped, Cheek to Cheek held its position at number four on the Billboard 200, with sales of 59,000 and 37,000 copies respectively. → Doesn't flow properly, and I don't think we need this trajectory.
Is Gaga the first act to have number-one albums on the Dance and Jazz albums? It's quite an unusual combination. Would be great if this could potentially be sourced from somewhere.
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Bennett and Gaga first met backstage in 2011, after performing at the
Robin Hood Foundation gala in
New York City. → Had they performed together then? Slightly ambiguous.
The two later recorded a rendition of "
The Lady Is a Tramp", and began discussing plans for working on a jazz project. → Something isn't working for me here. Would it be more clear to say that Bennett asked Gaga to cover "The Lady is a Tramp" with him, which started the ball rolling about a collaboration album?
Gaga deviated from her characteristic
pop tracks, wanting instead authentic jazz sounding vocals. → This sentence doesn't make sense. Are you talking about the style of songs or the way in which she sings them?
was announced by Gaga and Bennett → Slightly OCD but the opening sentence of the lead says Bennett and Gaga, here says Gaga and Bennett. Choose one and stick to it for continuity.
Swing band and Grammy-award nominated songwriter/composer Marion Evans was → Swing band and Grammy-award nominated songwriter/composer Marion Evans were
also under consideration for collaborating on the album with Bennett confirming recording sessions to start soon. → also under consideration for collaborating on the album; Bennett confirmed recording sessions would start soon after.
On January 8, 2013, Evans, who arranged "The Lady Is a Tramp", confirmed that he would have a fairly significant part in the making of the album, → So many commas here
The next two weeks, although album sales dropped, Cheek to Cheek held its position at number four on the Billboard 200, with sales of 59,000 and 37,000 copies respectively. → Doesn't flow properly, and I don't think we need this trajectory.
Is Gaga the first act to have number-one albums on the Dance and Jazz albums? It's quite an unusual combination. Would be great if this could potentially be sourced from somewhere.
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.