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Nominator: Roc0ast3r ( talk · contribs) 02:39, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Mike Christie ( talk · contribs) 22:12, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
I'll review this.
Mike Christie (
talk -
contribs -
library)
22:12, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
The coat of arms images are appropriately tagged. Sources are reliable. Spotchecks (footnote numbers refer to this version):
- FN 11 cites "they married on 28 December in the Chapel of the Royal Hospital Chelsea". Verified.
- FN 12 cites "In 1965, Tottenham was second in line to become Marquess of Ely. Upon the death of Guy Alvo Greville Loftus, Tottenham became the heir apparent." Verified.
- FN 3 cites "At the Royal Military College of Canada, Tottenham became an assistant librarian and French teacher. He soon worked as a translator at an insurance company before being employed as a language teacher at Trinity College School in Port Hope, Ontario." Verified, but why "soon"?
- Modified to "later". RONIN TALK 01:26, 9 July 2024 (UTC)
Spotcheck passes. I'll read through the content next and post any comments below. Mike Christie ( talk - contribs - library) 22:32, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
Earwig finds no issues. I just have one suggestion from a read-through:
- Tottenham was entitled to sit in the House of Lords until 1999 because of his subsidiary title of Baron Loftus. I don't think a casual reader will understand that that means that the subsidiary title is not in the Peerage of Ireland. It's such a short article that you don't want a digression about this in the body of the article, but how about adding a footnote that explains that the lower title was in the Peerage of England?
The above is a minor point and I'm not going to hold up GA over it; up to you if you want to make that change. I'll go ahead and pass this now. Mike Christie ( talk - contribs - library) 10:47, 9 July 2024 (UTC)
- Thank you! For your suggestion, I think that the current text explains that:
In the Peerage of the United Kingdom, the Marquess of Ely is concurrently Baron Loftus, entitling the Marquess to a seat in the House of Lords. As a result, Tottenham sat in the House as Baron Loftus ...
, but I agree that the sentence might not be the most clear. I went ahead and changed that sentence. RONIN TALK 15:40, 9 July 2024 (UTC)
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Nominator: Roc0ast3r ( talk · contribs) 02:39, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Mike Christie ( talk · contribs) 22:12, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
I'll review this.
Mike Christie (
talk -
contribs -
library)
22:12, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
The coat of arms images are appropriately tagged. Sources are reliable. Spotchecks (footnote numbers refer to this version):
- FN 11 cites "they married on 28 December in the Chapel of the Royal Hospital Chelsea". Verified.
- FN 12 cites "In 1965, Tottenham was second in line to become Marquess of Ely. Upon the death of Guy Alvo Greville Loftus, Tottenham became the heir apparent." Verified.
- FN 3 cites "At the Royal Military College of Canada, Tottenham became an assistant librarian and French teacher. He soon worked as a translator at an insurance company before being employed as a language teacher at Trinity College School in Port Hope, Ontario." Verified, but why "soon"?
- Modified to "later". RONIN TALK 01:26, 9 July 2024 (UTC)
Spotcheck passes. I'll read through the content next and post any comments below. Mike Christie ( talk - contribs - library) 22:32, 8 July 2024 (UTC)
Earwig finds no issues. I just have one suggestion from a read-through:
- Tottenham was entitled to sit in the House of Lords until 1999 because of his subsidiary title of Baron Loftus. I don't think a casual reader will understand that that means that the subsidiary title is not in the Peerage of Ireland. It's such a short article that you don't want a digression about this in the body of the article, but how about adding a footnote that explains that the lower title was in the Peerage of England?
The above is a minor point and I'm not going to hold up GA over it; up to you if you want to make that change. I'll go ahead and pass this now. Mike Christie ( talk - contribs - library) 10:47, 9 July 2024 (UTC)
- Thank you! For your suggestion, I think that the current text explains that:
In the Peerage of the United Kingdom, the Marquess of Ely is concurrently Baron Loftus, entitling the Marquess to a seat in the House of Lords. As a result, Tottenham sat in the House as Baron Loftus ...
, but I agree that the sentence might not be the most clear. I went ahead and changed that sentence. RONIN TALK 15:40, 9 July 2024 (UTC)