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Reviewer: Aircorn ( talk · contribs) 02:24, 5 October 2020 (UTC)
Willing to take this on in the next few days. Can I just confirm that Lizzy150 is free to answer any queries? AIRcorn (talk) 02:24, 5 October 2020 (UTC)
Jack broaches the subject of creating a life with Ennis on a small ranch, but Ennis, haunted by a childhood memory of the torture and murder of two men suspected of homosexual behavior as well as unwilling to abandon his family, refuses.This sentence is a little awkward.
Gyllenhaal also reacted to the script positively; when he discovered that Lee and friend Ledger were attached to the project, Gyllenhaal signed on.This makes it sound like the main reason he signed on was because of Lee and Ledger. Is this correct. Also isn't the comma superfluous?
a masculine and homophobic characterIf this is the case it probably should be brought up in the plot section somehow
To prepare, Ledger researched his character's personal traits, Wyoming and Texas accentsThis doesn't make sense to me. Do you mean personal traits plus Wyoming and Texas accents?
She was wearing a ball gown and hairpiece "that was way over the top", but still felt "centred and focused".The hairpiece was centered and focused or she was?
The fictional "Brokeback Mountain" was named to suggest a physical feature, after a term usedor a swaybacked horse or mule.Not sure what is meant by "to suggest a physical feature"?
Initially, Alberta's environmental department prohibited the crew from bringing domestic sheep into the countryI don't think this is true. Canada has sheep, it seems they didn't want the sheep in the Rockies.
Over the Christmas weekend, and beginning of January 2006, film expanded into more domestic theaters.Grammar
falsely accusing him of a repellent form of bigotry".Not clear what they accused him of?
Brokeback Mountain was listed on the following notable critics' top-ten lists.Should clarify that this is 2005 lists. The list is very American centric. I am actually not sure the list itself is due. Maybe better to add it too the paragraph above and say something along the lines that it was the top ranked film of 2005 by .........
Audiences and the cast and crew disagreed as to whether the film's two protagonists were homosexual, bisexual, heterosexual, or should be free of any sexual orientation classification.I am not sure audiences disagreeing is notable. They tend to disagree on a lot of films. Maybe critics?
@ Lizzy150: I think this covers most things. Don't feel like you have to do everything I have suggested (although I do appreciate replies to any points I make, even if it is just to disagree with them). Ping or drop a talk page note when you are ready for me to have another look at it or you want further clarification. AIRcorn (talk) 05:27, 8 October 2020 (UTC)
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Reviewer: Aircorn ( talk · contribs) 02:24, 5 October 2020 (UTC)
Willing to take this on in the next few days. Can I just confirm that Lizzy150 is free to answer any queries? AIRcorn (talk) 02:24, 5 October 2020 (UTC)
Jack broaches the subject of creating a life with Ennis on a small ranch, but Ennis, haunted by a childhood memory of the torture and murder of two men suspected of homosexual behavior as well as unwilling to abandon his family, refuses.This sentence is a little awkward.
Gyllenhaal also reacted to the script positively; when he discovered that Lee and friend Ledger were attached to the project, Gyllenhaal signed on.This makes it sound like the main reason he signed on was because of Lee and Ledger. Is this correct. Also isn't the comma superfluous?
a masculine and homophobic characterIf this is the case it probably should be brought up in the plot section somehow
To prepare, Ledger researched his character's personal traits, Wyoming and Texas accentsThis doesn't make sense to me. Do you mean personal traits plus Wyoming and Texas accents?
She was wearing a ball gown and hairpiece "that was way over the top", but still felt "centred and focused".The hairpiece was centered and focused or she was?
The fictional "Brokeback Mountain" was named to suggest a physical feature, after a term usedor a swaybacked horse or mule.Not sure what is meant by "to suggest a physical feature"?
Initially, Alberta's environmental department prohibited the crew from bringing domestic sheep into the countryI don't think this is true. Canada has sheep, it seems they didn't want the sheep in the Rockies.
Over the Christmas weekend, and beginning of January 2006, film expanded into more domestic theaters.Grammar
falsely accusing him of a repellent form of bigotry".Not clear what they accused him of?
Brokeback Mountain was listed on the following notable critics' top-ten lists.Should clarify that this is 2005 lists. The list is very American centric. I am actually not sure the list itself is due. Maybe better to add it too the paragraph above and say something along the lines that it was the top ranked film of 2005 by .........
Audiences and the cast and crew disagreed as to whether the film's two protagonists were homosexual, bisexual, heterosexual, or should be free of any sexual orientation classification.I am not sure audiences disagreeing is notable. They tend to disagree on a lot of films. Maybe critics?
@ Lizzy150: I think this covers most things. Don't feel like you have to do everything I have suggested (although I do appreciate replies to any points I make, even if it is just to disagree with them). Ping or drop a talk page note when you are ready for me to have another look at it or you want further clarification. AIRcorn (talk) 05:27, 8 October 2020 (UTC)