From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Bermuda at the 2018 Winter Olympics/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Nova Crystallis ( talk · contribs) 06:04, 21 July 2018 (UTC) reply


Reviewing later.  Nova Crystallis (Talk) 06:04, 21 July 2018 (UTC) reply

  • "This was the nation's eighth appearance in the Winter Olympics." Bermuda is not a nation.
  • "cross-country skier Tucker Murphy. He finished his only event in 104th place." Merge to "cross-country skier Tucker Murphy, who finished his only event in 104th place."
  • made their Winter Olympic Games debut in 1992 at the Albertville Games; and have appeared in every Olympics since their respective debuts bar one" Replace semicolon with comma.
  • "THe delegation also consisted of Murphy's coach, Pepa Miloucheva; his waxer Jeff Shaw; the chef de mission Lawrence Murphy; and Sean Field-Lament, who represented the Bermuda Olympic Association's executive board." Use commas instead of semicolon and fix the first word.
  • ", and for the closing ceremony." No need for comma.
  • Remove third link to Tucker Murphy in prose, unnecessary for an article this short.
  • "Murphy made his third straight appearance at the Winter Olympics. He was 36 years old at the time of these Olympics." Merge the two sentences.
  • "He finished the men's 15 km freestyle in a time of 43 minutes and 5 seconds, which was good for 104th place. He was more than nine minutes behind the gold medallist, Dario Cologna of Switzerland." Same here.

A few things.  Nova Crystallis (Talk) 23:32, 21 July 2018 (UTC) reply

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Bermuda at the 2018 Winter Olympics/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Nova Crystallis ( talk · contribs) 06:04, 21 July 2018 (UTC) reply


Reviewing later.  Nova Crystallis (Talk) 06:04, 21 July 2018 (UTC) reply

  • "This was the nation's eighth appearance in the Winter Olympics." Bermuda is not a nation.
  • "cross-country skier Tucker Murphy. He finished his only event in 104th place." Merge to "cross-country skier Tucker Murphy, who finished his only event in 104th place."
  • made their Winter Olympic Games debut in 1992 at the Albertville Games; and have appeared in every Olympics since their respective debuts bar one" Replace semicolon with comma.
  • "THe delegation also consisted of Murphy's coach, Pepa Miloucheva; his waxer Jeff Shaw; the chef de mission Lawrence Murphy; and Sean Field-Lament, who represented the Bermuda Olympic Association's executive board." Use commas instead of semicolon and fix the first word.
  • ", and for the closing ceremony." No need for comma.
  • Remove third link to Tucker Murphy in prose, unnecessary for an article this short.
  • "Murphy made his third straight appearance at the Winter Olympics. He was 36 years old at the time of these Olympics." Merge the two sentences.
  • "He finished the men's 15 km freestyle in a time of 43 minutes and 5 seconds, which was good for 104th place. He was more than nine minutes behind the gold medallist, Dario Cologna of Switzerland." Same here.

A few things.  Nova Crystallis (Talk) 23:32, 21 July 2018 (UTC) reply


Videos

Youtube | Vimeo | Bing

Websites

Google | Yahoo | Bing

Encyclopedia

Google | Yahoo | Bing

Facebook