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Reviewer: ChrisGualtieri ( talk · contribs) 05:29, 6 January 2014 (UTC) I'll take this. ChrisGualtieri ( talk) 05:29, 6 January 2014 (UTC)
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Comments: This article has several issues. It fails WP:LEAD. Several of the images are of questionable relevance, blurry and undescript, they add little if anything to the article. Words to watch and possible OR on pieces like: "probably the powerful new Taube Albatros D.III," - this is speculation. The article needs a copy edit for other issues like "On 19 January aerial reconnaissance found the Ottoman Army had evacuated El Kossaima and the strength of the main desert base at Hafir el Auja had decreased." This needs a citation saying "who" thought that, " However, it was thought that Ottoman garrisons would continue to hold onto the Nekhl area in the center of the Sinai Peninsula, including the villages of Bir el Hassana, Gebel Helal, Gebel Yelleg and Gebel el Heitan." From word choice "However, on 17 February when the columns were approaching the area, reconnaissance aircraft found the Ottoman garrisons had retired." And lack of inline citations per MINREF for "To address the problem of Ottoman Army units in the rear of the advancing EEF, a Raid on Nekhl was carried out by two columns of light horse and yeomanry. The two columns moved out from Serapeum, near Ismailia on the Suez Canal, with three aircraft in support to attack Nekhl 60 miles (97 km) to the east." And that's just one paragraph. Entire quotes from "R. M. Downes" that should be paraphrased as they add nothing of context that could not be summarized in paraphrasing. More word choice with "Chauvel had reconnoitred the El Magruntein". Final assaults also has citation and specific and copy editing issues.
Plenty of sections have several problems all in one: "These guns were also well positioned to provide cover if pressure by the Ottoman reinforcements from Khan Yunus and Shellal proved too strong for the two troops of Wellingtons, or if the New Zealand Mounted Rifles Brigade was forced to retire to the coast."
All these issues need to be cited and plenty more, because they are very specific claims. Given the situation, the article needs someone who has these sources to verify and address the issues and some of it does seem to be OR. I'll leave this up for awhile incase someone can fix it, but otherwise I'll have to fail it. ChrisGualtieri ( talk) 17:51, 20 January 2014 (UTC)
The citations are at the end of the paragraphs but they could be added at the end of the sentences, if required. -- Rskp ( talk) 02:26, 21 January 2014 (UTC)
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Reviewer: ChrisGualtieri ( talk · contribs) 05:29, 6 January 2014 (UTC) I'll take this. ChrisGualtieri ( talk) 05:29, 6 January 2014 (UTC)
Good Article Checklist
Good Article review progress box
|
Comments: This article has several issues. It fails WP:LEAD. Several of the images are of questionable relevance, blurry and undescript, they add little if anything to the article. Words to watch and possible OR on pieces like: "probably the powerful new Taube Albatros D.III," - this is speculation. The article needs a copy edit for other issues like "On 19 January aerial reconnaissance found the Ottoman Army had evacuated El Kossaima and the strength of the main desert base at Hafir el Auja had decreased." This needs a citation saying "who" thought that, " However, it was thought that Ottoman garrisons would continue to hold onto the Nekhl area in the center of the Sinai Peninsula, including the villages of Bir el Hassana, Gebel Helal, Gebel Yelleg and Gebel el Heitan." From word choice "However, on 17 February when the columns were approaching the area, reconnaissance aircraft found the Ottoman garrisons had retired." And lack of inline citations per MINREF for "To address the problem of Ottoman Army units in the rear of the advancing EEF, a Raid on Nekhl was carried out by two columns of light horse and yeomanry. The two columns moved out from Serapeum, near Ismailia on the Suez Canal, with three aircraft in support to attack Nekhl 60 miles (97 km) to the east." And that's just one paragraph. Entire quotes from "R. M. Downes" that should be paraphrased as they add nothing of context that could not be summarized in paraphrasing. More word choice with "Chauvel had reconnoitred the El Magruntein". Final assaults also has citation and specific and copy editing issues.
Plenty of sections have several problems all in one: "These guns were also well positioned to provide cover if pressure by the Ottoman reinforcements from Khan Yunus and Shellal proved too strong for the two troops of Wellingtons, or if the New Zealand Mounted Rifles Brigade was forced to retire to the coast."
All these issues need to be cited and plenty more, because they are very specific claims. Given the situation, the article needs someone who has these sources to verify and address the issues and some of it does seem to be OR. I'll leave this up for awhile incase someone can fix it, but otherwise I'll have to fail it. ChrisGualtieri ( talk) 17:51, 20 January 2014 (UTC)
The citations are at the end of the paragraphs but they could be added at the end of the sentences, if required. -- Rskp ( talk) 02:26, 21 January 2014 (UTC)