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Reviewer: Zawed ( talk · contribs) 06:49, 25 April 2023 (UTC) reply

I will take a look at this one. Zawed ( talk) 06:49, 25 April 2023 (UTC) reply

Lead

• ...guarded by an ironclad be further...: is the "be" supposed to be there?
  • Rephrased. The grammar made sense in my mind, but that doesn't mean much
• Confederate vessels:...: I think the colon should be a comma?
  • Yes, corrected
• The Federal ironclads had lighter drafts than the Confederate vessels,...: I don't think lighter is quite right when referring to draft. Shallower would be better but that is used later in the sentence, so how about " The Federal ironclads had a reduced draft relative to the Confederate vessels,..."?
  • Actually, for this context, it generally works. For instance, the later tinclad warships were often known as "light drafts" because of their shallower drafts
    • Oh OK - I hadn't seen it expressed like that before. Zawed ( talk) 04:17, 29 April 2023 (UTC) reply

Background

• In the first paragraph, the phrase "In February 1862" is used twice.
  • Fixed
• Captain Charles Henry Davis had taken command of the Federal squadron on May 9.: there is no antecedence for the squadron, was this the ships that ran past Island No. 10's defences or the naval ships of 12 April?
  • I've rejigged this section to clarify that the Fort Donelson, Island No. 10, and Fort Pillow Federal fleet is the same unit
• with the rest of his fleet upriver;...: suggest "with the rest of Davis's fleet upriver;"
  • I've rephrased this sentence, so the issue is no longer in question (this applied to both Davis and the prior commanding officer, so I have now named)

Battle

• ... fire another volley in the Confederate ship.: suggest " fire another volley into the Confederate ship."
  • Done
• ...; this time the fire came from Carondelet.: the "this time" seems unnecessary since the previous sentence already refers to Carondelet.
  • Done
• The Federal vessels had lighter drafts than...: same comment as the lead.
  • See reply above

Sources

• Sources appear reliable, the majority are university presses.
• I did a spot check based on the online source (cite 1); this checks out OK, AGF on the others.

Other stuff

• Image tags OK
• Dupelinks: 'Memphis, Tennessee', USS Benton, USS Pittsburgh, USS St Louis
  • Should be all resolved

I made a few little tweaks as I went through the article, but otherwise that's it for me. Cheers, Zawed ( talk) 10:14, 28 April 2023 (UTC) reply

• • @ Zawed: - All concerns have been actioned except for the light draft one, which I've posted a response to above. Hog Farm _Talk 03:15, 29 April 2023 (UTC) reply
    • This looks to be all in order, so am passing as GA as I believe that the article meets the necessary criteria. Cheers, Zawed ( talk) 04:20, 29 April 2023 (UTC) reply