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Reviewer: Kaiser matias ( talk · contribs) 00:57, 13 April 2021 (UTC)
I'll start reviewing this in the coming days. However before I start, I wanted to mention that I just read Making Uzbekistan: Nation, Empire, and Revolution in the Early USSR by Adeeb Khalid, and he discusses Fitrat considerably throughout the book (Khalid even notes Fitrat comes up in every chapter). However the book is not mentioned here as a source, when it probably should be considered. I also believe Khalid has written about Fitrat in other places (I haven't done a full look, but his citations in Making Uzbekistan suggest this). That all said, I would strongly encourage trying to get a copy of Khalid's book and incorporating some of what he wrote. I can hold off on a full review if you'd like, but feel that the article would lack comprehensiveness to go without.
Kaiser matias (
talk) 00:57, 13 April 2021 (UTC)
@ Man77 Hello, I will be taking over the GAN from here. I apologize for the delay but hopefully, we can get this review underway ASAP. Due to school/work obligations, I will begin with a template and add in my notes as I go, I plan to get all my notes in within the next day or so and I will adjust the review time frame accordingly. If you have any questions feel free to Ping me or go to my talk page. Etriusus ( talk) 04:54, 17 July 2021 (UTC)
A note about myself, I tend to correct grammatical errors unless I either can't understand the sentence meaning or the errors to too numerous. Etriusus ( talk) 01:42, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
Templates for my own convenience:
Done
1. It is reasonable well written the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct
According to reports, Fitrat took part in establishing these societies and thanks to a grant given by the secret "society for the education of the children" (Tarbiyayi atfol) which was financed by merchants Fitrat himself was able to go to Istanbul in spring of 1910 shortly after the very first group.needs rewriting, its a run on-sentence and contains multiple grammatical errors, some of which I've already fixed. Etriusus ( talk) 01:58, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
Back then, Istanbul was governed by the Young Turks, which constitutes historical circumstances which would go on to have essential influence on Fitrat and on the activities and the general social surroundings of the Bukharan students in Istanbul.. This sentence is hard to follow, especially the phrasing "back then". Etriusus ( talk) 02:06, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
In opposition to and in exile from the Bukharan emir he sided with the communists.Please specify what communist group this was. Etriusus ( talk) 00:51, 21 July 2021 (UTC)
2. It is factually accurate and verifiable It contains a reference section, presented in accordance with the layout style guideline;
3. It is broad in its coverage
4. It has a neutral point of view
well-travelled, well-readin section 2.1 necessary? If there is a specific reason for this term, please state it, otherwise it needs to be removed per: WP:PUFFERY Etriusus ( talk) 01:42, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
5. It is stable
6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
Intial Impressions: There is a good amount of work that is still needed. I don't know if these issues can be resolved within a week's time. I will extend the review window by a day due to the delay on getting my full review out. If you have any questions, concerns, or justifications for why something should remain as is, please feel free to Ping me.
Etriusus (
talk) 03:58, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
Recommendations
This is a summary of what needs to be done, detailed points are listed above.
GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (
|
visual edit |
history) ·
Article talk (
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Watch
Reviewer: Kaiser matias ( talk · contribs) 00:57, 13 April 2021 (UTC)
I'll start reviewing this in the coming days. However before I start, I wanted to mention that I just read Making Uzbekistan: Nation, Empire, and Revolution in the Early USSR by Adeeb Khalid, and he discusses Fitrat considerably throughout the book (Khalid even notes Fitrat comes up in every chapter). However the book is not mentioned here as a source, when it probably should be considered. I also believe Khalid has written about Fitrat in other places (I haven't done a full look, but his citations in Making Uzbekistan suggest this). That all said, I would strongly encourage trying to get a copy of Khalid's book and incorporating some of what he wrote. I can hold off on a full review if you'd like, but feel that the article would lack comprehensiveness to go without.
Kaiser matias (
talk) 00:57, 13 April 2021 (UTC)
@ Man77 Hello, I will be taking over the GAN from here. I apologize for the delay but hopefully, we can get this review underway ASAP. Due to school/work obligations, I will begin with a template and add in my notes as I go, I plan to get all my notes in within the next day or so and I will adjust the review time frame accordingly. If you have any questions feel free to Ping me or go to my talk page. Etriusus ( talk) 04:54, 17 July 2021 (UTC)
A note about myself, I tend to correct grammatical errors unless I either can't understand the sentence meaning or the errors to too numerous. Etriusus ( talk) 01:42, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
Templates for my own convenience:
Done
1. It is reasonable well written the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct
According to reports, Fitrat took part in establishing these societies and thanks to a grant given by the secret "society for the education of the children" (Tarbiyayi atfol) which was financed by merchants Fitrat himself was able to go to Istanbul in spring of 1910 shortly after the very first group.needs rewriting, its a run on-sentence and contains multiple grammatical errors, some of which I've already fixed. Etriusus ( talk) 01:58, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
Back then, Istanbul was governed by the Young Turks, which constitutes historical circumstances which would go on to have essential influence on Fitrat and on the activities and the general social surroundings of the Bukharan students in Istanbul.. This sentence is hard to follow, especially the phrasing "back then". Etriusus ( talk) 02:06, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
In opposition to and in exile from the Bukharan emir he sided with the communists.Please specify what communist group this was. Etriusus ( talk) 00:51, 21 July 2021 (UTC)
2. It is factually accurate and verifiable It contains a reference section, presented in accordance with the layout style guideline;
3. It is broad in its coverage
4. It has a neutral point of view
well-travelled, well-readin section 2.1 necessary? If there is a specific reason for this term, please state it, otherwise it needs to be removed per: WP:PUFFERY Etriusus ( talk) 01:42, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
5. It is stable
6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
Intial Impressions: There is a good amount of work that is still needed. I don't know if these issues can be resolved within a week's time. I will extend the review window by a day due to the delay on getting my full review out. If you have any questions, concerns, or justifications for why something should remain as is, please feel free to Ping me.
Etriusus (
talk) 03:58, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
Recommendations
This is a summary of what needs to be done, detailed points are listed above.