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Reviewer: Grandiose ( talk · contribs) 17:03, 5 December 2011 (UTC) I'll be doing a full review shortly, but the article looks very promising. I haev made a couple of small changes. Grandiose ( me, talk, contribs) 17:03, 5 December 2011 (UTC)
The lead fails to make clear the difference between the "Maguire/Maguire/Kissling position paper holding about 80 signatures" and the advertisement. What it has to make clear is that the position and theory was then adapted into advertisement form, rather than this whole escapade being about the advertisement. Advertisement or no advertisement, there were other facets to the movement that lead to it. I wasn't particularly happy with my changes, but this should be put across somehow. Grandiose ( me, talk, contribs) 19:02, 7 December 2011 (UTC)
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Reviewer: Grandiose ( talk · contribs) 17:03, 5 December 2011 (UTC) I'll be doing a full review shortly, but the article looks very promising. I haev made a couple of small changes. Grandiose ( me, talk, contribs) 17:03, 5 December 2011 (UTC)
The lead fails to make clear the difference between the "Maguire/Maguire/Kissling position paper holding about 80 signatures" and the advertisement. What it has to make clear is that the position and theory was then adapted into advertisement form, rather than this whole escapade being about the advertisement. Advertisement or no advertisement, there were other facets to the movement that lead to it. I wasn't particularly happy with my changes, but this should be put across somehow. Grandiose ( me, talk, contribs) 19:02, 7 December 2011 (UTC)