I'll try to get this reviewed in the next couple days.
Criteria
1. Prose ✓Pass
2. Verifiability ✓Pass
3. Depth of Coverage ✓Pass
4. Neutral ✓Pass
5. Stable ✓Pass
6. Illustrations ✓Pass
7. Miscellaneous ✓Pass
Comments
1.
"Among these were the New York Central Building at 47th Street and Park Avenue, as well as the Grand Central Palace across 42nd Street from the present Bowery Savings Bank Building." - This isn't wrong, per se, but since you're using among these (implies plural), and then list one item, and then create a different clause. I feel like this would read better as " ... and Park Avenue and the Grand Central ... ". My grasp of grammar isn't great though, so if you dislike this, keep as is.
"offered $2.9 million for the hotel (equal to $28 million in 2018[a])" - Just to double check that this is the intended meaning, the hotel was still standing at that point?
"The presence of the new Bowery Savings Bank branch and the presence of brokerage firms" - Repetitive phrasing here, can the sentence be rewrote without using "the presence of" twice in the sentence?
I'll try to get this reviewed in the next couple days.
Criteria
1. Prose ✓Pass
2. Verifiability ✓Pass
3. Depth of Coverage ✓Pass
4. Neutral ✓Pass
5. Stable ✓Pass
6. Illustrations ✓Pass
7. Miscellaneous ✓Pass
Comments
1.
"Among these were the New York Central Building at 47th Street and Park Avenue, as well as the Grand Central Palace across 42nd Street from the present Bowery Savings Bank Building." - This isn't wrong, per se, but since you're using among these (implies plural), and then list one item, and then create a different clause. I feel like this would read better as " ... and Park Avenue and the Grand Central ... ". My grasp of grammar isn't great though, so if you dislike this, keep as is.
"offered $2.9 million for the hotel (equal to $28 million in 2018[a])" - Just to double check that this is the intended meaning, the hotel was still standing at that point?
"The presence of the new Bowery Savings Bank branch and the presence of brokerage firms" - Repetitive phrasing here, can the sentence be rewrote without using "the presence of" twice in the sentence?